Has anyone else stood at the edge of a cliff / great height and failed to jump?

[itsover14]

I did a lot of research years ago about jumping from a great height, if I recall correctly: since there's a microsecond delay between between what we see and experience, if you jump from a tall enough height, you may not even feel anything on impact.

That might have been specific for if you just reach terminal velocity (I think 1500'); this was over a decade ago I researched this.

Well, I did go and find a cliff, but though it was quite high, it wasn't a sheer cliff face. There were some tree tops maybe 100' below and I was terrified of hitting them and feeling a lot of pain. (And then, I suppose, hitting the ground next and rolling down for hundreds of feet.)

So obviously I chickened out. But, things have truly reached an impasse. And you know, in that 10+, I've done a lot of treatment, medications etc etc. I wonder if I could do it again; I'm considering the Cliffs of Moher which are certainly impressive cliffs.

However, though most people would consider the height (over 700' at its tallest) to be a selling point, well I've been bungy jumping from quite a tall height. And what surprised me the most was how much time I had to think as I fell. So, obviously don't like the thought of that.

And yet and yet and yet. That's what this is all about, getting to the point where even those last seconds of discomfort are acceptable rather than the endless days of my existence. Dealing with things I can't deal with anymore. Well I guess we'll see, I have to make a choice soon. If SN/hanging can't be arranged to my satisfaction, I guess there's just that one option left. I'm at least grateful to be relatively near such ideal cliffs for jumping.

 

[Xiaojiu]

Yes, I was at a bridge in the mountains and failed to jump. I:

 

[itsover14]

Yes, I was at a bridge in the mountains and failed to jump. I:

It's so difficult isn't it :(

But, I am beginning to think that it might be my only option. So, just gonna hafta put up with that terror I guess?! :(

 

[slitwristsbleedcold]

bridge but i was too scared, actually not even scared i just idk, i froze there, ig, and walked away

 

[metfan647]

I have been to a few cliff edges but not with any immediate plan. Along with SN, jumping at height are my planned ways to go.

Excuse my ignorance, but never hears of the Cliffs of Moher. Impressive area and that is some height. I couldn't tell from images if there are any areas without water at the bottom. Even with a fatal height like that, the idea of jumping into water terrifies me.

I have a cliff edge lined up but it's now some distance from me. I've lost the ability to be a bit more impulsive. I have also thought about those few seconds of contemplation and how they could consume me with momentary regret. I, like you, also think that those few seconds can't be worse than the misery of existing.

 

[Xiaojiu]

It's so difficult isn't it :(

But, I am beginning to think that it might be my only option. So, just gonna hafta put up with that terror I guess?! :(

I understand how you feel :( it's so difficult af. The SI is hard to overcome. I'm still dealing with that myself and also guilt for my husband and those I will hurt. The bridge I was at was around 300+ feet. And an old woman driving stopped and picked me up She didn't leave until I got into her vehicle

Also, if you're jumping, please, please, please don't jump from a low height. O:

I read on Reddit recently this year that someone jumped, and ended up disabled with chronic pain. And they regret their decision because they jumped at height that wasn't that high saying their life is now worse before jumping. :(

 

[Aisling1710]

Been there once - just over five years ago. In my case, it was the feeling of 'what if it fails?' and of course the SI. it really is difficult.