Venting Happiness is a lie..

[LittleLadyWorthless]

I would be happy if I died tonight..

 

[Stan]

is there a special reason for that?

 

[JimFord99]

I would be happy if I died tonight..

Wouldn't be we all? Yes, I understand. But it does not happen like this, it takes some effort and patience.

 

[bluesky1972-2019]

Can't say I've ever really known true happiness. Always felt like I shouldn't be here and nothing in life can make me happy.

 

[JimFord99]

I sort of really agree. I can'tsay I have ever been happy. It is just there, aburder, ....

 

[rmsorensen]

I have felt external joy and pleasure, but I have never truly felt happy with myself since my adolescence, and have only learned clever ways to avoid people being concerned, and having to fake like I'm happy for fear of them judging me, or of them internalizing my negative emotions. I have since struggled trying to feel "normal" when all the while feeling intrinsically that it's probably a waste of time. Even if it's irrational, I can't seem to shut it off, and it only causes other people stress and keeps me locked in my own head. I also tend to find myself internalizing other's positive emotions and using them to feel like I'm happy too, but it just ends up being emotionally draining for the other person, because I begin to rely on their positivity, often finding I lack any authentic positive emotions to reciprocate. Happiness requires a sound self awareness that I seem to lack, not sure if you relate to what I've said.

 

[Rachel74]

I've felt happiness and sadness. Sadly the sadness overtakes the happiness x

 

[rmsorensen]

Can't say I've ever really known true happiness. Always felt like I shouldn't be here and nothing in life can make me happy.

Do people reassuring you start to feel like a sick joke after a while, or is that just me? I usually feel like I'm at baseline when I'm most down on myself and want it to be over. I still reach out, because I was taught that's the right thing to do, but I'm not so sure anymore.

 

[Dawn0071111]

I felt happy when I was with him...

I can't be happy on my own....

He took my happiness away..

Im dead inside..

Just need to finish the job.

 

[Barf]

I agree, I think happiness is illusory. I think this about the sanctity of life as well. I don't think humans really understand what they're talking about when they talk about happiness and the preciousness of life.

I think it's our lizard brains affecting our emotions and convincing us that because there is an innate drive to survive, that life is precious and good, and meaningful. Not true, necessarily.

 

[rmsorensen]

I felt happy when I was with him...

I can't be happy on my own....

He took my happiness away..

Im dead inside..

Just need to finish the job.

I never like to hear that people can't be happy on their own. Especially if they are on their own. I hope your situation works out, I know how it feels to hear that sometimes when you're not sure yourself. But someone out there knows how you feel, and a lot of other people probably feel that way as well, and I think it will take reaching those people to at least open the discussion and get on the same page to reach a wider audience. I don't want us to die, but I think we should have the option.

 

[GeorgeJL]

You shouldn't strive for happiness, it's a route to suffering, but rather strive for meaning to your life. Happiness is felting, it's great when you have it but it shouldn't be your motivation in life. Instead striving for meaning is much more valuable.

Jordan Peterson - Don't Strive For Happiness


Don't Push for Happiness - Prof. Jordan Peterson

 

[okaoki]

I'm not the main character of my story , i never experience true happiness .

 

[rmsorensen]

I'm not the main character of my story , i never experience true happiness .

I feel like this is the case with most people, they either feel like they're not the main character in their story, or they simply don't care for their own story.

I'm not the main character of my story , i never experience true happiness .

Have you considered taking your own role a little more seriously? I don't mean to assume anything or to talk down to you in any way, but if it could be helpful in any way to consider, I thought I should ask. I think that has been a large part of my problem, and I know how bad situations can get, but community is the only true answer to finding your role. The videos shared in this thread are really great.
Helping people who share our experience, and finding a common goal I think would be life changing for anyone. I want nothing more than to find community, and help other people who want to end human suffering.
I feel like there are a lot of people that are at the bottom of the barrel and want something to live for. I know I do, or at least closure after everything I've been through. I know I deserve that, and I think every person deserves that.