Resource Grieving Mama that desperately Needs Opinions, advice, help ASAP PLEASE, PLEASE 🙏

[AZcardinals]

I've been looking at a few methods and could really use some advice!! My infant son passed away on Feb. 13th, 2023 just 10 days before his 1st bday. Every minute of every day that I have to live without him is complete torture. So the SN method seems like the most appealing. I live in the U.S. and has anyone had success getting the SN delivered to them? I've only been able to find some that requires a business account. If someone could message me or if anyone can point me in the right direction I would really appreciate it.
Secondary question.... If anyone has had it successfully delivered to them did you have to sign for it or anything?

 

[pharmacoepia]

Unfortunately, we cannot give sources out loud as that is against site rules.

Also, are you really sure you want to do this? I know this sounds ironic coming from this site, but honestly, only ten days and you have gone for the emergency panic button already? I know you live in the U.S, and I have seen first hand what miscarriage or the death of a child does to a mother. Most need psychiatric treatment and they can at least have a semi-normal life after.

My philosophy is to only CTB when you have exhausted everything else, experimental clinical trials, psychs, SSRI's, alternative medicine, etc.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I agree with @pharmacoepia that you should get some help. Still, there are plenty of horror stories about people who have taken psyche meds and have ended up more screwed up after taking them, so I'd avoid those at all costs. I'd certainly try to get some counseling first before considering CTB. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine what it's like to lose a child.

 

[Letgo]

I am sorry for your loss. Thinking of you both.

 

[Vizzy]

I've been looking at a few methods and could really use some advice!! My infant son passed away on Feb. 13th, 2023 just 10 days before his 1st bday. Every minute of every day that I have to live without him is complete torture. So the SN method seems like the most appealing. I live in the U.S. and has anyone had success getting the SN delivered to them? I've only been able to find some that requires a business account. If someone could message me or if anyone can point me in the right direction I would really appreciate it.
Secondary question.... If anyone has had it successfully delivered to them did you have to sign for it or anything?

Yes I think someone have to sign it because I heard a story where a guy's brother got the package and not gave the package to him

Hope you find peace from ctb, do whatever you like, sn is not bad if you are able to obtain and follow the procedure on how to take it!

Sn is not hard to get, search the site using the keyword like sn sources or I got my sn, you will get a bunch of results then message in those threads or you can pm those people to get the sources, you can always get the sources in the pm

Don't worry sn ain't hard to find!

 

[Touhou]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you're able to find peace postmortem.

 

[SoftWorries]

Your son obviously had an incredible mother filled with so much love. I'm so so sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry your heart is broken.

 

[pharmacoepia]

I agree with @pharmacoepia that you should get some help. Still, there are plenty of horror stories about people who have taken psyche meds and have ended up more screwed up after taking them, so I'd avoid those at all costs. I'd certainly try to get some counseling first before considering CTB. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine what it's like to lose a child.

It's rare to be permanently scarred by SSRI's; most sexual dysfunction and cognitive fog is resolved after discontinuation. If it effects her permanently, then I guess it's more of a reason to try more alternatives or CTB. Buproprion can be especially useful for PSSD.

I doubt she will experience PSSD, especially since PSSD is more common in men. It's rare to be scarred for more than 6 months. It's even rarer after 5 years. The current record in academic literature is so far 20 years.

Maybe she should try psilocybin/psilocin, which doesn't have any sexual side effects?

 

[betternever2havbeen]

I'm very sorry for your loss-the pain and grief must be incredibly intense. Imo you need to give yourself time to heal and come to terms with things. I assume you have family who are also grieving this loss and then if you go too, imagine their grief...I think you need help and support right now not sources.

 

[Hollowman]

Unfortunately, we cannot give sources out loud as that is against site rules.

Also, are you really sure you want to do this? I know this sounds ironic coming from this site, but honestly, only ten days and you have gone for the emergency panic button already? I know you live in the U.S, and I have seen first hand what miscarriage or the death of a child does to a mother. Most need psychiatric treatment and they can at least have a semi-normal life after.

My philosophy is to only CTB when you have exhausted everything else, experimental clinical trials, psychs, SSRI's, alternative medicine, etc.

She said 10 days from the first birthday. It's been over 3 months since the death.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

It's rare to be permanently scarred by SSRI's; most sexual dysfunction and cognitive fog is resolved after discontinuation. If it effects her permanently, then I guess it's more of a reason to try more alternatives or CTB. Buproprion can be especially useful for PSSD.

I doubt she will experience PSSD, especially since PSSD is more common in men. It's rare to be scarred for more than 6 months. It's even rarer after 5 years. The current record in academic literature is so far 20 years.

Maybe she should try psilocybin/psilocin, which doesn't have any sexual side effects?

Maybe, as long as she stays away from the Benzos.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/side-effects/201011/brain-damage-from-benzodiazepines

https://www.brainandspinalcord.org/faqs/sci/what-happens-to-the-brain-during-benzo-withdrawal/

https://www.bmj.com/content/349/bmj.g5312/rr/775731

https://benzoreform.org/benzodiazepine-injury-syndrome-and-recovery/

 

[EmmaD]

I've been looking at a few methods and could really use some advice!! My infant son passed away on Feb. 13th, 2023 just 10 days before his 1st bday. Every minute of every day that I have to live without him is complete torture. So the SN method seems like the most appealing. I live in the U.S. and has anyone had success getting the SN delivered to them? I've only been able to find some that requires a business account. If someone could message me or if anyone can point me in the right direction I would really appreciate it.
Secondary question.... If anyone has had it successfully delivered to them did you have to sign for it or anything?

I'm so sorry you've experienced this.. it must be absolutely horrific and I completely understand your reasons for wanting to ctb. I hope you are able to find an SN source on here.. it might take some digging around to do but you should be able to find one.

It's rare to be permanently scarred by SSRI's; most sexual dysfunction and cognitive fog is resolved after discontinuation. If it effects her permanently, then I guess it's more of a reason to try more alternatives or CTB. Buproprion can be especially useful for PSSD.

I doubt she will experience PSSD, especially since PSSD is more common in men. It's rare to be scarred for more than 6 months. It's even rarer after 5 years. The current record in academic literature is so far 20 years.

Maybe she should try psilocybin/psilocin, which doesn't have any sexual side effects?

I don't think her concern right now is sexual side effects from drugs!

 

[FuneralCry]

I don't think the original poster asked for pro-life comments, and anyway it's a pro-choice forum to respect people's decisions, I think if the person who started this thread wanted to be given those empty words that they "need help", they wouldn't had made an account, researched the SN method and posted this.

To the orginal poster: I think there is less chance of recieving pro-life platitudes if you post the question about the method in the title and don't share anything about your situation. Sadly there is quite a lot of pro-lifers on here recently who just want to interfere, it makes them feel better about themselves "saving" people and prolonging their suffering.
But anyway I wish you the best OP, I hope that you find what you are searching for.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

@FuneralCry they've made ONE post and joined yesterday because they've had a very recent bereavement, they can't get any sources sent to them yet until they get their post count up anyway.

 

[lookingforsanctuary]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your son. I can't imagine your heartbreak. Would you like to share his story with us so that we can remember him with you?

 

[Jezzibell]

Oh I'm so sorry and can only imagine the devastation. This is a truly horrible thing to gave gone through.

If you research this forum you will see various posts where people have had deliveries but I don't know about USA. I'm in the UK. I don't think it is on your controlled substance list but I may be wrong given that the requirement to be a business is the same as UK.

I can only give you the cliche of time is a healer, but I do understand how and why you feel like you can't carry on.

This is your decision to make and I really hope that whatever path you choose you get respite from the grief. Xxxxx

 

[AZcardinals]

I'm very sorry for your loss-the pain and grief must be incredibly intense. Imo you need to give yourself time to heal and come to terms with things. I assume you have family who are also grieving this loss and then if you go too, imagine their grief...I think you need help and support right now not sources.

So I grew up in foster care and never met any family and my son's dad was extremely abusive so my son and I moved 4 hours away and the lack of family support or just support in general has made this a lot harder.

 

[AZcardinals]

Yes I think someone have to sign it because I heard a story where a guy's brother got the package and not gave the package to him

Hope you find peace from ctb, do whatever you like, sn is not bad if you are able to obtain and follow the procedure on how to take it!

Sn is not hard to get, search the site using the keyword like sn sources or I got my sn, you will get a bunch of results then message in those threads or you can pm those people to get the sources, you can always get the sources in the pm

Don't worry sn ain't hard to find!

Thank you

I agree with @pharmacoepia that you should get some help. Still, there are plenty of horror stories about people who have taken psyche meds and have ended up more screwed up after taking them, so I'd avoid those at all costs. I'd certainly try to get some counseling first before considering CTB. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine what it's like to lose a child.

Your right, you can't imagine. Especially since what killed was there very thing that was suppose to help him. He was one of the babies that died from the last formula recall. I do understand about getting help as I've been in therapy most of my life and I still am and I've been through multiple traumatic events but the pain from losing my son is excruciating and all consuming and it totally levels you and hits you right in the gut and takes your breath away. I don't wish this feeling in anyone.
Sorry I'm not trying to be a bitch, it's just ya it's something you can't imagine unless you've been through it ya know.

 

[stoiccactus]

I almost lost my son some years ago and I can only sort-of imagine what you are going through. I can't blame you for one second for wanting to ctb, if I lost my son I would 100% certainly do the same

 

[betternever2havbeen]

@AZcardinals I'm sorry if my post came over a bit pro-life and patronising. I realise I shouldn't have said anything, it's not my place to tell you you need help and I have no idea the pain you are going through.