Venting Going back to a time that you were happy

[agony1996]

Hey guys
I'm in so much emotional pain. It's horrible when you are sleeping and you dream of being in a place in the past when you were happy and then I wake up and realize your current circumstances and I have this painful knot in my throat that it's hard to breathe and so much sadness. I just so desperately wish I was back in that place of happiness but you just have to accept that your not, that your happiness is in the past and I know it will never come back and I can't accept my circumstances, my pain.
The worst part about ctbing is the thought of your loved ones having to endure this pain or worse. It shatters my heart into a million pieces just thinking about I start to bawl my mom is 80 and she has been the best mother she sacrificed everything for me and my siblings, she always went above and beyond to make sure we had whatever we wanted, she always protected us, maybe sometimes a little too much.my and my siblings are her whole world she's in a time in her life where she deserves to have us take care of her and make sure she is happy so when I imagine ctbing it's just me being so cruel to her, after everything she's done and sacrificed this is how I pay her back, it just kills me.
I hate the universe and what I really don't understand is why people, good people like slot of us on this site, why we have to suffer so much, what did we do to deserve this

 

[BackToLobby]

what did we do to deserve this

This is what I ask myself everyday.

I know I haven't been the best person in the world but seeing how I have lost everything and having to end myself to stop suffering is a dirty torture

 

[agony1996]

This is what I ask myself everyday.

I know I haven't been the best person in the world but seeing how I have lost everything and having to end myself to stop suffering is a dirty torture

1000%.None of us deserve to be in this torturous existence enduring unbearable pain.

 

[catnowmeowmeow]

I used to float now I just fall down
I used to know but I'm not sure now…

 

[Cress]

Going back in time even just to visit a old memory I think is a power a lot of people would love to have. Unfortunately everything is temporary.

I'm sorry you're hurting so much and I wish you nothing but the best. If you ever need someone to talk to my DMS are open.

My younger cousin killed himself By jumping in front of a train at the end of November of last year. He was like a little younger brother. We really didn't talk very much before the end he was very isolated he just liked being alone on his PC. However I gotta be honest I'm really not coping very well with it. Some days I just curl up into a ball on my couch and don't move Posted today. It's been around eight months now and it still hasn't gotten that much better.

Feels like I lost a son or something It hurts Deeply. With all of that said I understand that he reached his limit of all he could take. I'm not upset with him or anything like that. The only thing that is left is just pain.

 

[HelpDoesNotExist]

My parents keep taking my money so Idc if my CTB hurts them, but happy memories actually hurt the worst for me. When I remember the times I had with someone I can never replace, it makes my chest and head hurt and I want to die right on the spot. The regret and guilt is constant and only drowned out with drugs and booze. My parents restrict my finances so I can't have my only cope so they should think about that when I'm gone, maybe if they just let me drink and use MY OWN MONEY then I would still be alive.

 

[agony1996]

My parents keep taking my money so Idc if my CTB hurts them, but happy memories actually hurt the worst for me. When I remember the times I had with someone I can never replace, it makes my chest and head hurt and I want to die right on the spot. The regret and guilt is constant and only drowned out with drugs and booze. My parents restrict my finances so I can't have my only cope so they should think about that when I'm gone, maybe if they just let me drink and use MY OWN MONEY then I would still be alive.

It sounds like you're hurting a lot, I know what it's like to drown your sorrows with drugs, I stopped using the only

Going back in time even just to visit a old memory I think is a power a lot of people would love to have. Unfortunately everything is temporary.

I'm sorry you're hurting so much and I wish you nothing but the best. If you ever need someone to talk to my DMS are open.

My younger cousin killed himself By jumping in front of a train at the end of November of last year. He was like a little younger brother. We really didn't talk very much before the end he was very isolated he just liked being alone on his PC. However I gotta be honest I'm really not coping very well with it. Some days I just curl up into a ball on my couch and don't move Posted today. It's been around eight months now and it still hasn't gotten that much better.

Feels like I lost a son or something It hurts Deeply. With all of that said I understand that he reached his limit of all he could take. I'm not upset with him or anything like that. The only thing that is left is just pain.

I'm so sorry for your loss if he was like a brother eight months is not a lot I understand the pain must be very fresh.
I guess like us he was going through pain of his own and now he's in peace and one day you'll see him again, I'm sure he's watching over you.
Have you seen any therapists for help in the grieving process?
You can message me anytime you feel like talking and I'm truly sorry for everything you're going through.

 

[voudebase]

Eu também me sinto assim, fui muito feliz e vivi uma vida linda até o final de 2023, nos primeiros dias de 2024 fiquei doente e perdi a vontade de viver

 

[thatisitguy]

Hey guys
I'm in so much emotional pain. It's horrible when you are sleeping and you dream of being in a place in the past when you were happy and then I wake up and realize your current circumstances and I have this painful knot in my throat that it's hard to breathe and so much sadness. I just so desperately wish I was back in that place of happiness but you just have to accept that your not, that your happiness is in the past and I know it will never come back and I can't accept my circumstances, my pain.
The worst part about ctbing is the thought of your loved ones having to endure this pain or worse. It shatters my heart into a million pieces just thinking about I start to bawl my mom is 80 and she has been the best mother she sacrificed everything for me and my siblings, she always went above and beyond to make sure we had whatever we wanted, she always protected us, maybe sometimes a little too much.my and my siblings are her whole world she's in a time in her life where she deserves to have us take care of her and make sure she is happy so when I imagine ctbing it's just me being so cruel to her, after everything she's done and sacrificed this is how I pay her back, it just kills me.
I hate the universe and what I really don't understand is why people, good people like slot of us on this site, why we have to suffer so much, what did we do to deserve this

My mom is about the same age and it too made me sad to think about her losing her child the way that I am choosing to go out. I had a few childhood friends who killed themselves and their families are never the same and carry around guilt and sadness. While that isn't fair, it's less fair to continue to suffer just so your family won't get upset. You wouldn't want your mom to suffer unbearable pain and suffering just because she was worried that you might get upset at her death so why should you?