Venting Getting Impatient

[TheSource]

My suicide notes have been written and revised and revised again 20 fold. I cut off my friends. My OxyContin just arrived today. Theoretically, I have enough OC to fatally OD as long as I have another downer with it. And I have 150 mL of whiskey.

But I spent too much time researching how to make my OD work to throw it away for impatience.

My sources of information and my current OD plan, for those curious:

Informational resources for opioids, benzos, and alcohol

Since most people are against OD as a method, there isn't much information here on how to do it. Since I'm using overdose as my method, I figured I may as well cite my sources on a thread. I'm in no way encouraging anyone else to try this. Attempting and failing CTB from overdose can lead to a...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Oxy Polysubstance CTB? (Oxycodone + Xanax + Alcohol + Grapefruit Juice + Maybe Tylenol)

The only method available to me is OD and these are the only drugs available to me. Please don't point me toward another method, just reliable doses. I'm 145 lbs (66 kgs), about 22% body fat, and a female. No tolerance for anything. I was thinking about just taking a bunch of downers...

sanctioned-suicide.net

I haven't been drinking grapefruit juice (increases concentrations of xanax) yet, and my Xans aren't gonna come in until early next week.

Not to mention, my paycheck doesn't come in for another two weeks. I mentioned it on another thread, but I'm giving all my money away to a former friend. I want them to have as much money as possible (which is the only reason I got a job before catching the bus), so I want to make sure I stay alive until I get that check so I can transfer the money to them.

Theoretically, I could die right now. But I want to make sure everything runs as smoothly as possible. So it's just another fortnight of waiting, I guess.

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best of luck with your plans and I hope that when the time feels right for you to leave you find the freedom you wish for.

 

[avaruus]

how much oxy did you end up getting?

 

[TheSource]

how much oxy did you end up getting?

200 mg (extended release)

 

[avaruus]

200 mg (extended release)

Nice, of course make sure to break the ER.

 

[TheSource]

Nice, of course make sure to break the ER.

How come? Would it cause issues if I took the pills whole?

 

[avaruus]

How come? Would it cause issues if I took the pills whole?

Yes, extended release makes the pill release the drug slowly and steadily over a 12-hour period.
It would be the same as taking 16mg every hour, which gives you a nice high but won't lead to a lethal overdose.
You can just chew them if they are OC's and not OP's, tastes very bitter and disgusting tho.



If it's OP and not OC, then you have to break the extended release in some other way, i'm not sure exactly how tho.

 

[TheSource]

Yes, extended release makes the pill release the drug slowly and steadily over a 12-hour period.
It would be the same as taking 16mg every hour, which gives you a nice high but won't lead to a lethal overdose.
You can just chew them if they are OC's and not OP's, tastes very bitter and disgusting tho.

View attachment 121017

If it's OP and not OC, then you have to break the extended release in some other way, i'm not sure exactly how tho.

Ah, I actually read in a scentific abstract (link in my resources thread) that extended release is actually twice as likely to lead to OD. It was the only source I found comparing the lethality (rather than likelihood for abuse) on the two. I'm still looking for another source to verify, though

 

[avaruus]

Ah, I actually read in a scentific abstract (link in my resources thread) that extended release is actually twice as likely to lead to OD. It was the only source I found comparing the lethality (rather than likelihood for abuse) on the two. I'm still looking for another source to verify, though

Hmm, didn't know that. Maybe it has to do something with the longer duration, as oxys peak high lasts only for about 1-2 hours before decreasing to normal levels in about 2-4 hours.
Maybe the respitary depression takes a long time to kill you.
Still what i've heard from other recreational users is that extended release is a waste of the drug as the drugs effects are evenly spread instead of being concentrated into the 1-2h window.
Anyway, if you find more info, feel free to share your findings :)

 

[TheSource]

Still what i've heard from other recreational users is that extended release is a waste of the drug

Yeah. Everything I read comparing ER and IR said IR has a much greater potential for abuse. Effectiveness in reducing pain – for those who actually need them – was also compared, but none of them compared lethality.

 

[TheSource]

My Xanax came in. I just need to go to the grocery store for grapefruit juice and then everything is set.

I'm really gonna struggle to have enough patience to wait two weeks for this paycheck.

 

[TheSource]

I have the grapefruit juice. It was the very last thing I needed. I'll start drinking it tomorrow or after.

I'm gonna shower and try the Xanax later. I wanna see what effect it has on me so I can gauge in what order I should take everything on my ctb date (ie. take the oxy first to make sure I actually OD in case xans knock me out too quickly to take everything, or take the xans first to reduce SI).

My source gave me extra xans, so I can afford to test out a quarter of a bar (0.5 mg) before the date. And since my date is two weeks out, that gives me time to let the Xanax completely exit my body so I don't accidentally build a tolerance to it right before I get to my bus stop.

Hmm, didn't know that. Maybe it has to do something with the longer duration, as oxys peak high lasts only for about 1-2 hours before decreasing to normal levels in about 2-4 hours.
Maybe the respitary depression takes a long time to kill you.
Still what i've heard from other recreational users is that extended release is a waste of the drug as the drugs effects are evenly spread instead of being concentrated into the 1-2h window.
Anyway, if you find more info, feel free to share your findings :)

I found a different article that said IR had a higher chance to cause overdose:

What Is A Lethal Dose Of Oxycodone (OxyContin)? - Addiction Resource

Oxycodone (OxyContin) is a prescription opioid that can be lethal in high doses. Learn the signs of an oxycodone overdose now.

www.addictionresource.net

It didn't say whether this was because IR gets abused more often than ER, or if it happens on the same dosage. Since the abstract I found *did* compare the doses, I'm gonna go with that.

On top of the fact that since too much oxy can cause you to vomit, ER gives me time to fall asleep before I feel the effects of it. The Xanax and alcohol will stay in my system plenty long to enhance the effects of the Oxycodone when it actually does kick in. The xans should have me asleep by then. If the oxy causes me to vomit anyway, I'll likely asphyxiate in my sleep.

 

[TheSource]

I'm giving all my money away to a former friend.

I swear, if I was doing it for anyone else, I would have caught the bus by now. I don't feel like waiting another week and a half for a single paycheck when I could be dead by tomorrow. I already have some money set aside for them and don't need to wait.

But they deserve the world, and I can't give that to them. So if all I'm waiting on is this measly $75, then damnit, they're gonna get that additional $75.