General tips for talking to someone who might be experiencing delusions or psychosis

[Whale_bones]

Hey everyone, so by nature of this forum we get people with all sorts of life experiences here. None of us can diagnose each other, and we don't know what it's like to be in another person's shoes.

That said, it's not uncommon to see threads where people are talking about being stalked by the government, watched and tracked by malicious agencies, and other things that can seem unusual or implausible to many readers.

The immediate response to these threads, understandably, is to try and convince the OP out of their position by reasoning through it. After all, talking through things logically is what helps many people in emotional crisis here, so the urge to do that is very understandable, and I believe the grand majority of people have nothing but good intentions with that.

However, if someone is experiencing delusions, it's simply not possible to convince them out of their beliefs. It's more likely to make them feel defensive, shut down and even reinforce their beliefs.

Spoiler: As a note:

I'm not a mental health professional or an expert, these are just tips I gathered when trying to learn how to best support a family member who has schizophrenia. I really appreciate the good will from people responding to these posts, I believe this community genuinely helps people and if more information can help us do that, I think that's a positive!

On to the tips!

Don't debate the specifics of their beliefs

No matter what information you present, they will not see it as proof. In states that cause delusions, the brain is not able to take in and asses new information in the way it normally would; this is why even people who are very rational and logical in other areas of their lives will still hold unshakably to a delusional belief.

It's not uncommon for someone experiencing a delusion to actually incorporate new evidence into their belief system, making it stronger.

Avoid judgment and focus on the feelings

What the person is experiencing is 100% real to them; their fear and any negative feelings are just as intense as bad feelings that come from any other situation. You can calmly state that you see the situation differently, without making judgments about them being wrong, irrational or illogical, and validate that the experience is stressful and difficult for them.

Don't over-focus on things they're scared of

Try not to repeatedly bring up specific fears that cause them stress (if they have a fear of the government watching them, don't go into a story about how the government persecuted a public figure).

Support them in the same way you would another poster

Delusions shouldn't be debated nor validated, so instead of talking mainly about specific beliefs, support and interact with the person the same way you would anyone else here. Whether that be sharing common interests and things you find relief in, resonating with their feelings and the way they phrase things, or cracking jokes; whatever is natural for you and your communication style.

~~~

I'm just writing this up as a general outline, don't worry about being perfect or getting it wrong- I only started learning about this when I had a family member who was experiencing it. Anyone who has additional knowledge, feel free to add on to this thread

 

[TransilvanianHunger]

Excellent points!

I'd like to add something else that might be useful, especially if the person in question is someone you have a relationship with in real life (e.g., a friend, family member, etc.), particularly if they're receiving treatment or if they're already aware of the fact that they experience hallucinations and they feel comfortable talking about them when not in a psychotic state.

Talk to them about it, ask questions, and, most importantly, listen.

Many people who experience psychosis avoid talking about it not because they don't want to, but because they feel like the subject might make others uncomfortable, or it might push people they care about away. There is a ton of stigma around psychosis still. So, if someone in your life is dealing with it (and knows it, see the OP re: not trying to "convince them" of anything), show them that you are someone they can talk to about their experience without fear of being judged, or of making you feel uncomfortable — it is simply a fact of life, and for one reason or another they are dealing with it. That does not make them weirdos, crazies, or less human. Of course, they might not want to open up about their experience right away (or at all), and that's something to be respected. Just show them that, if they want to talk, you're available and ready to listen.

As for what to do while they're experiencing hallucinations, delusions, or things along those lines; besides the great advice in the OP, I'd suggest asking the person directly when they're not in a psychotic state. In my experience, some people will want you to "challenge" their delusions somehow, some people don't want to acknowledge it themselves to begin with and just try to wait it out, some people don't want you to challenge the delusion at all... The responses are varied, and they depend greatly on how the person experiences and relates to their hallucinations or delusions.

As an example, a young man who, in his psychotic state, believed himself to be made of glass and would avoid any sort of contact, for fear of shattering, said that, during that state, he wished someone would just walk up to him and grab his hand — in some way, during his delusion he knew that his belief was false, yet he was unable to shake it or ignore it; someone grabbing his hand would "challenge" his belief in a way that he felt would be undeniable even in his psychotic state, and so he would be more able to push against the delusional belief.

Needless to say, this is not something that should be done if you haven't talked to the person about it first, and even then, you might not want to do much of anything anyway, beyond what the OP suggests, if you do not feel comfortable dealing with the person in a psychotic state.

 

[idelttoilfsadness21]

I'll never forgive this world for making people lonely even when they're going through a hard time and yet they take away both the experience of existing in peace for some without these problems and forcing them to live in the same breath who are already alone to be in worse critical conditions ever, similar with those with horrible mental impairments or visual ideations. At the end, you'll always be a target, even when they claim they have everything right on our noises. Why did this presentation have to be made? BECAUSE SASU will be more concrete than them. Thank you for this!

 

[wiggy]

Considering the nature of this specific forum section, I think it's morally questionable to engage with people who are actively psychotic. At a minimum, I would ask people to consider if they're divulging any information that could facilitate that person's suicide.