Help Fixating on the hallucinations

[QteStimBnnuy]

Seems to be increasing a little more in the past few days than usual. I'm trying to work off and do my thing at my desk, but there's just this thing across from me staring and watching me intently again. It's generally a struggle to ignore it and grows fixation in my mind to where I have to stop what I'm doing just to watch it, to make it less.. Evil? or calm it down at the very least. I know it's not real, but it's just something your brain can't avoid. It doesn't really help I have noises distracting me that aren't there either, disallowing the chance for me to get so focused I forget it exists or don't notice its effects

I've experienced a lot of variations of things over my life, but I've never really found a way to stop it when it's most present. Does anyone have any experience with similar hallucination fixations, or a consistent method to take your mind off of it to escape it causing issues or potential paranoia every 3-300 seconds? *not even just in this particular situation, but anywhere that involves hallucination and a fixation on it

 

[GuessWhosBack]

It's great that you know it's not real. Are you currently taking any medications, and are hallucinations a relatively new phenomenon for you?

I've experienced a lot of variations of things over my life, but I've never really found a way to stop it when it's most present.

This is in reference to the hallucinations right? Making sure I understand.

 

[QteStimBnnuy]

It's great that you know it's not real. Are you currently taking any medications, and are hallucinations a relatively new phenomenon for you?

I used to be on risperidone, but I've gotten off it due to long term concerns and the bonus concerns of the fact my pharmacy just straight up denied me my meds because they were too lazy to make it. Legit just marked it of as "already recieved for the month" when they got the dosage change note from my psychiatrist

I've improved a lot on them than I was pre meds, which I've learned how to handle and carry over dealing with these and other related issues. However, as given that I've posted; it's not a flawless victory. I consider the fixation part the only real thing left in terms of hallucination issues, if it was gone completely- or at least die down a little, I can accept whatever is there completely. So I was wondering if anyone has experience dealing with that aspect or getting rid of it. I'm sure I can do it with a little time, just would be nice to have a more effective idea that'll make it sooner. Or at least a temporary solution. Obviously if it gets a lot worse I will consider meds again

are hallucinations a relatively new phenomenon for you

No, I've had the issues since I was probably an earlier-mid teen. There is question to it being a thing before 10-11, but I don't think much on it as its not going to change anything

Forgot to mention, but yeah hallucinations* Not thinking all too clearly at the moment

 

[GuessWhosBack]

So I was wondering if anyone has experience dealing with that aspect or getting rid of it. I'm sure I can do it with a little time, just would be nice to have a more effective idea that'll make it sooner.

I did have hallucinations, but they were while I was on antipsychotics administered as mood stabilizers. Mine went away after I stopped, so I don't have much advice in this regard.

No, I've had the issues since I was probably an earlier-mid teen. There is question to it being a thing before 10-11, but I don't think much on it as its not going to change anything

This sounds hard to deal with. Do you currently have a support network?

 

[QteStimBnnuy]

Mine went away after I stopped,

Great you got that figured out. What were the hallucinations to you? Find it interesting hearing others experiences

This sounds hard to deal with. Do you currently have a support network?

Not officially outside of psychiatry and psychology, but I consider my online friends generally good support- although they don't experience the same things. They may be one of the main reasons I can deal with delusions that I have and other things, which can also help in these areas

*also not sure if it's your thing, but I recall Quantum by Manjit Kumar being a nice book if that's your thing. Just for the recommendation, one that came to mind

 

[GuessWhosBack]

Great you got that figured out. What were the hallucinations to you? Find it interesting hearing others experiences

Most frequently I would hear a lot of random, incomprehensible sounds, as if listening to someone speak English but the accent is all wrong and broken. On rare occasions they would be comprehensible, but in that case they would always be nonsensical and actually sometimes funny, nothing like the typical description of "voices speaking to me".

I had a few visual hallucinations, but they were few and far between - they were by far not easy to deal with for me.
I knew none of my hallucinations were real, though, so that helped keep me grounded.
So far I've never had any further experiences since stopping meds.
Then again, not everyone responds the same way.

*also not sure if it's your thing, but I recall Quantum by Manjit Kumar being a nice book if that's your thing. Just for the recommendation, one that came to mind

Thank you, I'll add it to the list <3

 

[QteStimBnnuy]

On rare occasions they would be comprehensible, but they were always nonsensical and actually sometimes funny, nothing like the typical description of "voices speaking to me".

Ngl found myself laughing at things when dealing with it sometimes in the past. Thanks for sharing
Yeah can usually end up being nonsense at least half the time, or "just out of reach" type of deal. If it's not being all that serious or an issue- even if I don't fully hear exactly what something is or what is being said, I can still make jokes like "(((they))) are trying to tell me something". Maybe make an extention if I can put it in context of what I'm doing, if I can use my prediction abilites in some hobbies with friends ect

I knew none of my hallucinations were real, though, so that helped keep me grounded.

Suppose at least you caught on with that, it's the best tool one has along side humour

 

[Mirrory Me]

What thing is watching you? An evil eye?

 

[QteStimBnnuy]

What thing is watching you? An evil eye?

I've been trying to describe its exacts but its taking a lot of time trying to get how it appears to me (*not just visually) since it's the first time I've tried. So I'll die it down a little with a general description

It's body kind of reminds me of some sort of potato sack, just scaled in size- and not blocky*. It's pitch black mostly, has some demonic smiling type of mask that doesn't feel or seem like it's from this world, which sounds odd to say. The mask can "glow" at times, almost similar to the body but less "glow". Almost like it's "radiating" into existence further. Can still glow a bit looking at it, but it increases potentially by double or triple if it's in peripherals at times; which I assume is just typical peripherals work that comes from not being able to ignore it, so I keep my eye on it ect. Or at least how I try to explain it as
Aside from its very presence, the glowing of sorts is an addition to the feel its getting angry or forcing its way at me

The pitch black theme is common to me, even if the presence I feel isn't one I see. Don't really remember when things weren't black
*Suppose now that I think about it. This one is probably the most unique one compared to what is generally expected. At least for me

 

[Mirrory Me]

I've been trying to describe its exacts but its taking a lot of time trying to get how it appears to me (*not just visually) since it's the first time I've tried. So I'll die it down a little with a general description

It's body kind of reminds me of some sort of potato sack, just scaled in size- and not blocky*. It's pitch black mostly, has some demonic smiling type of mask that doesn't feel or seem like it's from this world, which sounds odd to say. The mask can "glow" at times, almost similar to the body but less "glow". Almost like it's "radiating" into existence further. Can still glow a bit looking at it, but it increases potentially by double or triple if it's in peripherals at times; which I assume is just typical peripherals work that comes from not being able to ignore it, so I keep my eye on it ect. Or at least how I try to explain it as
Aside from its very presence, the glowing of sorts is an addition to the feel its getting angry or forcing its way at me

The pitch black theme is common to me, even if the presence I feel isn't one I see. Don't really remember when things weren't black
*Suppose now that I think about it. This one is probably the most unique one compared to what is generally expected. At least for me

That's interesting. Would rather believe it's a demon who is trying to trick/harass you- they love to confuse us so we would lose our shit.

 

[QteStimBnnuy]

That's interesting. Would rather believe it's a demon who is trying to trick/harass you- they love to confuse us so we would lose our shit.

Funny to think, given by the past I've been called a demon and my name kinda refers to as such. Perhaps it's simply a long brother trying to communicate or bring me back

Though perhaps if I try find reason like that as a form of play/handling, I'll start getting called more delusional than usual and recommended for help kek

 

[Mirrory Me]

Funny to think, given by the past I've been called a demon and my name kinda refers to as such. Perhaps it's simply a long brother trying to communicate or bring me back

Though perhaps if I try find reason like that as a form of play/handling, I'll start getting called more delusional than usual and recommended for help kek

It seems trying to steal your soul, or that's how it works. Don't get too crazy- try rather listen to yourself.