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cobe47
New Member
- Aug 22, 2024
- 2
I plan to CTB tomorrow night. I expected myself to feel some kind of clarity in my last couple days alive. I thought I'd enjoy all the beauties of this world I wasn't able to live in. I thought everything would slow down and I'd feel at peace, but instead I feel nothing. There's no feeling of release, these last days have just felt regular, just continuously remembering everything that's pushed me to this point. It really sucks. I don't know if this feeling that I'm dreaming of will come as I put the noose around my neck, or if it'll even come at all.
I know it doesn't even really matter. I know the true feeling of peace will come as I pass away from this world, but I still want some romanticised conclusive feeling as I do it. I don't want it to feel like I'm just putting a rope around my neck then passing out. Does this feeling ever come?
I know it doesn't even really matter. I know the true feeling of peace will come as I pass away from this world, but I still want some romanticised conclusive feeling as I do it. I don't want it to feel like I'm just putting a rope around my neck then passing out. Does this feeling ever come?