Story Feeling like a ton of weight lifted

[Readytogo#Broken]

Don't know about others, but just thought I'd share my thoughts, I was feeling immense pressure to ctb quickly after NYE, fears stopped me with chosen method hanging, long story short, have my SN dispatched, and now knowing I'll hopefully have that peaceful choice, in my hands to make my descision....it's the most calm and at peace iv felt in months, prob no real reason to write this just to say, it doesn't have to be an impulse ill prepared act, I feel so at peace and such a weight lifted, just to know that door will be accessible and relatively easy, also easier on family finding me, it has given me the strength to go through past few days with less pain and stress. I can't thank those caring souls on here enough!! Been more help than any doc shrink iv ever encountered, not a pro suicide forum a pro choice but also....so much support in either descision! Wish you all love peace and success in life or beyond. And again thank you for helping me to take time to resource and take a calm measured approach to things. Amazing group Amazing people

 

[Alec]

You seem like a very beautiful soul, I'm sorry you are in this situation, but for whatever it's worth I'm with you! I hope that you know that you are not alone, whatever decision you will make

 

[Sensei]

If only you knew how reassuring that is to hear. I hope this is an opening for you, a chance to begin a new life. Take care.

 

[hatelife]

I hope u find peace wherever u decide u want to be, here on earth or the other side :) u are a lovely person

 

[Readytogo#Broken]

Thank you so much, I feel so much better deffo not fixed as they'd say, but like knowing that options going to be there and don't have to dive into a messy exit it's given me strength, I hope can give some of it to you guys,

 

[BlueWidow]

Thank you so much, I feel so much better deffo not fixed as they'd say, but like knowing that options going to be there and don't have to dive into a messy exit it's given me strength, I hope can give some of it to you guys, ❤❤

You are such a kind soul. I'm happy to hear that you are feeling less burdened now. It is such a relief to have found a method that you feel certain of and are at peace with. I felt the same way about SN.
And you are right. I've had two experiences that I would consider to be close to miracles in my life.
The first is meeting my husband, and the second is finding this forum and all of the wonderful people on it.
Again, so happy you're feeling a little better. It's always nice to have some good news on here every once in a while.

 

[Readytogo#Broken]

You are such a kind soul. I'm happy to hear that you are feeling less burdened now. It is such a relief to have found a method that you feel certain of and are at peace with. I felt the same way about SN.
And you are right. I've had two experiences that I would consider to be close to miracles in my life.
The first is meeting my husband, and the second is finding this forum and all of the wonderful people on it.
Again, so happy you're feeling a little better. It's always nice to have some good news on here every once in a while.

Bless you, but I'm no kinder than anyone else on here has been to me, fuck I wish everyone here could have everything they deserve, honestly for all our tortured souls the empathy here is unreal, crazy that the best of humankind's ended up here :-( I truely wish you peace strength and love Thank you so much I'm here for a while yet

If only you knew how reassuring that is to hear. I hope this is an opening for you, a chance to begin a new life. Take care.

Thank you so much for the caring words, truely hope others find strength in either descision

I hope u find peace wherever u decide u want to be, here on earth or the other side :) u are a lovely person

Thank you so much for the caring words and thoughts I hope you have some peace in life ryt now sending strength lv and

You seem like a very beautiful soul, I'm sorry you are in this situation, but for whatever it's worth I'm with you! I hope that you know that you are not alone, whatever decision you will make❤

Thank you mate truely means a lot, we're in this all together that's one of the best things about this forum being able to talk without fear of being carted away to a nuthouse it's truely a forum of caring compassionate souls who I wish had been dealt a better hand in life, but also respect everyone's reasons, all in this together Peace to you mate

 

[AlreadyGone]

I know the feeling. Once you have SN in your hands, you will feel like a burden is lifted. You are now in control of when and where you choose to CTB as the option is there. You no longer have to feel impulsive and can plan everything out and go when you are comfortable going. I am happy to hear that you changed your mind and decided to go with a peaceful method.

 

[TheOA]

Hearing you say how this forum has helped you in ways that counseling or therapy could not is testimony to the power of authentic connection. That connection doesn't always fit our ideas of what or who it should be but when it is genuine is is the source of true peace. Know you are loved.

 

[Skyview]

Don't know about others, but just thought I'd share my thoughts, I was feeling immense pressure to ctb quickly after NYE, fears stopped me with chosen method hanging, long story short, have my SN dispatched, and now knowing I'll hopefully have that peaceful choice, in my hands to make my descision....it's the most calm and at peace iv felt in months, prob no real reason to write this just to say, it doesn't have to be an impulse ill prepared act, I feel so at peace and such a weight lifted, just to know that door will be accessible and relatively easy, also easier on family finding me, it has given me the strength to go through past few days with less pain and stress. I can't thank those caring souls on here enough!! Been more help than any doc shrink iv ever encountered, not a pro suicide forum a pro choice but also....so much support in either descision! Wish you all love peace and success in life or beyond. And again thank you for helping me to take time to resource and take a calm measured approach to things. Amazing group Amazing people ❤❤

Just wanted to say that I'm so happy for you , you stayed around and looked at various methods and by doing so you found some peace within you . Don't stop believing in yourself

 

[Daffodil]

I'm glad you're feeling good about your decision. I find a lot of peace in planning things out and talking things out w people here. It really confirms whether it's the right choice or not. I think we should feel good, even excited, about our decision. You mentioned family finding you, and if you hadn't already, I would consider moving your last night to a hotel. I imagine myself leaving a note to the cleaning people not to come in and to call 911. That way no one who's not a professional has to come in. Your family sees you when you are already cleaned up.

 

[JustVisiting]

@Readytogo#Broken

So glad. We all need the breathing space it gives us. My heart fills fuller reading this from you. This forum has become such a safe place. Love and Peace

 

[Readytogo#Broken]

This forum is a blessing for want of a better word, had such horrific dreams last nyt,if that's what they are called, I feel like I'm already on borrowed time wish so much could donate organs ect to someone needing them, feel selfish in that way, but been putting others before my own health for too long, making my choice while I can, 10years have lived with backing out, "trying to get on with it" not gonna end up letting it get worse, bless you all for the kind words, everyone of you battling your own deamons yet still make time, honestly you guys/this forum represents the best of humanity!!it's easy to talk here without fear of being judged, existing isn't living, I'll do whatever I can to make it easier on family. Thank you guys wishing you all As peaceful a day/night as possible