D
dimgobaith
Member
- Jun 17, 2024
- 71
It's strange, my ctb date is getting closer and I seem to be calmer aboug everything.
I've cried less and smiled more, ive managed to get everyone to think I'm
carrying on as normal ( I think).
Is it weird I'm even a little excited about it? I'll hopefully be warm, listening to or watching a favourite film, had some good food and hopefully slip away peacefully.
I kind of hope it's a clear night and I can face the window and see the stars.
I have my place, my method, my date and now that I do I seem to have accepted everything. The panic attacks about life have gone mostly away for now.
Anyone else feel more level once everything has been settled?
The situation I need to ctb to solve will never go away so it's not that I've found a reason to live
I've cried less and smiled more, ive managed to get everyone to think I'm
carrying on as normal ( I think).
Is it weird I'm even a little excited about it? I'll hopefully be warm, listening to or watching a favourite film, had some good food and hopefully slip away peacefully.
I kind of hope it's a clear night and I can face the window and see the stars.
I have my place, my method, my date and now that I do I seem to have accepted everything. The panic attacks about life have gone mostly away for now.
Anyone else feel more level once everything has been settled?
The situation I need to ctb to solve will never go away so it's not that I've found a reason to live