Fear

[a_new_man]

I feel ready to go now and im not scared to now but i have something i want to do first and im gonna have to ctb in december/january but im scared if i wait i wont feel ready.. but i cant miss out on what i want to do its the last thing i wanna do but its just a long wait it feels like everyday gets longer when im waiting to die and its all i can think about. But what if waiting makes death as scary as it used to be? Do i wait until i can do the last thing i wanna do or miss out and just get it done?

 

[missingpeace]

I guess it depends on how badly you want to wait to do the thing you really want.. undoubtedly you will keep having ctb thoughts, will you be strong enough to keep pushing them away, can you supply enough distractions till the time comes..only you can answer that question.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that after all only you can decide what is best, it's a completely personal decision. But anyway, nobody should fear death as it's all that we are destined for and there is no escaping it. I very strongly believe that we just cease to exist after this with not even the awareness of the fact that we are dead.

 

[Stylite]

If you become terrified of CTB and hesitate after whatever you want to do in December/January comes, then it's probably because you changed your mind and found something worth living for. If things remain as bad as they are, your mindset will probably not change. I would say wait, but I don't know much about your situation.