Help fear of old age and death

[Life_and_Death]

these are just a couple of the reasons i want to ctb. some times when i think about it, it just sends me right over the edge to the point that im in tears and watching all the years go by isnt helping at all. is there anyone here that can maybe give me some serious insight into what its like being older?

 

[WornOutLife]

Are you older than me?
I'm 33 and some people say I'm still young but I feel so old!

Anyway, most older people I talk to seem to keep on wanting to live in this world even though they might be HATERS and keep saying stuff such as "The old times were much better. "

I dunno if this helps but it's my personal experience.

As for me, I hate it! 33 years have been more than enough!

 

[Life_and_Death]

Are you older than me?

no im only 21

 

[WornOutLife]

no im only 21

21 is my lucky number! Damn, you're so young!
My best years were my 25-29s lol

 

[Life_and_Death]

My best years were my 25-29s lol

may i ask what made them your best years?

 

[WornOutLife]

may i ask what made them your best years?

Found the love of my life, was in shape, had a decent amount of money, my own car, started living alone for my first time (it was epic), nightclubs every day, etc.

Let's say I partied as hard as it was possible and enjoyed every single moment lol

 

[Makko]

The older you get the better you will understand yourself and your place in the world. The maximalism gradually begins going away and you start seeing nuance in things. I'm not that old myself, but still older than you, and I'm seeing that trajectory. My experience is that it gets easier mentally, not harder.

This answer is pretty vague but so is your question. Just general terms.

 

[enuff]

... anyone here that can maybe give me some serious insight into what its like being older?

seriously wanna know? you' not gonna like this. believe me it don't get any easier. as we age, every day that goes by, our bodies can pick up all kinds of nasty shit like viruses, STD's, cancer, injuries, and weird shit like love, and divorce, and tinnitus, anxiety, aspergers, depression, aches & pains, toothaches, gout, potbelly, blury vision, forgetfulness, and then it gets worse. you lose your job. even worse, you lose your mojo. lol. clothes just don't look good anymore, and dressing in young peoples clothes just looks stupid. going to bars is a fucking disaster, people steer clear of the old troll in the corner. and then it gets worse. grey hair. really, old guys with dyed hair just looks so fake and stupid, and every day of my life i regret things i did or didn't do, and everyday i wish i was successfully ctb all those other times i tried and failed, and the opportunities i missed. then i got to watch as my family & friends died, one by one, and now all my peeps gone, and i'm not gonna make any new friends, i'm too closeted, and agoraphobia keeps me trapped in my house. every time i leave my house it cost me money, so i don't go nowhere. and then there's spending way more than i make, and so debt piles up: car repairs, house repairs, medical bills & pills, food, heat & electric, internet, tv, rent, weed, booze, and addiction to ebay & amzn. and that's just some of it off the top of my head. but as i age, i didn't get any wiser. and i barely learned from the school of hard knocks, because i keep doing stupid shit that i regret soon after. i'm just as stupid now as i ever was. oh fuck this, i'm outta here. let me off this fucking planet, i got to go. now are you glad you asked?

 

[awfullife]

turned 41 today. Life is a degenerative process and gets more and more complicated until you die. That is all. Good luck.

 

[Mentalmick]

Yeah, I'm 47 and I'm fucked.

 

[Amumu]

I'm only 22 and I've been unattractive for most of my life but people say I'm ok now.
So I only fear that I'm going to be completely unattractive soon after putting so much effort in avoiding it.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I should have known better then to ask suicidal people. (and no I'm not talking about everyone that commented)

 

[Lost Magic]

37 here. Feel like I have already lived a decade too long.

 

[sunsetintehwoods]

28 for today. Scared of oldiness so much that I choosed suicide like not worst option for not getting old, but problem isn't in age.
I guess there no insightes about being old because of individuality. I mean, when you can meet bunch of 25yo deadinsided and 60yo pretty young and charged guy with bloody hemorrhoids, prostatitis and hearing aid in the same room, heh.

from other side, oldiness have it's own advantages like crystallization of mind, increased stamina and special sexual experiences.

 

[London2021]

Am 50 something. Honestly can't remember 50 what as you stop counting. The most difficult thing is my mind writes cheques my body can't cash.
On plus side...and stick with me on this....i was physically disabled from my 20s and my mindset ( helped probably by a touch of mania ) was that I could still do things but it just took me longer and I would have to do things differently. So, degenerative painful disease plus interruptions of incidents of spinal danage . I was bloody minded plus had kids so that kept me going in to the divorce years. But looking back best decision EVER made was to start my bucket list young because I knew at this age and at retirement I wouldn't be able to do jack. Some things just dont matter anymore. I get to speak and my work colleagues listen, even when I chat shit. Sometimes I sit in big meetings thinking fuck it going to say what I think since you asked. Weirdly got more confident about my very plain looks and comfortable not wearing make up outside the house ( talking pre covid). Can have unattached sex without the expectations of a relationship as been there done that . Having said that whilst I never want to live with anyone again I do miss hugs - so loneliness is probably the thing that most older ppl feel.

Equality wise we dont seem to moved on one iota so dont wait for that. Disease wise it's a complete dice roll unless you've gone down the smoker or alcohol excess road. I supported the RTD as a young adult because knew my body would fail and would become tolerant to all painkillers so would be in agony.
Realised that life seems to go in 25 yr cycles from trainers to politics so you get deja vu and think you can lecture the young and say ' in my day......'.
Realised I wasn't to blame for abuse suffered as a child and very importantly for me that my mum loved me but was in a coercive relationship so couldn't protect as I needed and wanted. And was as much a victim as I was. For years I couldn't find the right words on this. But from here on in it doesn't get better for me so time up soon I think. I have been physically dependent on others and my needs are significant but just about managing. I dont want to be in a care home. I dont want to be confined to my bed. I dont want to mourn what I could have had because bucket list early approach meant I did things even if I never changed the world.

 

[orlandom]

33