Failed Suicide

[Suicidemyonlyoption]

I'm new here. Just looking over the site. At a distant glance one would think I have a great life. I survived a cancer battle. I had a beautiful 3 year old whom I placed for adoption with the idea that I was going to end my life. I thought it would be unfair to do so with him home with me because he couldn't call 911, prepare food for himself, and I didn't want him to maybe develop bad memory of me dead with him walking around our home. I found a wonderful family and signed all the paper work. I thought it was the safest option for him. Then I overdosed. I guess I arrived at the hospital too late for any reversal or charcoal. Well unfortunately I woke up. And this was August 12, 2019. Now my baby is adopted and I'm still alive. He was my only reason for living. Every single day I woke up for him. Maybe people will think I'm selfish. But the pain I'm in is something that I cannot control. Now everyday since being released from the hospital my life seems even more pointless than before. I'm trying to find a way to end this existence painlessly and quickly. I have a fear of dying alone. I would like to obtain some sort of medicine that I will die quickly. Any suggestions will be great. I don't care how much it costs. I'm done with this life. I've been reading about something called "N" if someone could inbox me and let
Me know what it is and how do I buy it that would be appreciated. At this point there's no going back. I'm done with this life forever.

 

[TiredOfLife95]

Hello and welcome to this forum.
N is an illegal barbiturate (liquid or powdered) that causes a quick and painless death. To have a successful death it's recommended to use an enti-emetic before getting N because it causes vomit.
You have to register to Proton Mail, then send a mail to A telling him you want to buy N. You can find his email in Peaceful Pill Handbook (March 24, 2019) at the page 280. To find Peaceful Pill Handbook you have to go to "List of Resources" in suicide section.
I hope to have been helpful, and sorry for my English but it's not my first language.

 

[Asta]

Welcome, New Member! "Tired" is right - good info. When you've been here one more day and have posted 5 times (I think) you will be able to PM - Private Message - and we can send the same to you.

 

[Suicidemyonlyoption]

Welcome, New Member! "Tired" is right - good info. When you've been here one more day and have posted 5 times (I think) you will be able to PM - Private Message - and we can send the same to you.

Thank you

 

[Soul]

The List of Resources near the top of the forum is full of helpful links. You should check it out to decide which methods are within reach and reasonable for you.

I'm sorry about everything that's led you to this point. (((Hugs)))

 

[Suicidemyonlyoption]

The List of Resources near the top of the forum is full of helpful links. You should check it out to decide which methods are within reach and reasonable for you.

I'm sorry about everything that's led you to this point. (((Hugs)))

Thank you. I have located a vet clinic in Mexico where I can purchase N. I will be driving there it's only 9 hours from me. Thanks to all who replied.

 

[wendydong1]

Thank you. I have located a vet clinic in Mexico where I can purchase N. I will be driving there it's only 9 hours from me. Thanks to all who replied.

Be careful, the lists of vet shops on that handbook may not be accurate or up to date

 

[Sammybackflip]

Hello and welcome to this forum.
N is an illegal barbiturate (liquid or powdered) that causes a quick and painless death. To have a successful death it's recommended to use an enti-emetic before getting N because it causes vomit.
You have to register to Proton Mail, then send a mail to A telling him you want to buy N. You can find his email in Peaceful Pill Handbook (March 24, 2019) at the page 280. To find Peaceful Pill Handbook you have to go to "List of Resources" in suicide section.
I hope to have been helpful, and sorry for my English but it's not my first language.

I may be blind but where is ...."To find Peaceful Pill Handbook you have to go to "List of Resources" in suicide section.

 

[TiredOfLife95]

@Sammybackflip https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/list-of-resources.3/

 

[Girobatol]

I'm new here. Just looking over the site. At a distant glance one would think I have a great life. I survived a cancer battle. I had a beautiful 3 year old whom I placed for adoption with the idea that I was going to end my life. I thought it would be unfair to do so with him home with me because he couldn't call 911, prepare food for himself, and I didn't want him to maybe develop bad memory of me dead with him walking around our home. I found a wonderful family and signed all the paper work. I thought it was the safest option for him. Then I overdosed. I guess I arrived at the hospital too late for any reversal or charcoal. Well unfortunately I woke up. And this was August 12, 2019. Now my baby is adopted and I'm still alive. He was my only reason for living. Every single day I woke up for him. Maybe people will think I'm selfish. But the pain I'm in is something that I cannot control. Now everyday since being released from the hospital my life seems even more pointless than before. I'm trying to find a way to end this existence painlessly and quickly. I have a fear of dying alone. I would like to obtain some sort of medicine that I will die quickly. Any suggestions will be great. I don't care how much it costs. I'm done with this life. I've been reading about something called "N" if someone could inbox me and let
Me know what it is and how do I buy it that would be appreciated. At this point there's no going back. I'm done with this life forever.

Sad story. I killed my cats (pentobarbital) because I have mental disease and want to kill myself. I didn´t want cats go homeless and no one adopted them. Now I am without cats and lack a good spot to hung myself.

 

[Sammybackflip]

@Sammybackflip https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/list-of-resources.3/

thanks

 

[Suicidemyonlyoption]

Be careful, the lists of vet shops on that handbook may not be accurate or up to date

I'm pretty fluent in Spanish and money talks there so it shouldn't be too hard to obtain.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Sorry for everything you have been through. I hope your plan works and you can find peace.

 

[azucaramargo]

I'm pretty fluent in Spanish and money talks there so it shouldn't be too hard to obtain.

Remember, it's for your animals (when you're hunting around for the stuff).

 

[Soul]

@Suicidemyonlyoption, I feel you should read about some members' efforts to buy N in Mexico. @Alchemist seems to know what terms to put in the search gizmo to find relevant threads. I tried "Mexico nembutal" with mixed (but possibly worthwhile) results.

Be careful. Again, I'm sorry about everything that's led you to this.