LostMyWill
Member
- Nov 22, 2019
- 40
I was so done, I couldn't wait any longer, so I went for partial hanging.
I tied the "rope" (bathrobe belt) to my closet's hanging rod with a clove hitch knot and put the hangman's noose around my neck, pressed it firmly into place then suspended myself.
I quickly fainted at first, but after a while woke up blind with extreme chest pain and a huge headache, and because of my survival instinct, I hastily reached to the ligament around my neck, I couldn't see, hear or feel anything, I didn't even know if what I was touching (or rather, blocking my hands) was actually the noose or the pole. Eventually, after struggling, I untied the clove hitch knot, yet the hangman's noose remained firmly pressed against my neck, I couldn't stop panicking. After a while, I finally got it off of my neck, but I could still barely feel/see/hear anything, felt so freaking dizzy/nauseous, and it took me awfully a long time to realize I had also urinated (even though I made triple sure to empty my bladder). I also checked my blood pressure with a monitor and it showed 80 SYS (normal is 120) and 55 DIA (normal is 80).
This fucking sucks so bad, I wish I hadn't reacted to my SI and just endured it for a little longer. I'm already back to full health after resting for about 6 hours.
At this point, I'll just go for full suspension or even long drop (don't care if it decapitates me). Just to ensure that my survival instinct doesn't screw it up.
I tied the "rope" (bathrobe belt) to my closet's hanging rod with a clove hitch knot and put the hangman's noose around my neck, pressed it firmly into place then suspended myself.
I quickly fainted at first, but after a while woke up blind with extreme chest pain and a huge headache, and because of my survival instinct, I hastily reached to the ligament around my neck, I couldn't see, hear or feel anything, I didn't even know if what I was touching (or rather, blocking my hands) was actually the noose or the pole. Eventually, after struggling, I untied the clove hitch knot, yet the hangman's noose remained firmly pressed against my neck, I couldn't stop panicking. After a while, I finally got it off of my neck, but I could still barely feel/see/hear anything, felt so freaking dizzy/nauseous, and it took me awfully a long time to realize I had also urinated (even though I made triple sure to empty my bladder). I also checked my blood pressure with a monitor and it showed 80 SYS (normal is 120) and 55 DIA (normal is 80).
This fucking sucks so bad, I wish I hadn't reacted to my SI and just endured it for a little longer. I'm already back to full health after resting for about 6 hours.
At this point, I'll just go for full suspension or even long drop (don't care if it decapitates me). Just to ensure that my survival instinct doesn't screw it up.