Discussion Experiences with Suicide Hotlines?

[MattersOfTheHeart]

Do any of y'all have some experiences with Suicide Hotlines that you found memorable or significant, whether in a negative or positive way? Do the operator make you feel better or worse? My experiences have been mostly positive, but my most recent one was mixed. My most recent one is so far the only one I've made regarding the situation I'm currently wanting to die over. The lady validated my feelings and all, but she also tried to talk me into not having my hope for the future zeroed in on me reconciling with the man I love. I told her that my hope is totally based on that and that if that doesn't happen I can never be happy again and intend to give up on life. But she still tried to tell me that I should be happy regardless of the outcome of my situation. I politely told her that hearing that made me feel even worse. She did totally understand that, she claimed. But she was a bit patronizing at times. I know she meant well though and I could tell she cared. I guess she just didn't fully understand and appreciate true love the way that I do. But she gave me lots of compliments too which I liked. Even though the experience overall wasn't TOTALLY bad, it's still made me hesitant to try calling again. What if the operator I get just says similar stuff? Idk, maybe it's worth a try. Maybe next time I'll get someone who understands and appreciates true love the way that I do, and can empathise with me better.

 

[worldexploder]

I drunk dialed a suicide hotline a couple years ago. I wanted to talk to them about my right to die. The dude seemed like a douche who wanted me off the phone. Told him how my life sucked. He asked me if I am planning to do it tonight I said no. Something like that. He suggested that I get some sleep.

 

[MattersOfTheHeart]

I drunk dialed a suicide hotline a couple years ago. I wanted to talk to them about my right to die. The dude seemed like a douche who wanted me off the phone. Told him how my life sucked. He asked me if I am planning to do it tonight I said no. Something like that. He suggested that I get some sleep.

Dang, sorry to hear you had that experience! Based on stories like this that I'm hearing, they seriously need to raise their standards for the people they hire.

 

[Schopenhauer]

I wonder what makes someone want to work in a suicide hotline. Aren't there better causes to work for? Such as helping people who actually want to live?

 

[MattersOfTheHeart]

I wonder what makes someone want to work in a suicide hotline. Aren't there better causes to work for? Such as helping people who actually want to live?

They're well intentioned, I suppose. They think they're saving lives. And I mean, sometimes people DO have positive experiences with them. But I do also totally see where you're coming from too.

 

[worldexploder]

Dang, sorry to hear you had that experience! Based on stories like this that I'm hearing, they seriously need to raise their standards for the people they hire.

Thanks. In my opinion, these operators probably enjoy the drama or get a power trip off "saving" someone's life. We need a god damn right to die hotline to balance things out.

 

[MattersOfTheHeart]

Thanks. In my opinion, these operators probably enjoy the drama or get a power trip off "saving" someone's life. We need a god damn right to die hotline to balance things out.

That would definitely be good too. What exactly do you imagine that would entail though? People giving advice on methods or something like that?

 

[Schopenhauer]

Thanks. In my opinion, these operators probably enjoy the drama or get a power trip off "saving" someone's life. We need a god damn right to die hotline to balance things out.

Yeah, I get this impression from a lot of pro-lifers. They do it to feel good about themselves, not to help others out. These pro-life assholes wouldn't do anything concrete to help out others in need - just spew their platitudes and curtail our freedoms.

 

[worldexploder]

Yeah, I get this impression from a lot of pro-lifers. They do it to feel good about themselves, not to help others out. These pro-life assholes wouldn't do anything concrete to help out others in need - just spew their platitudes and curtail our freedoms.

Exactly. Plus you can't "save" a life anyway....only prolong it. If people would just realize this maybe it would change there perspective some.

 

[MattersOfTheHeart]

Goodness, I suppose y'all are just more cynical than I am. Which is totally understandable given the context. I just personally believe that people in general are usually well intentioned and are at the very least half way decent

 

[worldexploder]

That would definitely be good too. What exactly do you imagine that would entail though? People giving advice on methods or something like that?

Giving advice on methods would be great but our "optifascist" society would probably make it illegal. Free speech only applies to pro-lifers it seems.

Also a right to die hotline would be a good place to vent.

 

[Rose]

Goodness, I suppose y'all are just more cynical than I am. Which is totally understandable given the context. I just personally believe that people in general are usually well intentioned and are at the very least half way decent

There are certainly people who do this sort of stuff just to feel good about themselves and/or brag about it, I'll admit that. My mother is one of those people, though not with suicide hotlines. She does not care at all for the people she "helps", she cares about people liking her because of it, and because it allows her to hold the idea "I'm better than thou" over others

Other people are well-intentioned, and "kind" people. They are unaware of their cruelty. Most people lack the skills to look at what they are doing, and thinking, and imagine the potential consequences for anyone but themselves realistically. Plenty of pro-lifers are pro-life because that is what they were taught. They were taught that this belief is right, and anyone who thinks otherwise needs help, and isn't thinking straight. So why listen to someone if you "know" they're not thinking straight? It's simple, you don't.

Point is, humans are emotional & simple decision makers. It takes a hell of a lot of work to be able to even partially get through our initial, emotional & illogical reactions to things, and most people don't even realise that they're subject to these instincts. It's not easy, and I completely understand why they think in these weird, illogical, ultimately destructive for humanity as a whole ways.

But I can't forgive them, or call them decent people. It's a right shame that they've grown & were taught to be this way, and that so many people are. the vast majority of people are, in some way. But at this point a lot of them are just cogs in many machines, and happy with it. I'm not happy with the machine, so I can't forgive or tolerate the willing cogs who try to perpetuate it. I'm sad for them, but all of my efforts will go to defending those who are being hurt.

Humans are capable of causing immense pain while they, themselves are entirely convinced they're helping. For them this is kindness. For those that are hurt, this is cruelty.

Edit: sorry, bit of a tangent lmao.
I've never had experience with suicide hotlines personally, but I've known plenty of people who have almost instantly had the cops called on them. I don't trust them thanks to this. It seems like more of a system designed to pull suicidal people into hospitals than to actually. have conversations with them & listen

 

[BaconCheeseburger]

I used to call Samaritans a lot, didn't find them too helpful because they're just there to listen. That's it. No feedback or advice or suggestions. They just listen and interject every now and again with 'ooh that does sound tough' or 'it's understandable you feel this way'. Samaritans also has a text line, but you text them and by the time they reply (with the same response as before) I've usually moved on to other thoughts or gone to sleep because it's late.

 

[Fucking loving it]

I was told that they can call the police. Idk if this is true.

 

[TiredHorse]

they seriously need to raise their standards for the people they hire.

I wonder what makes someone want to work in a suicide hotline.

A friend of mind is getting his advanced degree in therapy. Part of the college's degree requirements for all therapists is doing shifts on the suicide hotline. So like so many other things, you're dealing with a grad student. Cheap labor.

Yes, they can and do call police and ambulance. They have the usual, "Do you intend to harm yourself?" pro forma questions, and if you answer yes they are required to send in the pro-lifer cavalry. My friend has had to do that a couple times. To his credit, he has not done that to me, even though we have talked openly about my intention to ctb.

 

[Rose]

I was told that they can call the police. Idk if this is true.

They most definitely can, at least in the USA
I've had the police at my house at 3 in the morning after someone else in my family called a suicide hotline. They (the person) were immediately hospitalized

 

[Schopenhauer]

But I can't forgive them, or call them decent people. It's a right shame that they've grown & were taught to be this way, and that so many people are. the vast majority of people are, in some way. But at this point a lot of them are just cogs in many machines, and happy with it. I'm not happy with the machine, so I can't forgive or tolerate the willing cogs who try to perpetuate it. I'm sad for them, but all of my efforts will go to defending those who are being hurt.

That very well said, and I agree entirely with the sentiment.

 

[OthelloToOblivion]

I have used the online IM lines with beyond blue (Aussie, what's up). The first time I used it I entered my real phone number, a requirement for the chat, and said that I intended to die before 25, and didn't see why it couldn't be that night (turns out being so tired and exhausted from untreated but diagnosed depression also means you can't be bothered to ctb). they immediately terminated the chat and called me, which I answered. they said they were worried about my mental health and wanted to send out a team to take care of me. I hung up. Since then, I have actually found them quite helpful, as long as you enter a random number (sorry to whoever it is, but once it's wrong number , the company can't do shit). I've found that doing that means you get the listening but without the risk of hospitalisation.

 

[Threads]

In my younger years, I enjoyed using skype and prank calling the suicide hotline with friends.

It was very juvenile.

 

[kkatt]

Just something to bear in mind
Ted Bundy worked for a suicide hotline
Maybe you have to have a certain interest

 

[Jen Erik]

"Sir, are you actually suicidal? There are other people waiting, so we are going to terminate the call now."

That's my experience with a suicide hotline. Fucking joke.

But I guess it worked? I was too enraged by that bullshit to do anything.

 

[MattersOfTheHeart]

Just something to bear in mind
Ted Bundy worked for a suicide hotline
Maybe you have to have a certain interest

Whoa, he did? That's super creepy. Thanks for the paranoia fuel xD

 

[kkatt]

From wikipedia:

"In mid-1970, Bundy was now focused and goal oriented, and he re-enrolled at UW, this time as a psychology major. He became an honor student and was well regarded by his professors.[45] In 1971, he took a job at Seattle's Suicide Hotline Crisis Center, where he met and worked alongside Ann Rule. Rule was a former Seattle police officer and aspiring crime writer who would later write one of the definitive Bundy biographies, The Stranger Beside Me. She saw nothing disturbing in Bundy's personality at the time and described him as "kind, solicitous, and empathetic".[46]"

 

[Trashcan]

Usually they just say things like, "it sounds like you're suffering." Then one time I mentioned I wanted to overdose and they called the police.

 

[TAW122]

Personally, I've never called one, but I would not recommend ever calling one. This is because they can trace your phone number, location, and even send authorities to your place. Also, the whole confidential bullshit is a lie (I know everyone has different experiences, but still it's very risky). This is one such example of what could happen and the damage is just immense. Plus the operators aren't even held responsible, the person calling gets treated like shit with no rights and then forced to pay for the unwanted treatment.

Thanks. In my opinion, these operators probably enjoy the drama or get a power trip off "saving" someone's life. We need a god damn right to die hotline to balance things out.

Yes, indeed and such a hotline should respect the right to die and not alert authorities if the person is only harming/a threat to themselves (the exception being if the person was threatening others' life or a danger to others).

Yeah, I get this impression from a lot of pro-lifers. They do it to feel good about themselves, not to help others out. These pro-life assholes wouldn't do anything concrete to help out others in need - just spew their platitudes and curtail our freedoms.

Yeah that's pretty much what the majority of them do, very rarely is there ever a genuine pro-life who would want to do something concrete, though they still violate the person's free will by imposing life on them.

@Rose I agree with you and what you wrote is spot on.