Venting Existence causes nothing but suffering

[FuneralCry]

There truly is only suffering in existing, it's the most terrible, dreadful tragedy how life even exists at all. To exist means to suffer so unnecessarily all while risking experiencing way worse suffering at any moment, it terrifies me how there is the potential to suffer to unlimited amounts in this existence, it disturbs me how one can feel such immense agony yet not die.

Existence itself truly is nothing more than an unnecessary harm, having the ability to exist really is the most hellish imposistion that serves no function but to torment existing beings all while they are destined for nothing but to deteriorate and die anyway. I find it so disgusting how humans choose to impose potentially decades of meaningless torment onto others, it's truly so horrific the amount of suffering they cause by procreating, more than anything I wish I never existed. There's nothing desirable about being conscious and aware, all that appeals to me is the peace of an eternal, dreamless sleep where all is finally forgotten about. Existing really is just pointless suffering and I don't want to suffer in any way, rather I just wish for permanent nothingness.

 

[Leiden]

The pattern of my life has been that it just keeps getting worse. I just keep getting knocked down harder and harder than the last tme. I'm now in such a state that I just can't survive this anymore but there's no way out. Any option out seems terrifying now that the gold standard is gone. I suffer so much and reality is that I'm going to suffer so, so much more with no way out. There truly is no end to the amount of suffering that can happen to us. I just want to never of existed at all. I don't know how to function anymore, I don't know how to handle all of the many, many, many things that I am going through every second of the day and it just gets worse. It's become way too much for me to bare. To exist is to suffer and suffer more and suffer even more and that never ends. I agree with everything that you say. The one thing I'm not sure of 100% is what happens to us when we die. I do wish so badly to just not exist at all, like before we were born.

 

[All_is_in_vanity]

I know you don't believe in god but I simply can't understand how you don't believe in some evil deity creator. Every time I read your posts I think "evil god". It's the only thing that makes any sense to me. God must be evil because no hell like this could be random.

 

[MarkSmith73]

Life is hell and almost unimaginably hard. It's that way so we can truly learn. I can't answer 100% why suffering is such an integral part of our existence. But it is. This isn't a pro-life post and I down around a fifth a day along with some heavy duty sleeping pills at night to cope. For people who get through this life with no booze or comfort meds you have my utmost admiration. Personally I've had some answered prayers but from my overall lifetime experience this earth is like being in a foxhole in a warzone without a radio. All that being said, there is hope. Just maybe not here.