I posted another thread regarding this but I haven't received any responses yet. I've struggled with depression for years, since I was a kid. I've always been pretty quiet and it basically stems from me having difficulty in generating thoughts/ideas/words to be able to participate in a real conversation. I can talk but things are just very brief on my part. There's other issues such as me not having a strong sense of self, lack of motivation, memory issues, etc. I've been through tons of therapy but therapists have never pinpointed how my low self esteem started. I just always thought my problems were genetic and due to a chemical imbalance. Medication really hasn't helped me at all and I've been really thinking about catching the last bus lately. I even purchased some SN to have on hand just in case I do pull the trigger. In my last ditch effort to try and help myself, I've been searching on the internet for reasons why I might be the way that I am. I came across some articles about the impacts of excessive television on the brain and BINGO! It all makes sense! I watched a ton of TV as a kid, as did my dad. I don't recall my parents having real conversations with me or even amongst themselves. It was a pretty quiet house. So after reading some things about television addiction, I honestly believe that my brain did not develop sufficiently in the area that controls expressive language and other things that I struggle with. I'm happy that I might have finally found the answer but I am extremely isolated and am afraid that I can't pull myself out of this deep dark hole. The one thing that may have caused all this misery in my life is now a major addiction. I watch TV at all hours of the day and I have a hard time pulling myself away from it. I'm just going deeper and deeper into a very dark hole. I need help in tackling this addiction but I'm all alone and don't know what to do. Do I try hypnosis first to try and end this addiction? Or do I tackle my underdeveloped brain and look for help with the skills that I never gained as a child? I really doubt that seeing someone once a week will help me and wonder if there's an actual program instead. Do I have the money for something intensive? Nope but it would just be nice to know if help is a possibility. So if you have any suggestions, I'd really appreciate them. Thanks.
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TV usage as kids and also gaming are both major factors why people kill themselves later on. For sure.
This guy below in the video talks about exactly this you are speaking about, how the brain adapts and changes to gaming etc
This guy below in the video talks about exactly this you are speaking about, how the brain adapts and changes to gaming etc
So I'm about halfway through the video. Did he offer any advice on what to do? He mentioned 12 steps but I don't even know if they offer that for electronic addictions. And then he mentioned it taking years to recover?
I barely have the emotional strength to keep going for another few months let alone years. 
I'm doing a treatment right now called TMS that is basically magnetic stimulation to try to develop the parts of the brain that are underdeveloped in people with treatment resistant depression.
It's often covered by insurance, if you have that. Might be worth looking into. I haven't been doing it for long enough to see if it works for me yet.
I'm sorry about your lonely childhood and the ongoing effects it's had on you.
It's often covered by insurance, if you have that. Might be worth looking into. I haven't been doing it for long enough to see if it works for me yet.
I'm sorry about your lonely childhood and the ongoing effects it's had on you.
Thank you so much for that suggestion and I'm definitely going to look into that. :) I really wish you all the best with your treatment and my thoughts are with you. Big hugs!
Ch92921
The call of the void
- Dec 29, 2018
- 909
I found an at home TMS device and I'm going to try it out. It should be arriving in a couple of days. Fingers crossed that it helps.
He says in the threadstart .. lol :D
"TMS = that is basically magnetic stimulation to try to develop the parts of the brain that are underdeveloped in people with treatment resistant depression."
Good luck! Just be aware that at home TMS devices haven't been though the same testing and can't necessarily make the same claims as doctor-administered TMS.
Yeah, I know it's not going to be the same as it being administered by a professional but I'm desperate.
So how does that work? Do you get that therapy at a doctor? Is it electro shock or something similar?
It's kind of like a less invasive ECT. You get it at a TMS clinic where they gave the specialized magnet chair thing. My psychiatrist referred me to a place.
Idk if it works for me, I just started it. Apparently it works for a lot of people. Idk about OCD. Try searching for a clinic in your area.
Hiow's your treatment going? I've been using an at home device and today I seemed to feel a little better. I don't know if it has anything to do with the little machine or not. I'm hoping it is.
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