Help Excessive anger

[onthelastday]

In 2019 I started to feel an uncontrollable rage, anger at myself, at life, and everything, just hatred, my face had no expression at all, it lasted almost 4 months, with periods of less hatred and VERY hatred, I even thought about doing atrocities, killing people, I wanted at any cost to cause a lot of pain and hurt many people. I remember crying with so much hate, can anyone relate to that? I'm not diagnosing myself but sometimes I think I have bipolar disorder: /

 

[BlankUser]

When I have a horrible OCD attack and mess up my compulsions I sometimes start hitting/throwing things. I broke a chair not so long ago, punched tables multiple times, kicked a fridge etc. I realise that I need to stop destroying things, so I'm able to control myself better now. But instead of breaking things now I hit myself often. I punched myself so hard I had a black eye several times. What a bitch. I hate my existence.

 

[yive]

i think it's okay to "hate everything" when you're in a torturous environment

 

[FuneralCry]

I think I did as a teenager. Probably not that extreme though. I just felt frustrated at my life situation and was under extreme stress. I have always had the personality where I get stressed when things don't go exactly my way. I feel mostly devoid of emotion now though. I hope you find some relief, it really is awful.

 

[WornOutLife]

Yes, hatred, basically towards my ex classmates, used to consume me.
Later on, I realized that there's no point in hating them. They just suck and will never change and doing any kind of harm to them or killing them would only turn me into a worse person than them so, no, thanks.

Whenever I get a hater or somebody who wants just to make me go mad, I usually ignore them and if I answer, I just tell them why he/she is wrong and wish them a nice day lol.

 

[onthelastday]

i think it's okay to "hate everything" when you're in a torturous environment

it was something so intense and violent that I can't describe it

 

[stillweary]

Someone once told me that anger is basically just depression coming from a more confident, empowered place. I am depressed far more often than I am angry, but the one time I permitted myself to fully feel my anger, I destroyed my apartment, punched out a glass light bulb with my bare hands, and set myself on fire. I feel betrayed at the core of my being by God and by the universe itself.

Depressed ideas get scary when you're angry. The only thing life ever really taught me is that there is no relationship between action and consequence.

 

[S like suicide]

But instead of breaking things now I hit myself often. I punched myself so hard I had a black eye several times. What a bitch. I hate my existence.

I feel you...:( :(

 

[PlushieLover]

I feel related to you. Thinking that one day you can lose control and actually hurt someone is scary. What do you do to calm down?

 

[I'm scared]

I have no diagnosis apart from an eating disorder.I have extreme anger hatred against a teacher, Camhs which is probably fair enough.My latest thoughts while sitting on my bed all day is that if I had time to poke one of them with a knife,which one as as soon as they saw me they would know I was there for revenge.I go from crying apathy to rage ,I smash controllers,I diid hit myself and last year started to cut my arms, anything to try and cope with my pain and complete rage at not being able to help someone.I would say I am full of hatred for almost everything most of all myself

 

[onthelastday]

I feel related to you. Thinking that one day you can lose control and actually hurt someone is scary. What do you do to calm down?

I just tried to release bad thoughts to feel like a better person, but I hurt myself, I hit my head so hard on a mirror, I pierced my door with scissors, I hurt myself with a stapler, I hit my head against the wall, now I just I feel so empty, without hatred, just empty

 

[saltshaker]

I've been there before, when you're ready to just burn it all down. When your hatred for everyone and everything seems maxed the fuck out, and you're about to start causing chaos. When "conventional" levels of violence just won't satisfy you.

It will hopefully pass for you, as it did for me. Try not to end up in prison in the mean time. If you're going to really hurt someone just hurt yourself instead, or dive into drugs/alcohol, or destroy something that isn't alive please.

 

[LONE WOLF.]

I spend 5 days out of 7 a week in a state of intense Anger and Rage, certain types of people make me want to do violent things that would have me put away,l'm so grateful for my medication which calms me down and for having the responsibility to my dog which always stops me in my tracks! Roll on ctb time!

 

[saltshaker]

*pulls out a guitar
Don't put on that vest my friend,
don't drive through the mall screaming "this is the end!".
Don't go shoot up your old highschool,
it was 10 years ago, that isn't cool.
Don't stalk you old boss, even though he's a cunt.
Don't open him up and bathe in his blood.
Don't go ordering a pressure cooker,
just smoke some weed maybe order a hooker.


That was my song about bad thoughts, I hope you all enjoyed it. Don't do it OP, for real, find another outlet.

 

[onthelastday]

*pulls out a guitar
Don't put on that vest my friend,
don't drive through the mall screaming "this is the end!".
Don't go shoot up your old highschool,
it was 10 years ago, that isn't cool.
Don't stalk you old boss, even though he's a cunt.
Don't open him up and bathe in his blood.
Don't go ordering a pressure cooker,
just smoke some weed maybe order a hooker.


That was my song about bad thoughts, I hope you all enjoyed it. Don't do it OP, for real, find another outlet.

WOW, TALENT…

 

[saltshaker]

WOW, TALENT…

ty ty :)