Venting everything is gone, im doing it today.

[ComradeJas]

everyone left, nobody even gives a shit. I just needed support, my friends left because they didn't want someone who wanted to die near them, my SO lied and cheated on me, then also left.
i dont even like this, the only thing i have is a kitchen knife now.
I'll do everything I can to die tonight.

 

[Lmd]

what happened? vent here. Don't do any risky that will probably cause more pain to you

 

[tidalwxves]

everyone left, nobody even gives a shit. I just needed support, my friends left because they didn't want someone who wanted to die near them, my SO lied and cheated on me, then also left.
i dont even like this, the only thing i have is a kitchen knife now.
I'll do everything I can to die tonight.

Please be careful, I understand you are in a lot of pain. This is clearly very rushed and this is a major irreversible decision. I'm proud of you for coming forward, please just be gentle with yourself tonight

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

attempts done in the heat of the moment will do little more than damage your body and land you in a hospital. i understand the desperation, but attempting when you aren't in the proper state of mind is very dangerous.

 

[Ghost2211]

I hear you are distress. Talk to us. We will listen. Please don't use a kitchen knife it likely won't work and will cause you more suffering.

 

[ComradeJas]

im really sorry
i dont want to be here anymore for any reason
i just cant, i cant stay one more day here, its torture

i wanted to die before but none of them cared and now none of them care
thinking about staying one more day terrifies me, i've been hurting myself a lot today and the pain is not enough to distract me anymore
everything is over, i dont want anything anymore, wont get anything anymore either

im so sorry, so so so so sorry
i don't have anything else other than the knife, im so sorry

 

[Ghost2211]

I respect your choice to go now. Please consider something like hanging instead of a kitchen knife. Its really not as easy as it sounds, and you'll just damage yourself.

 

[ComradeJas]

I respect your choice to go now. Please consider something like hanging instead of a kitchen knife. Its really not as easy as it sounds, and you'll just damage yourself.

everyone is at home at all times and i dont even have a rope or a way to get it, i woudln't even consider usiing a knife if there was another option i could think of and i cant really think of anything
im scared of being even more humilliated if i survive
i thought about running away in the middle of the night and trying to find a better way to die, but that feels so unlikely

 

[Ghost2211]

everyone is at home at all times and i dont even have a rope or a way to get it, i woudln't even consider usiing a knife if there was another option i could think of and i cant really think of anything
im scared of being even more humilliated if i survive

Take some time to breathe and calm down, look through the methods topic. This won't work. You'll be in pain, bleeding, and confined to mental health services. I know you want to go, and are scared and distressed. Make a plan so you won't get damaged. We are here for you if you need support and want to talk.

 

[tidalwxves]

im really sorry
i dont want to be here anymore for any reason
i just cant, i cant stay one more day here, its torture

i wanted to die before but none of them cared and now none of them care
thinking about staying one more day terrifies me, i've been hurting myself a lot today and the pain is not enough to distract me anymore
everything is over, i dont want anything anymore, wont get anything anymore either

im so sorry, so so so so sorry
i don't have anything else other than the knife, im so sorry

You don't have to apologize, I only ask that you be careful I'm worried that because of your mental state you will only cause yourself more pain.

everyone is at home at all times and i dont even have a rope or a way to get it, i woudln't even consider usiing a knife if there was another option i could think of and i cant really think of anything
im scared of being even more humilliated if i survive
i thought about running away in the middle of the night and trying to find a better way to die, but that feels so unlikely

If someone is home you need to get their attention and do whatever is necessary to calm down and get through the night. This is not going to go like you think, I understand your pain and I'm proud of you for speaking up but you need to get someone who can get you through this day, a kitchen knife is a bad way to go

 

[Greenberg]

everyone is at home at all times and i dont even have a rope or a way to get it, i woudln't even consider usiing a knife if there was another option i could think of and i cant really think of anything
im scared of being even more humilliated if i survive
i thought about running away in the middle of the night and trying to find a better way to die, but that feels so unlikely

I can only imagine the level of pain and hopelessness you are enduring. Please take a moment to calm down prior to take any rash action. Do not worry about what other people think or feel. Your life belongs to you and only you; and you have every right to live or end it In the manner you want. There is no shame whatever your motive. If I may suggest, gather your strength of spirit and reflect upon what you really want. Best regards!

 

[ComradeJas]

Take some time to breathe and calm down, look through the methods topic. This won't work. You'll be in pain, bleeding, and confined to mental health services. I know you want to go, and are scared and distressed. Make a plan so you won't get damaged. We are here for you if you need support and want to talk.

i cant find any usable methods for me there, i could jump frm somewhere but i dont even know my city, im so tired and cant stop thinking about what happened these days
i've been getting people to help me through the night for so long, most of them left, my best friend doesn't even want anything to do with me anymore. im so terrible

I can only imagine the level of pain and hopelessness you are enduring. Please take a moment to calm down prior to take any rash action. Do not worry about what other people think or feel. Your life belongs to you and only you; and you have every right to live or end it In the manner you want. There is no shame whatever your motive. If I may suggest, gather your strength of spirit and reflect upon what you really want. Best regards!

i don't really care if other people look down on what i did, it's just about my own feelings, i dont want to deal with them or mytrust issues anymore and trying to go and surviving will make me feel even more guilty and it just feels so damn heavy oh my god

 

[fox21132113]

Give this a small walk outside the house. Small alterations can make a Significant difference to you in this moment

 

[ComradeJas]

imsorry, thank you
the fact that doing this is so risky feels so terrible
it's so fucking unfair, i just wanted to be happy for once even if living wasn't for me, I gave them everything i ever had but nothing ever mattered in the end

i feel so gross and ashamed after being cheated on, too, so that makes it even worse
i hate my stupid brain, i hate myself so much and the anxiety feels unbearable
i feel guilty for talking about myself so much now, im really sorry

 

[magic cat]

imsorry, thank you
the fact that doing this is so risky feels so terrible
it's so fucking unfair, i just wanted to be happy for once even if living wasn't for me, I gave them everything i ever had but nothing ever mattered in the end

i feel so gross and ashamed after being cheated on, too, so that makes it even worse
i hate my stupid brain, i hate myself so much and the anxiety feels unbearable
i feel guilty for talking about myself so much now, im really sorry

I understand how you're feeling, I've been suffering through similar circumstances the past few weeks. Hope you don't use the kitchen knife, the last thing you want to do is end up badly scarred and on a psychiatric hold. I'm glad you're talking about it! I know I find it difficult to talk about myself, especially when I'm at my lowest points.

 

[Ghost2211]

i cant find any usable methods for me there, i could jump frm somewhere but i dont even know my city, im so tired and cant stop thinking about what happened these days
i've been getting people to help me through the night for so long, most of them left, my best friend doesn't even want anything to do with me anymore. im so terrible

You're likely too distressed to think and plan carefully. Things go poorly when done on impulse. I respect any choice you make. I just don't want you to suffer even more. You don't need to be sorry for talking. We want to talk to you.

 

[Cow]

I have a personal rule that I will not commit suicide when I am thinking irrationally or in any kind of severe mental turmoil.

I have a strong belief that suicide should be a rational, long thought out decision.

I don't know if you feel the same way or not but I can tell that right now you are not calm by any definition and are unable to think rationally.

I think you should sleep on it, try to calm down, take some time to process the hurt.