Endless Suffering

[m1v]

Every day is getting worst, even when I thought it was getting better, it didn't. I've been suffering for far too long now, and I want to go. My original due date was in August, I might be a little too impatient but I'm planning on going earlier, and will depart in July instead, hopefully. My mental has been officially fucked, there's no going back from its 'original state'. Even if I try, I'm too broken to be fixed. I don't know what I did to deserve all of this suffering, at this point, everything doesn't even matter. I just want the misfortune & unbearable pain to end.

I'm done, I think my job here is done, I've got nothing left to fulfil. I'm valueless, my existence will only cause harm if I keep on living any further.
I only have to write my protocol down, with 2 different methods in case the first one fails, and that would be my last thread.

I think everyone should deserve a break and peace from this unethical world, and even death if that's what they wish for. No matter who you are, you deserve peace & happiness in any type of form. I might be giving up too soon, but I can't help it, there's no reason not to, I'm sorry.

 

[yukan]

i relate a lot
so i truly wish you the best with your plans and i hope you can go peacefully
you've been through a lot and deserve happiness

also i see ur a m1v fan? :)

 

[FuneralCry]

It truly is horrible to me how there is so much suffering in this hellish world, there certainly is too much pain in existing so I hope that you find the freedom that you are searching for. At least to me there could never be any peace in this world filled with harm.

 

[m1v]

i relate a lot
so i truly wish you the best with your plans and i hope you can go peacefully
you've been through a lot and deserve happiness

also i see ur a m1v fan? :)

Thank you. maybe I am. :)

This goes to everyone, please look after each other, everybody deserves to die peacefully, but I think it's still very important to make the right choice. CTB is something irreversible, and regret is the last thing I would like to feel, besides pain. Everyone, stay strong, or you might end up like me.

 

[TheSDMan]

What is going on with you if I may ask?

Guess I can related, basically I have:

1. Tinnitus, got extremely bad 3 years ago
2. Face skin issues, now irritating nearly 24h non stop since 2 years
3. Chronic dry eyes also since 2 years
4. Got testicular torsion 1 year ago
5. Crowns causing dental pain regularly

Either it's unfixable issues (e.g. Tinnitus), or doctors found zero solutions for me of trying in the past 2 years (skin and eyes).

Every day is just pushing the limit, I used to travel and do sport, I'm now stuck nearly daily inside just playing video games and suffering at the same time. The next game I want to play is kind of what keeps me alive.

Felt so lonely with the suffering in those past two years, I'm recently seeing an escort, she is actually very kind, I'm happy I got some last company.

I have already setup the secure pull bar and the rope at my disposition, watched many videos and pictures.

Just waiting the day my thought of "this is enough suffering" will move to the act. Don't really want to die but don't want to suffer anymore.