Eden2k

Eden2k

Experienced
Nov 20, 2018
228
Woke up this morning feeling even more like, "I can't continue feeling like this for another day." I have been in two
minds whether to text my therapist, but have decided against it, as I feel pathetic and a waste of space. I feel nauseous because I'm sick and tired of existing, due to how I feel. Pointless contacting my doctors surgery. They can't do nothing. I
think mental health services know they can't help me so just tell me, "if you are still struggling next week, then give us a call." I haven't the energy right now to eat, shower, get dressed etc. Fuck it!
 
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T

TiredHorse

Enlightened
Nov 1, 2018
1,819
I am so sorry. We woke up in much the same state, Eden2k, and it profoundly sucks. I wish I could offer more meaningful consolation, but I'm exhausted by another night sobbing and staring at the dark, and I'm just not finding any words that don't sound hollow even to me.

Mornings are a bitch. So are days and evenings and the interminable nights, but mornings are a special flavor of hell.

I hope your day becomes tolerable.
 
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Eden2k

Eden2k

Experienced
Nov 20, 2018
228
I am so sorry. We woke up in much the same state, Eden2k, and it profoundly sucks. I wish I could offer more meaningful consolation, but I'm exhausted by another night sobbing and staring at the dark, and I'm just not finding any words that don't sound hollow even to me.

Mornings are a bitch. So are days and evenings and the interminable nights, but mornings are a special flavor of hell.

I hope your day becomes tolerable.
Thank you.
It's hell isn't it? Pure undiluted hell.
 
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O

OkTotti

Wizard
Nov 6, 2018
616
Mornings and early afternoons are the times when I really want to CTB the most..... for some reason nights I feel better but I go out of mind mornings and early afternoon trapped in my apartment. I can't relax, no appetite. If it was not for SS, i'm not sure what I'd do...
 
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Eden2k

Eden2k

Experienced
Nov 20, 2018
228
Mornings and early afternoons are the times when I really want to CTB the most..... for some reason nights I feel better but I go out of mind mornings and early afternoon trapped in my apartment
I know the feeling/urge all to well. Early mornings and nights are the worst for me. Dreading tonight
 
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H

HelpPlease

Psych ward
Sep 9, 2018
188
I hate everything I dread every minute I'm sick sick sick sick I'm gonna die
 
W

whatever1111

Student
Feb 16, 2019
195
when it really gets most brutal, sometimes things like running can help, at least for me.
all of my problems, and probably with a lot of depressed people, is deep-seated, unconscious passivity
(ego being crushed by an agressive, over-bearing superego).
don't get me wrong, I dont have a cure for it - my will is weak, my self disfunctional - but sometimes
doing sth which requires a lot of effort, but is simple, like running, can help the person break the sinking into
the depths of pure hell for a little bit. i dont mean this as a serious solution to depression, but it helped me this morning,
to get out of the house and pull the brakes a little bit on suffering. funny how I cant do it to stop the depression
all the way, as if there's a hidden agenda in my psyche to suffer
 
F

fisil

Arcanist
Mar 9, 2019
432
Ohh man seeing edens posts and profile picture makes me sad. She is now almost half year dead.
 
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FionaWR

Member
May 27, 2019
67
I'm glad you woke up. I can't even sleep. Just been to the neighbors and he's so loud at night I threatened to knock 3 people out if they don't calm down. Unlikely that would have happened. But I wouldn't give a shit if I got my ass beat. Hopefully one of them would stab me.
 
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