Venting Drained to the bones

[disgusting-life]

please just let me die

I can't keep doing this, everyday is psychological torture. TORTURE.

I can't do this
I can't handle this

I just endure and endure all the time.
Every day goes by and I just get more of a reason to kill myself

It's like someone is tryna tell me something, when all around me I just get reminded on my fucking pathetic life

Please just let me die you've got to understand

I've been holding it up all this while but my knees are buckling, my legs are quivering, I can't hold up more

The walls are closing in. You've got to understand
Its not my fault when the only option thats left is to die, its the only way to escape my life that has become such a solid trap

I can't do this anymore, the mask is getting weary. Cant keep performing i cant keep smiling and laughing when ive got no reason to be happy

Oh God i just wanna die, be dead, gone and over with , its the only peace i see

Each day is just more torture, its drains the energy i dont have, i cant keep functioning

im so alone, i cant even put it into words, its so bad and i did it to myself

My life has basically ended already, dont know what im still doing here

Im not meant to be here anynore, theres nothing for me youve got to understand

Im so jealous of the dead

I cant hold any more yet more weight is still being added , its going to collapse on me flat.

Sooner or later ive gotta do it, so youve gotta understand, dont blame me

 

[Realgar]

I feel the same way! It is time for me to go to my spiritual home, I am home sick! I want to go home!!!!