Venting Done opening up to real people.

[futurebuscatcher]

I talk about wanting to kill myself and no one cares to do anything. My own mother laughed it off when I told of my steps to suicide. My friends just keep saying "omg same" or make it about themsleves then got so worried when I seem "off". My online friends are the shitty cut and dry pro-lifer "nooo don't do it you have so much to live for and I'll be sad" bullshit cause I know they won't mourn.

Literally everyone I open up to doesn't care even these shitty professionals to which I went to 4 of by now. What's the fucking point?

In a way I hope this keeps happening so it really does push me to the edge cause it is. This is the final push I need and it needs.

I hate that the friends who once felt there for me are the ones that push me most of all

 

[SVEN]

If it's any, small, consolation at least you can come here and know that we totally get that you're struggling, misunderstood and the very folk who should be making an effort to empathise and support just aren't.

 

[FinalDawn]

I've been feeling the same way. My girlfriend has been getting very upset with me when I talk about my feelings, especially with hopelessness and suicidality. So much so that our relationship is basically hanging by a thread.

I think a lot don't care, sure, but I also think a lot get frustrated with not being able to easily "fix" us, maybe also emotionally overwhelmed with what we're saying, and so they reject us, or tell us to go to a therapist. It's not personal, they just don't feel capable of helping, I guess.

 

[zero.viscosity]

I've been feeling the same way. My girlfriend has been getting very upset with me when I talk about my feelings, especially with hopelessness and suicidality. So much so that our relationship is basically hanging by a thread.

I think a lot don't care, sure, but I also think a lot get frustrated with not being able to easily "fix" us, maybe also emotionally overwhelmed with what we're saying, and so they reject us, or tell us to go to a therapist. It's not personal, they just don't feel capable of helping, I guess.

This is definitely part of it. I didn't feel truly understood until the woman I'm seeing now casually mentioned to her doctor, while I was with her, that she had once been hospitalized for a suicide attempt. Since then, we connect on a different level—there's a mutual understanding that doesn't require words or revisiting old pain. Most people simply can't relate in the same way. As a recovering addict, I feel a similar disconnect when others learn about my history with alcohol and drugs. It's not that they don't want to help; they just aren't equipped to understand on that deeper level.

 

[afternoontea]

I still remember the time during covid, when I wasn't attending my online college classes, my mom dragged me out of the house and into the car by my hair and said she'd drive me to the hospital because I told her I was feeling suicidal and didn't care if she hurt me. I kept telling her I was feeling suicidal, so at that point, instead of driving me to the hospital (which i wouldn't have cared if she did, maybe she should have), she drove me to the lake and told me to walk in and drown myself if I wanted to.

I still love my mom even though we get into arguments, she cares about me through her actions and words but whenever I bring up anything suicidal or mental health related she does shit like that. I'm so sorry your mother treats you the same way.

 

[futurebuscatcher]

Thanks

this is why i like this community. No bullshit.

If it's any, small, consolation at least you can come here and know that we totally get that you're struggling, misunderstood and the very folk who should be making an effort to empathise and support just aren't.

 

[Omnia131]

Suicide and it's likes are still something most people don't know or really want to talk about because they've been raised to believe that suffering while alive is better than peace in death.