doing SH for the scars not the pain

[m4rmaid]

it was never about the pain for me, infact i hate how it feels. it's always been just both a punishment method for myself to feel less like a piece of shit and also like it's traces of my suffering, proof that what im feeling is real.. seeing multiple scars all over my arms everytime i get changed is like a reminder that it's not just something that's gonna be fixed by "getting closer to god" or some shit. i dont know if that makes it any less legitimate

 

[Leonard_Bangley39]

when i first started out it was for the pain cause the sting and lingering burns helped distract me from things and ground me in the present. after a while i started liking the scars more and now i do it exclusively for the scars. After i cut ill wash them out with hydrogen peroxide to make sure that they scar even more.