Does cutting help?

[Rose190021]

I've been cutting since I was 13. At first it was just scratches and now I use a utility blade to cut. Does anyone else get words in their head that they have to carve into their skin? Like right now I have disgusting, ignorant, and bitch on my arm. It almost makes me feel better having those words there to remind myself of what I am and why I need to ctb. What is your cutting experience? Does it help you feel better or worse?

 

[SearchForPeace]

I've only had to urge to cut "kill me" into my skin. And it's left a pretty sweet scar. A good reminder that i want to be dead. I cut nice symmetrical lines, OCD, i like the way they look. I cut frequently but managed to stop for almost a year, but then gave up on life again and started cutting again. I like the pain, but at the same time it releases pain too ya know. I like the blood flowing out of my body as it kinda of represents that i'm worthless and im nothing more than a sack of blood. It also allows me to release anger, rather than breaking a shit load of stuff that i'll think after - shit, i shouldn't have smashed that. Makes me feel better to remind myself that im worthless and i want to be dead.

 

[Rose190021]

I like blood running across my skin too. I like the feeling. I like looking at my cuts. It's a constant reminder of where I'm at and what I am. It feels better when I'm really upset too. I also like the burning pain that comes after fresh cuts. Especially when the cuts are rubbing against my clothing.

 

[JadedGray]

I used to cut when I was in my teens. At the time I guess it was just a way of releasing anger, since I never used to express anger... although I can't for sure know what was going through my mind at the time. I didn't get stitches (my parents refused to drive me to the hospital, saying that I did it to myself and had to live with the consequences) and now I'm left with my arms being covered in scars. It's a constant reminder of just how long I've been feeling this depressed. It's worse in the summertime having to wear long sleeves. Being an impulsive teen I didn't think how the scars would impact me long term. I especially hate it when I have to go to a doctors appointment/getting blood taken... they either stare, awkwardly look away or worse, ask me questions about them, like why I did it. I spent many years regretting it, but now that I have accepted death it doesn't bother me anymore.

 

[21Neberg]

I don't even know if it helps anymore. It used to be a coping mechanism, and perhaps it still is, but nowadays I cut out of habit, and I still feel like shit after I've cut.

 

[dandan]

Really?

No , no no, I am not a self - cutter, and I dont want to cut myself, and I dont see how it can have a positive effect... please dont cut yourself.. no

I could suggest joining a Box Academy or run your hate-off but running is intense... cutting no...

 

[Chalken]

It seems like it helps because it releases endorphins. It helps in short-term, but it doesn't fix the underlying problem. I used to cut, but my mom took away the blades and I somehow been clean for almost a year now. I still have ugly scars on my forearms and thighs though, and they remind me that I'm still not okay. Also, the urges to self-harm are still there.

 

[Umbra]

I've tried self injury once, as you said just scratches. I didn't feel much satisfaction but also no dissatisfaction. Not for me I suppose.

 

[Rose190021]

I don't even know if it helps anymore. It used to be a coping mechanism, and perhaps it still is, but nowadays I cut out of habit, and I still feel like shit after I've cut.

I'm sorry you feel like shit afterwards. I guess it really doesn't help us. It makes us worse. I just can't say that I'd quit cutting because it's almost like I'm manipulating myself into believing that I can't be saved.

 

[AveryConure]

It helps temporarily but the feeling is still there a lot of the time. I get cigarette burns from an alter of mine but I assume it's the same deal for her.

 

[Hotsackage]

Doesn't it hurt

 

[Rose190021]

Doesn't it hurt

Cutting hurts but it's a good hurt. There's the pain when you cut and then the burning after you cut. For me the pain helps when I'm upset.

 

[JayZT]

I've never cut deep though I have experimented with a blade on my arms and legs. I guess I didn't do it deep enough or for long enough for it too have more of an effect on me.

 

[JadedGray]

Burning isn't as common as cutting, much like self immolation isn't as common as slitting the wrists/throat. I tried burning myself with a cigarette once. I must not have enjoyed it that much as I only have one scar from it from when I was a teenager, that and lack of access to cigarettes compared to razor blades. Different strokes for different folks...

 

[Abaigh]

I have a low pain tolerance so it acc hurts me bad but I was the same just scratches now proper blades. The only word I've ever carved is die but I carve it often.

 

[justwantdeath]

It landed me in the psych ward, although I cut deep enough that I left a big puddle of blood on the floor, so it's not like I did could have hidden it.

 

[porfin1234]

I've always felt like I needed to be punished. It was a way to hurt myself for being a bad person but also for having feelings I felt I shouldn't have.
I started mutilating as a teen (burning) but I think the reason was more for the sensation I got. Maybe I felt like I needed stimulation from all the isolating I did. I felt so bored and empty and needed to feel alive.

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

I'm 39 and still cut. For the last 6 months it's been my upper leg. Most recent was a few days ago. I have a lot of cuts from years ago on my arms and hands. I one time did it to my face. Sometimes if I am crying and I can't stop crying I cut, with that I stop. Cutting and smoking are my two longest running habits.

 

[Ghost2211]

I cut in a different way. I to use a razor blade to cut calluses off my feet. I like the feeling of Slicing the tissue off. I like the huge pile of material I've removed after The fact. it makes me calm and happy for some reason. I've gotten better about cutting too deep since it hurts to walk on cuts and bandages draw attention. I only do it when I want the feeling of removing tissue.