Does anyone have a mega backup plan before they ctb

[Metavoid]

When things get to the point that Im totally ready to kill myself, I'm going to quit my job, change my number, take all the money I have, pack a suitcase, and run away to a different city and try to start life over how I want on my terms. It won't matter if I end up broke and homeless and fail because at that point I'll just kill myself.

Someone told me once that before you kill yourself you are free to do anything without restriction or risk of failure because you have nothing to lose. In my case, I want to ctb because my life and the people around me are shit and are making my life shit and everything is fucking shit. If I could at least attempt escape, I can say that I at least tried before I ctb.

 

[nzdarkshark]

No back-up plan for me - but running away and trying to live life on own terms sounds like a mighty fine idea.

 

[Daystavro]

No , I don't.

Ctb is my backup plan in case I don't enjoy life and have nothing to live for, which is already the case.

 

[Metavoid]

No , I don't.

Ctb is my backup plan in case I don't enjoy life and have nothing to live for, which is already the case.

True. I guess this is like my final try before the backup. Kinda like a pre backup plan.

 

[Daystavro]

True. I guess this is like my final try before the backup. Kinda like a pre backup plan.

But , I don't want to discourage you.
If you think you can still turn your life around then go for it.

 

[NotAlive]

None for me. My "life ended" years ago when my wife of 10 years left me for no good reason. I have no family (that gives a shit about me), no friends left to hang out with. My day to day existence for several years now has been sitting around alone. Ironically, this small crappy apartment that I'm in now is so close to the freight train tracks, that it shakes whenever a heavy load train passes by here. This area I live in is popular for train suicide, there's been 2 in 2018 so far, both successful. Most of the trains go about 40mph here and standing between the 2 tracks here results in death every time. That's been my method of choice for years. I've been on the tracks more than once but moved at the last second. It takes balls of steel to stand there and let a train hit you, resulting in your remains being usually unrecognizable, even to someone who knows you.

 

[Trashcan]

Nothing huge. I just cleaned and tidied my room today, wrote my note, and did a hard reset on my phone. I should be dead by now, but the person who was going to leave the house ended up not doing so. However, I should get a change in a few hours... hopefully I don't wimp out. I also took half a xanax to calm down my nerves, I might have to do so again in a few hours.

I have learned to try in school and not quit my job in case something happens. I remember in high school I thought I'd ctb by 18 so I didn't try. It messed up my academics big time. If I had tried harder and was a better student, I might not want to ctb.

 

[Kooz]

I'm working through my backup plan right now and so far it's not working out. I could leave I guess, but I would feel even more guilty than I do right now.

 

[okyeah]

I was mulling over giving life 1 more try if I could get my N. I would probably move cities also. Get in good shape. Take my pills everyday for a year. See if anyone likes me at all after that...If my social life improves. If I can make friends on my own terms instead of out of desperation. If nothing changes I can just end it whenever.

 

[Schopenhauer]

No, I'm living my life normally. I have to be prepared for failure, or getting cold feet. If that happens, I don't want to be without a job, or anything too radical.

If I do receive my N, I'll have an orgy, and I'll eat like there's tomorrow. Because there will be no tomorrow for me. But that's it, and only because N is certain, and I'm quite sure I'll have the guts to drink it.

 

[Metavoid]

No, I'm living my life normally. I have to be prepared for failure, or getting cold feet. If that happens, I don't want to be without a job, or anything too radical.

If I do receive my N, I'll have an orgy, and I'll eat like there's tomorrow. Because there will be no tomorrow for me. But that's it, and only because N is certain, and I'm quite sure I'll have the guts to drink it.

I wish I could get n.. I cant risk losing that much money on a product I might not even recieve. That and I know nothing about cryptos. But I wish

 

[bigj75]

I've already done that.

I got my own apartment, got a better job, drank, self improved, fucked tons of escorts, and women. Didn't work for me.

 

[Sayo]

My problems are within me and will follow me wherever I go (and I can't go very far due to illness). My 'backup plan' would be to give up on all my dreams and concept of self, basically. I'd rather fall on my sword personally. But I think it is very sensible for someone who is in a messed up situation to try leaving the situation and see if there is any prospect of getting better. So many problems that seem internal are environmentally exacerbated or even imposed (there is still the trauma to deal with, but it is hard to heal in the place that made you ill).

For now I am trying to live semi-normally as I do not have the means I need to leave, basically for the reasons Schopenhauer gave.

 

[Schopenhauer]

I wish I could get n.. I cant risk losing that much money on a product I might not even recieve. That and I know nothing about cryptos. But I wish

I don't think I'll actually receive it, though. Customs in my country suck. But I had to try. It's easy to buy, and not that expensive, for all the benefits it provides.

Since you're in the UK (I think), you could try ordering from the new guy Patric, once he has been properly vetted by the community (i.e. people receive the product and confirm it's legitimate). As long as you do it befor Brexit closes your borders.

 

[GeorgeEastman]

I'm living it now. Talking to myself freely in public. Having all kinds of outbursts and not giving a damn if people see it.

I just had my driver's license renewed. In the picture, I look like they dug me up. Hell, I look close enough to death that I won't make it much longer anyhow. Big bonus. Feels like I kind of won the lottery.

 

[ouvreyes]

Nothing huge. I just cleaned and tidied my room today, wrote my note, and did a hard reset on my phone. I should be dead by now, but the person who was going to leave the house ended up not doing so. However, I should get a change in a few hours... hopefully I don't wimp out. I also took half a xanax to calm down my nerves, I might have to do so again in a few hours.

I have learned to try in school and not quit my job in case something happens. I remember in high school I thought I'd ctb by 18 so I didn't try. It messed up my academics big time. If I had tried harder and was a better student, I might not want to ctb.

I'm basically living high school you right now, lol...

Don't really have anything, since I'm a minor and can't drive... all my hypotheticals would rely on having another person. But if the opportunity came, I'd like to think I'd take it and run away.

 

[iamthezero]

Hmm probably in the same situation as most of you. I would hate for it end so aprubtly but somethings can be fucked up beyond repair. I am trying my best to patch and fix the rubble I call my life. At the same time I am making sure my end plan is as fool proof as it can be, so that if the time comes ...it'll be a very easy goodbye.

 

[TAW122]

I don't really have a lot except to try to do some of the things (that are feasible financially and within my capabilities) on my bucketlist before I ctb. I think once I made my decision on ctb'ing it would be a matter of time rather than if.

 

[Prime]

No back up plan as I don't want anything but peace now, peace that only ctb can offer. I am gonna try ligature strangulation. Back plan for that? Partial suspension. Back plan for that? Full suspension. Then I won't need anymore back ups.

 

[sadak_the_wanderer]

I'm not trying to escape my life, only life itself.

 

[Roph]

I have a Plan B. I learned after two failed attempts to have a backup plan.