Discussion Does anyone else get more suicidal when at work?

[Erin Inari]

Noticed this a while back but it seems like every day now I come into work and leave in a worse mood than I came in. At this point its the smallest things that set me into suicidal thoughts and when not that its when I have some down time and my mind wanders. Anyone else experience something similar?

 

[Thanatos]

I cant work and am luckily on disability

 

[jesse]

I notice the opposite. Work puts me in a different head space where I have less ideation. After work, however, all that pent up depression floods in like it was building all day.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Yes my first full time job I had when I was 18 I went down with depression after 1½ month I was an apprentice in a butchers shop and after just 1 week I realized I had to do this 10 hours a day 5 days a week for the rest of my life and that is not living.

Right now I am trying to get disability money because I can´t work because of physical problems but even if I could work I would rather die I don´t see how having to slave away your life by working 8-10 hours 5 days a week for the rest of your life just to have 2 days to yourself is considered living.

I cant work and am luckily on disability

What problems do you have and what country? I am trying to get disability too.

 

[Thanatos]

What problems do you have and what country? I am trying to get disability too.

Canada, bipolar 2 and multiple anxiety disorders. I dont see the point in life which makes work seem dull and pointless. It drives me insane and I've attempted multiple times fueled by stress from working. I'm very lucky to have income still

 

[stormrOzzy]

Usually I stay like this. I feel tired and even at home little things irritate me. I happened to be at a friend's house and everyone was talking, so I got annoyed and my head just had strange thoughts, I wanted to hurt them.

 

[Nem]

Holyfuckingshit, I call crisis lines at work to get me through the day. I'm just fucked right up, can barely function and I mean barely. Getting closer to death every single day
Peace/hugs

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Canada, bipolar 2 and multiple anxiety disorders. I dont see the point in life which makes work seem dull and pointless. It drives me insane and I've attempted multiple times fueled by stress from working. I'm very lucky to have income still

"Lucky" you at least you don´t have to work. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist next month so I am kind of hoping to get some diagnoses since I think I might be bipolar too the only catch is I cannot say I am suicidal so I am afraid it will influenze the results.

 

[azucaramargo]

Holyfuckingshit, I call crisis lines at work to get me through the day. I'm just fucked right up, can barely function and I mean barely. Getting closer to death every single day
Peace/hugs

This sounds like me. Thank you for this.

 

[Rachel74]

Most definitely, plus it would be easy here I could just jump in front of a train, but I could not do it as it would impact the people at work.

 

[Readytogo227]

Definitely. Every day I work i want to buy my SN and ctb. The only thing keeping me here is the fact that my husband would be financially screwed if I die now.

 

[Erin Inari]

Sometimes I just kind of want to CTB at my work place but my coworkers don't deserve that

 

[justanotherday]

Work is a big part of the reason I want to exit. It triggers my anxiety, ADD can make concentration hard, and I get so bored ,and all I ever get are boring, soul sucking jobs. The jobs I get have no meaning to me whatsoever. They do not pay enough, and it is all I can do to keep from quitting or getting fired. I am stuck in an endless rut.

 

[bigj75]

Canada, bipolar 2 and multiple anxiety disorders. I dont see the point in life which makes work seem dull and pointless. It drives me insane and I've attempted multiple times fueled by stress from working. I'm very lucky to have income still

shit like this is why I don't understand why there isn't assisted suicide for things like this. do they just expect you to enjoy living with what you have to go through? just tolerate it the rest of your life. if you want to ctb you should easily have that option.

 

[Thanatos]

shit like this is why I don't understand why there isn't assisted suicide for things like this. do they just expect you to enjoy living with what you have to go through? just tolerate it the rest of your life. if you want to ctb you should easily have that option.

I couldn't agree more

 

[hersheybar]

Fuck yes. Every day on my drive to work I have an anxiety attack and have to sit in the parking lot and try to pull myself together. It doesn't help that I pushed away everyone here that I considered a friend and now am on a different shift because it hurt too much to keep seeing them every day. I wish I could just stay at home and waste away but I've held this job and a previous job for 3+ years so there's no way anyone would believe I can't work.

 

[TAW122]

Not usually, but thorough life and life in general, yes I do stew in those thoughts because of the futility of life and also the unfulfilled goals in life as well as problems in life.

 

[anonbpdgirl]

Whenever I'm at work I come on this website. I talk to crisis lines. I look up SN. I start writing notes. I want to kill myself when I'm there the most.

 

[Darkhaven]

Well it's university for me. And yeah, definately.
The closer i am to people the more i realise how weird and alone i am in this world.
That makes me feel like a ghost.
I'm there, but at the same time it's like i'm not.
I don't talk with anyone. I just sit in the back all alone and contemplative.

 

[sleepy dog]

Whenever I'm at work I come on this website. I talk to crisis lines. I look up SN. I start writing notes. I want to kill myself when I'm there the most.

What work do you do?

 

[ConfusedandDazed]

Usually it's my drive home from work. Everything becomes more of a reality about life's failures. You get those ideas about swerving to hit a bridge or semi.

 

[sadgirl2002]

When I started working in a nursery and I was put in the baby room for five days a week, 8 hours a day, the suicidal thoughts got worse. Every morning as I walked to work, I wished I got run over by a car and everytime I went to bad, I wanted to die in my sleep so badly. The last time I had both of those thoughts in an extreme level was when I was in high school. I quit the job as soon as I could and I finally felt a sense of relief.

 

[RM5998]

Depends on the kind of work. If it's trivial, like now, it gets pretty bad. If it's somewhat interesting, it's somewhat better than normal.

 

[anonbpdgirl]

What work do you do?

I'm a support worker.

 

[Emily123]

Yes . I do . Because they treat me like animal . there is dicrimination , injustice,harassment and many other negative things .