Discussion Do you wonder what they'll do with your body once you pass?

[ferrie]

Ultimately it doesn't really matter, but I wonder a lot about what will happen to my body once I pass. I'm not in a position to leave a will or advanced directive, but it would be nice to be cremated with a few options of either letting my ashes be separated for different people to keep, having them spread at either the lake I grew up next to or the one at my chosen home city, or used to grow a tree. I think the most likely thing to happen though will be that I'm buried at one of two cemeteries, depending on which parent is allowed to choose. I think a lot too about what choices they're likely to make for my funeral. What about you guys?

 

[locked*n*loaded]

OP: If you are unable to get a will drafted, you should, at least, write a letter stating your wishes, and it should be signed and dated, as well.

I had a will drafted. There will probably be an autopsy of some sort, but, after that, I will be cremated and my ashes placed in a "niche" in the grave monument where my mother is buried.

 

[Eternal Eyes]

Never saw the point of big funerals, maybe I'm overly nihilistic here but it's not like the dead person will actually see them. They're extremely expensive for what people actually get, as no doubt people in mourning are not too fussy over costs so the directors can charge whatever they want.

I've always wanted to donate my body to medical science, although imagine Ctb will end that idea depending on which method.

As for wills, most my assets are in cash and I'm hardly wealthy, so I guess I've never thought about it.

 

[ferrie]

OP: If you are unable to get a will drafted, you should, at least, write a letter stating your wishes, and it should be signed and dated, as well.

I had a will drafted. There will probably be an autopsy of some sort, but, after that, I will be cremated and my ashes placed in a "niche" in the grave monument where my mother is buried.

I'm choosing not to leave behind anything stating what my wishes are, even if I was able to have a will drafted. At that point what I think will no longer matter, and I would rather my family be able to do what will help them process their grief the most as I'm leaving behind two sets of parents and a lot of younger siblings who are still children.

I think the sentiment of having your ashes placed where your mother is buried is lovely, though I am sorry for your loss. Have you looked into advanced planning through a funeral home? It's my understanding that you're able to pay for things like the cremation service and urn in advance. So it's extra insurance that your exact wishes will be followed, and no one else has to worry about any related costs if you do have a next of kin that would be involved

 

[whatever321]

Does anyone who's a suicidal, really cares about that? i honestly couldn't care less about what happens to my body after i'm gone, like, truthfully, i know after i'm gone, it'll be the same as it was before i was born, nothing at all... why would i care, about my body in this life? if i'm going to be out of it? i know my family won't even have money to bury my body in a normal cemetery, that's why i hope to never be found, it'd better and less traumatic for those who are staying...

 

[ferrie]

Never saw the point of big funerals, maybe I'm overly nihilistic here but it's not like the dead person will actually see them. They're extremely expensive for what people actually get, as no doubt people in mourning are not too fussy over costs so the directors can charge whatever they want.

I've always wanted to donate my body to medical science, although imagine CBT will end that idea depending on which method.

As for wills, most my assets are in cash and I'm hardly wealthy, so I guess I've never thought about it.

I agree, a lot of funeral expenses are way higher than they should be. There's so many ways people profit off of other's grief...

Donating your body to science is pretty similar to organ donation in that you have to be found after death extremely quickly since the body needs to be preserved. I imagine it's virtually impossible to guarantee a ctb attempt in a timeframe that would work for donation.

If you strongly don't want a funeral, that could be reason enough to write a will. Or if you have anything you want to say to people. I had an aunt pass who left all of her siblings exactly $1 & told them basically to suck it lol

Does anyone who's a suicidal, really cares about that? i honestly couldn't care less about what happens to my body after i'm gone, like, truthfully, i know after i'm gone, it'll be the same as it was before i was born, nothing at all... why would i care, about my body in this life? if i'm going to be out of it? i know my family won't even have money to bury my body in a normal cemetery, that's why i hope to never be found, it'd better and less traumatic for those who are staying...

Some suicidal people do care a lot about what happens to their body for a variety of reasons, but I get your point of view

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I'm choosing not to leave behind anything stating what my wishes are, even if I was able to have a will drafted. At that point what I think will no longer matter, and I would rather my family be able to do what will help them process their grief the most as I'm leaving behind two sets of parents and a lot of younger siblings who are still children.

I think the sentiment of having your ashes placed where your mother is buried is lovely, though I am sorry for your loss. Have you looked into advanced planning through a funeral home? It's my understanding that you're able to pay for things like the cremation service and urn in advance. So it's extra insurance that your exact wishes will be followed, and no one else has to worry about any related costs if you do have a next of kin that would be involved

I already paid for my cremation. Frankly, there won't be any funeral, or service, because, quite simply, there is no one to come. All of my family died over the past 6 years and I'm the last one left. I don't have any friends, either, so there just isn't any reason to have a funeral and service. I drafted a will with my wishes, and prepaid for cremation ahead of time, simply because I really didn't have a choice. I, also, had to explicitly put in my will that I require a "professional" executor, appointed by the court, to handle my estate affairs when I pass. All I require when I pass is the cremation and then having the monument "guy" put my ashes in the niche in the monument and then engrave the stone with my passing date. No fanfare, no fuss.

 

[lizzywizzy09]

Family already knows I want to be cremated. Best friend gets them, what he does with them I don't care.

 

[set0553]

My family is most likely to give me a "proper burial" and funeral somewhere, where everyone would line up to view my body in a casket with the "he was a good man" phoney crap.. etc. But like you, id prefer cremation, no funeral, no big production. Say a prayer or whatever, and dump the ashes wherever they'd feel would be the best place, and then forget about it.. should be easy enough since they forget about me all the time now. but I hope they'll just keep it simple and lowkey..

 

[ferrie]

I already paid for my cremation. Frankly, there won't be any funeral, or service, because, quite simply, there is no one to come. All of my family died over the past 6 years and I'm the last one left. I don't have any friends, either, so there just isn't any reason to have a funeral and service. I drafted a will with my wishes, and prepaid for cremation ahead of time, simply because I really didn't have a choice. I, also, had to explicitly put in my will that I require a "professional" executor, appointed by the court, to handle my estate affairs when I pass. All I require when I pass is the cremation and then having the monument "guy" put my ashes in the niche in the monument and then engrave the stone with my passing date. No fanfare, no fuss.

That sounds quite lonely. I think it's admirable that you seem to have all of your affairs methodically thought out and in order though. Not many people tend to think ahead so thoroughly, and I hope it gives you some sort of peace knowing everything will be taken care of when you pass

 

[set0553]

I agree, a lot of funeral expenses are way higher than they should be. There's so many ways people profit off of other's grief...

Donating your body to science is pretty similar to organ donation in that you have to be found after death extremely quickly since the body needs to be preserved. I imagine it's virtually impossible to guarantee a ctb attempt in a timeframe that would work for donation.

If you strongly don't want a funeral, that could be reason enough to write a will. Or if you have anything you want to say to people. I had an aunt pass who left all of her siblings exactly $1 & told them basically to suck it lol

Organ donation has to happen with organs whose cells are still alive, so essentially from brain dead bodies on what equates to life support. You'd have to die in the hospital, so I don't think unconsensual organ donation is smth anyone ctbing would have to worry about

Some suicidal people do care a lot about what happens to their body for a variety of reasons, but I get your point of view

Your aunt sounds like she was awesome!

 

[ferrie]

My family is most likely to give me a "proper burial" and funeral somewhere, where everyone would line up to view my body in a casket with the "he was a good man" phoney crap.. etc. But like you, id prefer cremation, no funeral, no big production. Say a prayer or whatever, and dump the ashes wherever they'd feel would be the best place, and then forget about it.. should be easy enough since they forget about me all the time now. but I hope they'll just keep it simple and lowkey..

Oof I feel you on the casket line up & being forgotten. No one kept contact with me at all until I was hospitalized, but they're likely to make my funeral a big to do, especially with how big my family is. I'm assuming your family is religious with the "say a prayer or whatever" lol? My mother's side of the family is Catholic, so if she gets to plan the funeral it's gonna be so drawn out with the priest & everything

Your aunt sounds like she was awesome!

She was a feisty lady lmao. Left everything else to her nephew but specified that he had to spend most of her money on her dog