Do you think leaving a note is important?

[PuppyinPain]

I know many people decide to leave some form of communication behind whether it be a text, note, etc… but after years of planning ctb methods I have never once felt compelled to write a note, I feel as if I simply have nothing left to say. Does anyone else feel that notes are unimportant as well? And if so why do you feel that way? People who do think it's important to say goodbye I'd like to hear your side as well.

 

[flyinghigh]

i used to write multiple notes and i still have some, but at this point i'm unsure if i'll leave one behind. i guess i want to leave one telling the ones around me that it wasn't their fault but if i'm honest when i'm truly close to giving up, writing a note is the last thing on my mind

 

[charlotte_]

It depends on what you want for yourself really. It can matter to certain people, but to others including you it isn't and that's totally ok. I think most people leave notes to reassure their loved ones, so if you want to do that then you should leave a note. If not, then don't. It's all personal choices not to be messed with.

 

[FuneralCry]

When it comes to this topic, it's a personal decision. Whether leaving a note is the best thing or not is up to the individual, some people might want to write notes so those left behind are less likely to be left with as many unanswered questions, but nobody is owed an explanation. Often those who write notes have things they wish to say but if someone doesn't then that's fine.

 

[PuppyinPain]

i used to write multiple notes and i still have some, but at this point i'm unsure if i'll leave one behind. i guess i want to leave one telling the ones around me that it wasn't their fault but if i'm honest when i'm truly close to giving up, writing a note is the last thing on my mind

This is close to how I first acted on the manner, at first I believed writing a note was important as mostly everyone does, but in desperate times I thought differently, "I won't be here anyways" type of thing, really letting go

It depends on what you want for yourself really. It can matter to certain people, but to others including you it isn't and that's totally ok. I think most people leave notes to reassure their loved ones, so if you want to do that then you should leave a note. If not, then don't. It's all personal choices not to be messed with.

When it comes to this topic, it's a personal decision. Whether leaving a note is the best thing or not is up to the individual, some people might want to write notes so those left behind are less likely to be left with as many unanswered questions, but nobody is owed an explanation. Often those who write notes have things they wish to say but if someone doesn't then that's fine.

I definitely agree it is a personal decision, I guess it depends on how you view the eternal sleep, and what you want to leave behind. I respect those who have the strength to say something and leave that part of their personal thoughts behind them.

 

[Little_Suzy]

I believe leaving farewell notes for those that supported you is vital.

This altruistic act can reassure the other person that you left this world voluntarily and with a clear mind. Make them feel at peace if they think that ctb is inappropriate. Tell them it's OK to accept your choice and go on with their life.

Do not put pen to paper for people who don't love you. Those folks aren't worth your time and effort since they don't care.

People often leave the police a letter explaining their actions were voluntary and no crime was committed.

 

[Rabbit-]

I go back-and-forth on this a lot... I've spent a long time hiding my true self, lying about my emotions, so parts of me want the chance to explain myself and reveal everything, to tell people what I truly think- Not in a hateful way, but finally acknowledging the ways this world has hurt me and why ctb was inevitable for me.

I'd like to give comfort, too, to those I love, and to sincerely thank them for their efforts in making my life more bearable, even if it didn't work. It's the thought that counts, right? Giving away my possessions, as well, though I know a note's not as legally sound as a will.

At the same time, I think there's almost too much left to say. I could talk about the "why", I could show gratitude, but in the end none of it would change anything, and putting my final thoughts on paper- The last memory anyone will have of me- feels overwhelming and intimidating. This is likely just my anxiety speaking, but I've worried so much about making it perfect... So it honestly feels easier to just let things be what they are, let the outcome speak for itself.

It is probably a good idea to at least say it was intentional though so no one assumes something wild.

 

[imissmykitten]

i think notes can be important if there is something you really want to say, or if you want to avoid leaving unanswered questions to whoever you would leave a hypothetical note to. but it's not necessary. i would personally write one because i don't want to leave unanswered questions or for anyone to feel guilty, and also because i would like to say things i usually wouldn't have the courage to. but you don't have to.

it really just depends on what purpose it serves for you, what it would mean to you and others, etc.

 

[cherrysquick]

i have very mixed feelings :/ i have my notes ready for my closest friends but i dont know, it never seems like i can give enough closure in them and just straight up dont know what to say besides "hey sorry i cbted its not your fault dont feel guilty". at this point i dont know if im gonna end up leaving them at all because it seems kinda pointless. in the end i think its an individual decision to make and obviously depends on what your relationships or life in general is like

 

[Das Nichts]

Personally I can't Imagine to write nothing. If i was on the opposite side this would hurt me very much.

For me it's important to tell them that they could have done nothing, that this was my job. I tried but did not succeed.

But in the end it also says that I know I have decided for me and against them. Which is a simple but very painful truth.

 

[SilentSadness]

It's fine not to leave a note. I will most likely not be leaving a note. The act of suicide is the most conclusive act of all, I don't think there is a need for any more closure.

 

[The_End_Is_Comfort]

It's a personal choice I guess, it does help reassure any loved ones about your choice and let's authorities know that you were not a victim of a crime.

Me personally, I want to leave a note for my loved ones too as well as it doubling as a will for my personal belongings.

 

[Ambivalent1]

No I will just disappear one day. If I don't get to have the closure I want, then neither does anyone else.

 

[Forever Sleep]

For me- yes. Firstly- just from a legal standpoint- this was a suicide. No one else knew or was involved. I also personally want to write that I feel I was in my right mind. That it wasn't an impulsive act and that I believe we all should have the right of autonomy.

Plus, I do still have people I care about in life. Not that it will likely be of much comfort but I want them to know there's nothing they could have done to help or stop me- which is why I didn't tell them how much I was struggling. Obviously- I want to say sorry too- that it wasn't my intention to hurt them. That I hope they can forgive me and try to be relieved for me that I'm now free.

 

[ejt]

I feel like I have a lot of people I need to leave notes to: each of my parents, my sister, my brother, my best friend, the rescue that will be taking my bird, my therapist who I saw for many years until I moved, my psychiatrist, my best friend...maybe more. I want them to know that this was not their fault and there's nothing they could have done to stop me. Most important, I want to be clear on my animals' needs and make sure they are given proper care when I'm gone.

 

[prtsn]

for me personally no, its not important. the less I leave behind the better

 

[Burningaway]

For some odd reason I hate the thought of goodbye letters. I don't want them to read the letter thinking "oh god she was in so much pain"
I don't want them to think too much bout it :p

 

[AresCohere]

Depends, as they can serve many purposes. At least recently I've moved away from writing a note as I think it may not be the best for my situation, but it really depends on the person.

They can provide closure, but also point blame. If you point too much blame tho, you may be seen as a martyr of so sort, which is definitely not the view most of us are going for.

It's not meant to be symbolic, just an exit.

 

[pettyqueen]

Yes. If I lost someone I know to suicide I would want to know why they decided to go. Not knowing can be worse than the loss

 

[oh_no191]

It's always a personal thing imo. I think I want to just to ease my mom though. She worries a lot so. But completely up to you

 

[BornHated]

I don't have anyone close in my life that like... would actually be deeply affected. Any of my older friends who wonder where I went wouldn't benefit from knowing that I passed away. Only if I were to leave anything behind for them to pick up.
As far as my mother goes, she'd take actual pleasure in knowing I killed myself over her lifelong tyranny, so I don't intend on writing anything for her. It's pointless, she's nearly unable to feel guilt.

 

[Penguin44]

I know many people decide to leave some form of communication behind whether it be a text, note, etc… but after years of planning ctb methods I have never once felt compelled to write a note, I feel as if I simply have nothing left to say. Does anyone else feel that notes are unimportant as well? And if so why do you feel that way? People who do think it's important to say goodbye I'd like to hear your side as well.

I don't think it's that important. When I think about the reaction of those around me reading a note I would have left, I feel like it wouldn't be taken seriously... Like they wouldn't really believe what I had to say. That's just me, though, because of how those around me make me feel.

 

[lawlietsph]

I only know in my case it's not important at all. I tried to say a lot of things to people and I've tried to ask for help many times in my life but they never cared. So it wouldn't mean anything to them if I wrote down my pain, reasons, etc... I only have my parents and my sister but they don't love me at all. They never loved me and I am unwanted.
Maybe I would write some small letters to my little niece, as she gave me more love in her 3 years than my parents in my 27 years.
But anyway I can literally see that when they would find out about my passing, they would be happy (and also angry because they would have to pay for a funeral or some shit).
But overall they wouldn't care. I am just a waste of oxygen anyway.

 

[zipperstuck5171]

I have a note prepped just so they know it was not their fault, why I'm did it and they couldn't stop it.

 

[Huggs]

I feel similarly with having nothing left to say. I guess the main argument is trying to provide closure if you have people. But it probably doesn't eliminate the pain.
I've already written a lot of my thoughts out before and probably will use what I wrote.

 

[jazzcat]

I also think it might help if there's people who care about you, it might help with closure, I want to tell my parents it wasn't their fault and I want to say goodbye to my online friends so they don't think I cut them off or wonder what happened to me

 

[delusionalgirl]

I have nothing to say to those who caused the original traumas. There are a couple friends that will get an explanation as to why they don't need to see what happens when my dementia progresses. My note is basically just "choice made in free will." This changes depending on my mood. Police get a note too explaining what I used and make sure other methods are in site. With an apology for wasting police time.

 

[277]

"no funeral"

 

[PinkyStat]

It is very selfish from my part but, even though i support people leaving a note, i will not , i dont want people to question what are my reasons but i REALLY dont want people to think that my reasons were stupid or ''not enough''

 

[Freyja13]

I know many people decide to leave some form of communication behind whether it be a text, note, etc… but after years of planning ctb methods I have never once felt compelled to write a note, I feel as if I simply have nothing left to say. Does anyone else feel that notes are unimportant as well? And if so why do you feel that way? People who do think it's important to say goodbye I'd like to hear your side as well.

I thought about leaving a note or video journal or something for a while just in some vain hope that I could make people understand the pain that consumes me. I thought it would be important to leave something behind for the people I care about. But then I realised it might actually add to their pain and traumatise them more. I just think they might feel worse knowing that I didn't feel comfortable enough reaching out to them and telling them how I felt. So I've decided not to leave any last words or anything if I do decide to finally go through with it. Makes things a little easier anyway.