Discussion Do you have a stable job?

[strawberrygirl]

As a child, I've always thought that only smart, superior adults and parents are capable of magically earning money, and that having money will be a problem and out of reach for me. As a result, I always worry about how i would survive growing up.

Fast forward to adulthood, i've learnt that for most of us common people, we are to spend more than half of the day 'working' to making a living.. having suffered from anxiety and eating problems, a lot of things that affected me are actually communicating and eating with people(a large part of life, work and meetings in my country), also politics and looking and sounding presentable.. also answering calls.. teamwork.. feeling that my work is too lousy etc..

What are your stories about such issues and how do you cope with making a living?

 

[waterbottleman]

I used to have a stable job in IT that I quit 6 months ago for a variety of reasons that are too long to explain here. My reasons for quitting had little to do with personal reasons/issues and more to do with the business I worked at being dysfunctional and my boss being an extremely apathetic person.

I planned on getting a new job that is slightly different but had overlap with my old job, however I underestimated how severe my mental issues are and now I lack the energy, willpower, and motivation to find another job. Don't see the point of getting a job if I fundamentally don't see the purpose of living at all even with a job.

However I saved a ton of money in my 20s so now I live on my own in a decent apartment and can do so for 3 years or so without a job if I so desired (not that I want to do that, it's just that I can). So I've spent the last 6 months rotting away in loneliness and depression in my apartment (I did go on a vacation, but that didn't really help very much), although I was lonely at my job anyways, lonely when I was in college....so it's nothing new really if I think about it.

Doesnt matter though cause I'll be killing myself soon anyways. I'm broken and dead on the inside, there is nothing for me in this life beyond at best mediocrity and as far "at worst" I am discovering that there truly is no bottom when it comes to serious depression.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

"My grandmother is a wonderful person,she taught me how to play the game monopoly. She understood the name of the game was to acquire. She would accumulate everything she could and eventually she became master of the board, and in every game she would take my last pound and i would quit in utter defeat. And then she would always say the same thing to me,she would look at me and she would say "one day you will learn to play the game." One summer i played monopoly with a neighbor. We played almost everyday, all day long, we would play monopoly for hours. And that summer i learnt to play the game. I understood the only way to win was to make a complete commitment to acquisition , I came to understand that money and possessions was the way that you keep score. And by the end of that summer I was more ruthless than my grandmother. I was ready to bend the rules if I had to to win that game. I sat down with her to play that winter. I took everything she had , I destroyed her financially, psychologically, and watched her give her last pound and quit in utter defeat. And then she had one more thing to teach me. then she said now it all goes back in the box all those houses and hotels, all the railroads and utility companies, all that property and all that wonderful money and now it all goes back in the box. I didn't want it to go back in the box. She said none of it was really yours, you got yourself all heated up for a while but it was around along time before you sat down at the board and it will be here after you have gone, players come and players go, but it all goes back in the box. Houses and cars, titles and clothes,even your body because the fact is everything I clutch and consume and hold is going to go back in the box and I'm going to lose it all. You have to ask yourself when you get that ultimate promotion, make the ultimate purchase, when you buy the ultimate home, when you have stored up financial security , when you have climbed the ladder to the highest point of success and the thrill wears off , and it will wear off THEN WHAT?? How long do you have to walk down that road before you see where it leads, surely you understand it will never be enough , so ask yourself the question WHAT MATTERS?"

- Zeitgeist

 

[TAW122]

No I didn't. When I worked in 2019 (last year), I had two short term jobs, one was like an internship of some sort that lasted for 4 months and another one was a temporary job that lasted for a bit more than 6+ months. I am currently unemployed at the moment and just biding my time until I CTB. I had been on and off suicidal in 2019, going between active and passive, however in 2020, it may be my last year depending on how things play out. At any rate, I don't plan to live for a long time (years or decades) as life just sucks in general, but I digress.

 

[Onomotopoeia]

I guess you might call my job "stable" i've been there almost a decade now. It does not feel stable however, there are layoffs every year and while my title has not changed in a while my job changes semi-frequently.

If i'm being honest I really do not cope well at all, yet somehow I maintain some semblance of normality but that is mostly on account of my job being a mostly solitary practice.

My job being mostly solo and the fact that I can work from home really alleviate a lot of the stress so that is probably the only reason I manage. I never worked anywhere longer than a year prior to this job, and i almost didnt make it through my first position with this company for similar reasons.

I guess you might say I lucked out on the job front, it's likely while i'm still here. Life is no picnic but not struggling to feed myself is without question the only reason i'm still here, i'm not sure that's better tbh but i'm to much of a pansy to risk walking away.

 

[Aleandra Felix]

Never had a job or any source of income in my life. Eveyrhing I need is paid and controlled by my nascisisst mom and this is one of the reason I wanna CTB

 

[Roberto]

I'm a stable jobless. I've been working 17 years. And the last 3 months in the last 5 years.
I don't know what happens to me. I don't want to work. I get mad with pressure. I don't to feel slow, worst than my colleges anymore. I don't want to be angry with others at job. I don't want to defend myself from injustice, without a valid argument. I just want to forget.

 

[Phill]

The job I have now is probably the most stable job I've ever had. All the jobs I had before sucked and I never lasted more than two months in any of them. I must also say that social anxiety never helped that much. I am now in the same job for about three years. It doesn't pay so well, but at least I feel comfortable working there.