Venting Do you annoy people by being depressed?

[struggles_inc]

Recently I found it really hard to talk to people. Like, I literally don't want to say anything at all sometimes. That annoys the shit out of my family and usually ends up in a heated, yet one-sided argument (a person yells and me and hangs up).

Idk what to do about it. People share stories I genuinely don't care about and tell stuff I don't listen to. I just can't get myself to care enough about all that. I nod and try to reply, but my replies come out half-assed. I don't give a fuck even about important topics like money.

That gets others really offended. I mean, I understand why and I say I'm sorry, but I just can't handle the screaming anymore. I'm so done with all the stupid fucking hysteria and I sincerely want to be left alone for a couple months.

Can anyone please relate?

 

[SomePeacePlease]

I'm sorry you experience this.

I can relate. My parents are very "good" at telling me how much my depression and suicidal thoughts affect them.

I've stopped talking to them about it, and just trying to embrace being alone with the plans, and put up the best facade I can.

 

[struggles_inc]

I'm sorry you experience this.

I can relate. My parents are very "good" at telling me how much my depression and suicidal thoughts affect them.

I've stopped talking to them about it, and just trying to embrace being alone with the plans, and put up the best facade I can.

So true. I don't want to cause harm to my family, but I wish they could just back off if they don't want to be supportive.

 

[divinemistress36]

My parents are sick of hearing about my depression all the time . People dont want to hear about it. I relate that Idgaf about all the superficial stuff people talk about either

 

[yxmux]

I think I tend to be more annoyed at people than people are annoyed at me. I notice sometimes when I find myself annoying or offending people, especially on accident, I tend to immediately and intentionally double down on them for some reason. It's like one of my eccentricities or something. I think it may have happened more when I was younger, but it was never really significant or "defiant" and was mostly infrequent, especially since I'm very reserved and always have been. I have predominantly inattentive ADHD for context.

That's outside of the point of this thread though. Even then, I don't really think I talk about my problems all that much anyways, and I tend to be able to remain unnoticed by most people. My parents seem to be different in that they tend to emotionally monitor be though, which does annoy me, and I suppose that irritates them as well.

 

[mattoman]

That's honestly terrible to hear if your parents aren't understanding, sorry to hear that :( I don't know, I'm overjoyed so I guess that somewhat hides my deepest feelings. I don't know if that's annoying to people though, might be.

I have really mixed feelings about telling others about depression, yes I understand it's difficult to hear it, but what annoys me is that when you're really down and wanting to ctb the response is "why haven't you said anything?" Well, yeah, I wonder why. When I tried to reach out, I'm being annoying and no one wants to care, but once I'm ready to do the act that has no return, then suddenly people care. It seems it's a really fine line what you can tell without "being annoying". Don't know if others have similar thing.

I guess I'm just tired of people pretending to care, I mean if you don't care, just say it, even that hurts less than someone pretending to care.

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

To the point of dyslogia/alogia? From my experience it comes across as if you don't care by not responding or giving only responses of few words. Because if you actually cared you'd care more and have more to say right? No, not really. If you could, you would (say more) right? Yeah so if I were you, I would mention briefly how you've been having a really difficult time generating thoughts, and those thoughts into words, at the same pace, and with the same vigor, that you used to because of your low mood. That you've noticed your verbal skills declining and how it can seem like you are insensitive because you don't contribute to the conversation, when in actuality, it's that you actually physically can't. That there's a disconnect that's slowing you down and that it's not personal; and that that's why they're only getting so-called "half ass" responses. That it's all you have right now and you're sorry if it appeared as if you're not interested or if it came off that you thought what they said is important. Also that it's hard enough to even focus on the important things, but that everyday details have lost their appeal and just seem beige and mundane.

If you said something to whoever (I'm assuming it's a parent or two.) showing that you're aware, there's a good chance they'll keep this new insight in mind when they talk to you and expect less. Although it may take telling them a few times for it to sink in. Helps to mention it casually and not come across as defensive (especially if they do) when bringing it up. Hth