It's hard to describe, I always look forward to summer when I think I can get better, but it is always the most terrible time of the whole year. Seeing other people live, not being able to take part, watching my life fade away.
BurningLights
He killed himself with his own mind
- Jul 2, 2018
- 709
Wow, I'm not the only one. Social anxiety is even worse because there is people everywhere, summer comes and just wish it to be winter again. Don't have to see anyone then.
It's the only moment in the year when I don't feel the impulse of stabbing myself the whole day.
Just sometimes.
Just sometimes.
No, I feel the worst in winter when it's dark and cold all the time. I dread the Christmas too, it's a grim reminder that I will never have a normal, loving family.
Summer makes me feel a little bit better.
Summer makes me feel a little bit better.
Samuel
Wise
- Apr 25, 2018
- 243
JayZT
Member
- Jul 12, 2018
- 96
I'm self conscious about my weight, my parents constantly shout at me telling me I'm getting to thin and they're forcing me to go to a doctor. This just makes my anxiety worse when outside, in Winter I can wear a jacket and hide everything but my parents are constantly forcing me to go out and in this weather I can only wear a top, I can't stand summer.
skyofAuroras
Student
- Apr 10, 2018
- 136
Summer has always been the worst time of the year for me. Everything just feels so hot and suffocating. I feel much better when it's cold and I'm able to cuddle up in my favorite hoodie. Also my birthday is in summer so that probably has to do with why I hate it.
Jerryman
Member
- Jul 19, 2018
- 93
Also in winter I feel like I've got a year done, another year done 45ish left to go till the holy grail natural death.
Volatile
God
- Jun 18, 2018
- 1,286
Summer makes me wish I was dead. Due to climate change, every summer is going to get hotter and hotter
Yeah seems like it.. everythings drying out here atm
(2017 was pretty unremarkable but 2018 is going to end up in this "hit list" as well)
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Yeah, summer used to be a really exciting time. I mountain biked at a pretty high level for years and the spring/summer/fall time was filled with fun. Mostly lonely fun. But I was out and doing something. But even during those years, there were periods when I hated summer. Seeing people out and having fun. It hurt me to know I didn't function like them and that the social connectedness I saw wasn't ever going to be mine.
I'm miserable no matter what season it is. I remember looking forward to summer but now I look forward to death lol!
Ab-so-lutely. Couldn't have put it better. It's supposed to be the most fun time of the year when everybody is living it up and you're stuck inside being depressed. I know exactly how you feel. God, I hate this.
I hate summer, I hate winter. Most of all I hate autumn. Autumn represents dying, decline. I hate it. I hate it all, can't decide.
Dead_Inside
Wizard
- Jul 2, 2018
- 622
I think I understand that lonely fun ... do a lot of long distance trail running (which if fun to me) but I end up seeing a lot of families/ couples/happy friends out having adventures together.... I probably look too long trying to figure out what it is ... summer : (
Tomasnil
Mage
- Apr 24, 2018
- 519
FadedMemory
Student
- Aug 5, 2018
- 133
It's amazing how my favorite season in childhood became something i hate as a late teen. The heat makes me sleepy, since I grew in a shitty small town there's nothing to do here, and seeing all the happy people going on adventures makes me jealous.
I'd choose eternal winter over these hellish summer months any day.
I'd choose eternal winter over these hellish summer months any day.
BxK
Member
- Aug 20, 2018
- 38
I tried to kill myself two years ago around this same time, now want to do it again.
The summer hits hard for some reason. I don't even mind the heat, I work out in it all the time, but summer just...breaks my mood, well more than normal anyway!
The summer hits hard for some reason. I don't even mind the heat, I work out in it all the time, but summer just...breaks my mood, well more than normal anyway!
Nonexistence
Member
- Aug 12, 2018
- 45
Suicide rates peak in the summer months I believe...
Yeah, the world 'comes alive' and you just feel dead. The vile sunlight like life itself intruding into your bedroom every fucking morning when you just want to never wake up or get up again.
Christmas time and the lead up is pretty fucking revolting aswell though, especially if you work in retail.
Yeah, the world 'comes alive' and you just feel dead. The vile sunlight like life itself intruding into your bedroom every fucking morning when you just want to never wake up or get up again.
Christmas time and the lead up is pretty fucking revolting aswell though, especially if you work in retail.
the weather is too hot.. and i've been suicidal.. but for me, traditionally, christmas is the worst.
The only thing I hate about it is my older sibling coming back from college. Winter is my least favorite time.
I used to love summer, but that was when life for me was better. Now, as an impoverished older person, enduring a long hot and humid summer in a tiny apartment without a/c, it is living hell. As spring approaches, the thought of suffering through another summer is edging me closer towards the terminal bus.
Plankter
欠陥人
- Aug 14, 2018
- 174
Summer is the worst for me too. Everything becomes lively and life gets faster and overwhelming. The heat & excessive sunshine only makes it worse
I used to really like summer, but last year I experienced the worst episode of depression that I'd ever experienced and it lasted the whole summer and never really went away. This summer hasn't been as bad but I can never look at it the same way again. And yet for some reason I still miss summer when it's gone. I don't even know what triggered that episode of depression, I was fine that winter and then randomly got slammed one day in May. It didn't used to be this bad.
I live in Florida, so it's summer ten months of the year.
So yeah, fuck summer.
So yeah, fuck summer.
Mynameisnotimportant
4 years recovered. SS Vetran
- Aug 21, 2018
- 112
I thought summer was going to be better, but I just ended up between too depressed to get out of bed and working 12 hour days constantly. I thought school would be better because I would actually have friends but my friend group fell apart and every class I am reminded that everyone else is happy and I am not nor will ever be.
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