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Oblivion

Oblivion

Wizard
Aug 2, 2018
633
Someone recently pointed me to the case of me being indifferent and not feeling bad no matter what happens in my life and my positive and feeling good all the time thing as being a disassociation disorder, i don't know if this is true, i mean my life is a complete fucked up mess, i lost all my friends and i failed in every job i ever had and i keep failing in everything, i can't be normal with anyone and people always end up hating me, i'm a complete failure that no one likes with no job still living with my very stingy dad and his fucked up wife, and yet how do i feel? like everything is fucking perfect and i'm always excited for the next thing (what next fucking thing? i do nothing).

2 nights ago i discovered that i am my true self when i'm drunk, i get really sad and realize how fucked up my life is and feel what i really should be feeling.
 
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Reactions: TheSoulless, suffering, Ghost2211 and 4 others
Oblivion

Oblivion

Wizard
Aug 2, 2018
633
I started work recently and i started taking Ritalin so i can actually work, Ritalin has woke me up, I'm being depressed all the time, i am AWARE of how fucked up my life is, i can actually feel miserable about my friends leaving me and having no friends anymore and how sad miserable and lonely i am, funny that i needed a stimulant to wake up from the denial i was living in.
 
G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,015
I honestly don't know if it's better to feel or not feel the things we can't change or process. Now that you are able to feel these things do you feel you can work through those feelings or has it just brought misery where there was none before?
 
Oblivion

Oblivion

Wizard
Aug 2, 2018
633
I honestly don't know if it's better to feel or not feel the things we can't change or process. Now that you are able to feel these things do you feel you can work through those feelings or has it just brought misery where there was none before?
work through what? i want to feel as bad possible so I can finally do it
 
BipolarGuy

BipolarGuy

Enlightened
Aug 6, 2020
1,456
work through what? i want to feel as bad possible so I can finally do it
I've taken methylphenidate in the past.
It sharpens the mind, focuses the soul, and removes any haze that may be covering the mind's eye.

Anyway enough with that shit...

Do you think you may be able to use this focus to improve your situation for your child?
 
Oblivion

Oblivion

Wizard
Aug 2, 2018
633
Fair enough my friend ❤
Wow you just reached 2001 posts, angelic status now, nice.
I've taken methylphenidate in the past.
It sharpens the mind, focuses the soul, and removes any haze that may be covering the mind's eye.

Anyway enough with that shit...

Do you think you may be able to use this focus to improve your situation for your child?
did you feel tired, confused a bit and sleepy in the evening when you took it? and what child?
 

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