Deleted member 19654

Deleted member 19654

Working towards recovery.
Jul 9, 2020
1,628
Some days I'm okay and I feel good but it sort of lulls me into a false sense of security because before I know it, I get knocked off my feet again. I hate how my mood fluctuates and it's exhausting. I know if I wait it out, I'll start to feel okay again but I also know that it will be back. It's a fucking cycle. Anyone else relate?
 
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vacant_n

vacant_n

Member
Aug 13, 2020
41
It's the same for me but the cycles are shorter. Usually I'm completely inconsolable in the mornings, then after I cry for an hour or two I steadily improve until I feel like it's almost manageable. Then around mid afternoon it starts over again.
 
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Wisdom3_1-9

he/him/his
Jul 19, 2020
1,954
I think this is true for a lot of people. Sometimes our mood changes because of time of day, or because we encounter triggers, or sometimes — just because.

I wrote about this a week ago, I think. I go through these cycles, but each successive cycle seems to get worse. Perhaps best to end the cycle, but I can't seem to pull that proverbial trigger.
 
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Mr.AlphabetSays

New Member
Aug 12, 2020
2
For me, I'm usually really depressed before I go to sleep and then feel better when I wake up. Although sometimes I'll go a few straight days feeling depressed and suicidal.
 
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StupidLizard

StupidLizard

snake charmer
Feb 21, 2019
45
I am always in a state of feeling passively suicidal. I think of it less as a cycle, but rather a fluctuation of severity.
 
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GravityUtilizer

GravityUtilizer

Born to lose
May 22, 2020
737
From Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel:

'I told her about the black wave, that the feeling was literally physical, that the sensation was palpable, as if I'd drunk a bottle of tequila...' (128)

I can relate, yeah.
 
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