Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,983
They are driving me nuts. I was financially irresponsible the past couple of years and now I am paying the price. My phone is ringing off the hook and they are constantly emailing and texting me and leaving me ominous voice mails. I think I am going to be sued but I am flat broke and have too much anxiety to deal with it or show up for any potential court dates.

I can't stand being in the gutter like this and always having to worry about money. It's driving me round the bend. It is one of the main reasons for my major depression/desire to ctb. Anyone else in a similar position?
 
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Xerxes

Xerxes

Invisible
Nov 8, 2018
936
I used to get them but only because they associated my number with someone else. So I get these strange calls from lawyers looking for this guy and I tell them, I'm not this Jeremy dude. It goes from polite to "we know who you are, come quietly or we will put out a search warrant for your arrest". But nothing is worse than having Comcast call you everyday, countless of times asking you to upgrade to a better service.
 
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Johnnythefox

Johnnythefox

Que sera sera
Nov 11, 2018
3,129
Don't you have the option to declare bankruptcy? It's more or less what I did some years ago.
 
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Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,983
Don't you have the option to declare bankruptcy? It's more or less what I did some years ago.
I suppose on paper that would be the way to go, I'm just so bad about handling things in real life. Once I x out of this site, I am every ounce my username. Knowing that I'll always need help doing things has been one of the worst realizations of my life.
 
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Johnnythefox

Johnnythefox

Que sera sera
Nov 11, 2018
3,129
I suppose on paper that would be the way to go, I'm just so bad about handling things in real life. Once I x out of this site, I am every ounce my username. Realizing that I'll always need help doing things has been one of the worst realizations of my life.
We have what's called a trust deed in Scotland, I think it's unique to Scotland and it's one step away from bankruptcy.
 
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Smilla

Smilla

Visionary
Apr 30, 2018
2,549
Used to be a CPA. Please look into bankruptcy, it's nothing to be ashamed about and will give you a clean slate, plus peace of mind because legally they won't be able to harass you anymore.
 
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A

Asdr5633

Member
Jan 1, 2019
37
How much are you in debt if you don't mind me asking?
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
Don't torture yourself for not being able to not manage finances, ffs probably 98% of people with mental health problems can't handle finances. Sometimes day to day living even when you're in a roll in younger years is tricky enough - let alone when the deep depression hits later.

In the U.K. We have citizens advice @Johnnythefox do you know what there might be equivalent over there? They give free advice and can speak to people on your behalf so you don't have to deal with sht like that basically.

As for ctb over financial problems. No. Do not give the winkers the satisfaction! Ctb only if, as and when your heart truly desires - not because some shark is bullying you for your last cent. Xxxxxxxxxx
 
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Johnnythefox

Johnnythefox

Que sera sera
Nov 11, 2018
3,129
probably 98% of people with mental health problems can't handle finances
I would expand that to include the general population as a whole.
I've no idea about the equivalent of citizens advice in the US. There was a lawyer on here, I don't know if he still comes on.
 
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Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,983
I guess I am worried about not being able to qualify for anything again if I file for bankruptcy. Everything from a cell phone plan to renting an apartment would be more difficult, as far as I know. But I may not have a choice.

It's really just one of several reasons I am done with everything. Those who know me a bit on here know I also have quite a few other things going on.

I also doubt my ability to get any of this rectified. When life gets difficult/threatening in any way, I tend to avoid it completely. I feel trembly even making a phone call to a company. I think some part of me never really grew up, because I shirk everything that is tricky to handle due to anxiety/feelings of ineptitude.
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
There has got to be a way round it while avoiding bankruptcy. I know what you mean about maintaining your integrity regarding credit rating etc

You need someone to deal with them on your behalf @ReadyasEver got any ideas? You're good at that sort of thing. They may accept a payment plan. It's totally normal to get into a complete state of anxiety over this sort of thing - I used to work in PR and all that entailed then after I got ill I couldn't even pick up a phone. Even now I'd rather email than speak to someone.
 
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mattwitt

mattwitt

# 978
Jun 28, 2018
2,307
I would expand that to include the general population as a whole.
I've no idea about the equivalent of citizens advice in the US. There was a lawyer on here, I don't know if he still comes on.
Theres a million bankruptcy lawyers in America who offer 30 minute free consultations about filing bankruptcy.
 
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Aesthler

Aesthler

Death is the only God who comes when you call
Sep 25, 2018
416
I guess I am worried about not being able to qualify for anything again if I file for bankruptcy. Everything from a cell phone plan to renting an apartment would be more difficult, as far as I know. But I may not have a choice.

It's really just one of several reasons I am done with everything. Those who know me a bit on here know I also have quite a few other things going on.

I also doubt my ability to get any of this rectified. When life gets difficult/threatening in any way, I tend to avoid it completely. I feel trembly even making a phone call to a company. I think some part of me never really grew up, because I shirk everything that is tricky to handle due to anxiety/feelings of ineptitude.

Temporarily you'll have more difficulties with these things, all you really gotta do is end up getting a 300 secure credit card after the bankruptcy and in the future and use it wisely for a few years and you'll be back on track to good credit. I helped my ex go through a bankruptcy and it's been a little over two years and she's nearing the point where she could buy a house with her credit.
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
Hi.
Financial struggles can lead to so much anxiety.please seek some guidence and help before it goes to the court stage.
Theres no shame in asking for professional help.In the uk ,there is a welfare officer that helped me who was attached to the mental health team.
Consolidation of debts would put all your debts into one place where you could pay a sensible and an afordable repayment.
Bankruptcy is other option and would enable you to wipe the slate clean.
My brother had to declare bankruptcy - it does prevent you from having credit ie credit cards,mortgage,loans etc but i can say that he now owns two successful business,has a lovely house and is doing well for himself.lots of people make poor finincial decisions especially when other stuff is going on so dont be too hard on yourself.
Please research and look at your options but doing nothing is no longer a valid option or a situation to be ignored.
I really wish you well in getting back on track xx
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
Also Carebear, try not let the things that go wrong define you, You are not your mistakes. You have to forgive yourself and not buy into believing you are the mistakes. Because you're not.

You are a person; a human living, a loving breathing soul with a heart as big as Brazil, a kind manner and sweet nature.

This is just a temporary glitch. The first step is finding either a free lawyer or someone who will speak to these people on your behalf. Have a google. Send some emails. No phoning. All Will Be Well. If they bother you - we will send a posse round :-)

Everyone makes mistakes - Alan Sugar the weird multi millionaire man was declared bankrupt before he made it

Simon Cowell same

The man with the wig

Anyway, we love you xxxx
 
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Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
They are driving me nuts. I was financially irresponsible the past couple of years and now I am paying the price. My phone is ringing off the hook and they are constantly emailing and texting me and leaving me ominous voice mails. I think I am going to be sued but I am flat broke and have too much anxiety to deal with it or show up for any potential court dates.

I can't stand being in the gutter like this and always having to worry about money. It's driving me round the bend. It is one of the main reasons for my major depression/desire to ctb. Anyone else in a similar position?
Yes, financial stress is a major reason I want to ctb. I basically quit trying to pay off debt because I needed to be able to afford the basics to live. I don't have bill collectors but I've got other stress. Change your fone number lol! Just kidding I'm not sure what u can do to get the bill collectors to quit pestering u. I wish we could file bankruptcy on student loans. Since they decided to give me loans I wasn't sure I could pay back lol!
 
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Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I guess I am worried about not being able to qualify for anything again if I file for bankruptcy. Everything from a cell phone plan to renting an apartment would be more difficult, as far as I know. But I may not have a choice.

It's really just one of several reasons I am done with everything. Those who know me a bit on here know I also have quite a few other things going on.

I also doubt my ability to get any of this rectified. When life gets difficult/threatening in any way, I tend to avoid it completely. I feel trembly even making a phone call to a company. I think some part of me never really grew up, because I shirk everything that is tricky to handle due to anxiety/feelings of ineptitude.
I have the same issue. This is some of the same reasons I'm in my predicament as well. Just avoiding things that seem too difficult to resolve or handle. Some of these debt traps that exist now would not be available in a honest economic system. So most people would not even have debt because you would only be able to consume what you can pay for in the here and now. Or it could be set up in a way that debt didn't collect interest, and you knew that whatever contract u signed u could easily pay it back in a short time frame with 100% guarantee. Like the lender would not lend to u without a pretty solid guarantee that u can pay it off. Many people have no way of knowing if they will be alive in 30 yrs to pay off their home. It's so absurd. So much can happen in 30 years that could prevent u from being able to pay your home off, or misfortune can wipe u out. Then there u are losing your home. This is why unless you can buy it outright mostly, it's very risky to take on debt that takes years to pay back.
 
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mattwitt

mattwitt

# 978
Jun 28, 2018
2,307
I have the same issue. This is some of the same reasons I'm in my predicament as well. Just avoiding things that seem too difficult to resolve or handle. Some of these debt traps that exist now would not be available in a honest economic system. So most people would not even have debt because you would only be able to consume what you can pay for in the here and now. Or it could be set up in a way that debt didn't collect interest, and you knew that whatever contract u signed u could easily pay it back in a short time frame with 100% guarantee. Like the lender would not lend to u without a pretty solid guarantee that u can pay it off. Many people have no way of knowing if they will be alive in 30 yrs to pay off their home. It's so absurd. So much can happen in 30 years that could prevent u from being able to pay your home off, or misfortune can wipe u out. Then there u are losing your home. This is why unless you can buy it outright mostly, it's very risky to take on debt that takes years to pay back.
This is no lie... I got a student loan for this one school... I only went there for 3 days and left... by the time I paid off the loan it cost me 25,000.00 !!! That was back in 2001 and I probably didn't pay off the debt till around 2010 and it was suppose to be a 2 year loan. It basically kept me in debt and unable to get ahead in life for all of those years !!!
 
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killing me softly

killing me softly

don't wake me, i plan on sleeping in
Dec 28, 2018
171
I guess I am worried about not being able to qualify for anything again if I file for bankruptcy. Everything from a cell phone plan to renting an apartment would be more difficult, as far as I know. But I may not have a choice.

It's really just one of several reasons I am done with everything. Those who know me a bit on here know I also have quite a few other things going on.

I also doubt my ability to get any of this rectified. When life gets difficult/threatening in any way, I tend to avoid it completely. I feel trembly even making a phone call to a company. I think some part of me never really grew up, because I shirk everything that is tricky to handle due to anxiety/feelings of ineptitude.
i completely understand that avoidance tendency. i've been known to stick my head in the sand when i feel like i can't deal with something.

as for worrying about your credit qualifications i'm afraid to say that, from what you are describing, that ship has sailed. i speak from experience that even without declaring bankruptcy it is quite possible to end up with a credit history and score that will prevent you from being able to be approved for future car/home/credit card/etc purchases. the only way to get back on track is to take steps to resolve the situation, whether working out a payment schedule with your creditors or declaring bankruptcy. the best option depends on a few things and you should discuss with an expert before deciding.

as for the harassment, in the US there are federal laws to protect you. you have the option to tell them to no longer contact you by phone, by email, even by mail. while this does not stop them from pursuing the debt, you shouldn't have to change your number (which they very well may track down again, anyway).

here's a good primer on the law: https://www.consumerfinance.gov/ask...it-what-debt-collectors-can-say-or-do-en-329/
 
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Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,983
Thanks all, I've read through everything here and I'm appreciative of all the feedback. I'll work something out, I'm just kind of dreading it.
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
This is no lie... I got a student loan for this one school... I only went there for 3 days and left... by the time I paid off the loan it cost me 25,000.00 !!! That was back in 2001 and I probably didn't pay off the debt till around 2010 and it was suppose to be a 2 year loan. It basically kept me in debt and unable to get ahead in life for all of those years !!!
Yes, that was the whole point is to get u in debt. It used to be that people had to delay gratification, and save up for big things, but when they started to destroy sound money, the average person could no longer save money for big purchases like a house, car, starting a business, college, etc. I mean you could still save up for these things but only if u make a lot to begin with. Otherwise it would take you a very long time. You have to keep pace with rising cost of living. This stuff would not occur if you can't manipulate the money and create inflation. It's not going to be long before this system collapses so I'm not sure it's even worth trying to pay back certain debt. You're goin to be more worried about your most basic needs when shit hits the fan anyway. In your case, I bet u could have fought it and got it discharged since u left in just a few days.
 
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mattwitt

mattwitt

# 978
Jun 28, 2018
2,307
Yes, that was the whole point is to get u in debt. It used to be that people had to delay gratification, and save up for big things, but when they started to destroy sound money, the average person could no longer save money for big purchases like a house, car, starting a business, college, etc. I mean you could still save up for these things but only if u make a lot to begin with. Otherwise it would take you a very long time. You have to keep pace with rising cost of living. This stuff would not occur if you can't manipulate the money and create inflation. It's not going to be long before this system collapses so I'm not sure it's even worth trying to pay back certain debt. You're goin to be more worried about your most basic needs when shit hits the fan anyway. In your case, I bet u could have fought it and got it discharged since u left in just a few days.

I talked to 2 lawyers about it. One said he couldn't help me because it was student loan debt. And the other told me since it was in a different state that I had to get a lawyer from that state to look into it. So I just decided to put my head down and pay that off. What really screwed me was that I fell behind for a while at first because I didn't think I was going to have to pay it back. I was giving them like 250.00 a month or more but the loan company was hounding me really bad so I got another loan to pay them off and stop all of the harassment. it was a 5 year loan that's why it took almost 10 years to payoff and I ended up paying 3 X's the amount of the original loan.

And I've already had to stop making payments on 3 of my credit cards so I can afford the more important monthly bills and debts
 
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Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
That is the foundation upon which capitalism is built.
It's socialism that produces debt. We haven't had a free market in US since 1913 when they created the federal reserve. Ever since then they have been chipping away at the value of money. There's a book called The creature from Jekyll island, explains what's been going on behind the scenes. I haven't read it but I'd like to.
 
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Johnnythefox

Johnnythefox

Que sera sera
Nov 11, 2018
3,129
credit cards so I can afford the more important monthly bills and debts
I don't refer to them as credit cards, I prefer debt cards.
 
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mattwitt

mattwitt

# 978
Jun 28, 2018
2,307
It's socialism that produces debt. We haven't had a free market in US since 1913 when they created the federal reserve. Ever since then they have been chipping away at the value of money. There's a book called The creature from Jekyll island, explains what's been going on behind the scenes. I haven't read it but I'd like to.
I think the dollar is now worth .02 compared to how much it was worth in 1913
 
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Johnnythefox

Johnnythefox

Que sera sera
Nov 11, 2018
3,129
It's socialism that produces debt. We haven't had a free market in US since 1913 when they created the federal reserve. Ever since then they have been chipping away at the value of money. There's a book called The creature from Jekyll island, explains what's been going on behind the scenes. I haven't read it but I'd like to.
Screenshot 20190120 014943
 
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F

Final Escape

I’ve been here too long
Jul 8, 2018
4,348
I talked to 2 lawyers about it. One said he couldn't help me because it was student loan debt. And the other told me since it was in a different state that I had to get a lawyer from that state to look into it. So I just decided to put my head down and pay that off. What really screwed me was that I fell behind for a while at first because I didn't think I was going to have to pay it back. I was giving them like 250.00 a month or more but the loan company was hounding me really bad so I got another loan to pay them off and stop all of the harassment. it was a 5 year loan that's why it took almost 10 years to payoff and I ended up paying 3 X's the amount of the original loan.

And I've already had to stop making payments on 3 of my credit cards so I can afford the more important monthly bills and debts
Yea straight evil right there. There was no reason you should have been forced to pay for something you decided u had a change of heart early and still had to pay. Really messed up. But I have to give u credit for paying it back anyway. Many people just give up and avoid dealing with it.
 
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mattwitt

mattwitt

# 978
Jun 28, 2018
2,307
Yea straight evil right there. There was no reason you should have been forced to pay for something you decided u had a change of heart early and still had to pay. Really messed up. But I have to give u credit for paying it back anyway. Many people just give up and avoid dealing with it.
Thanks for saying that ! At one point back at that time I was probably 50,000.00 in debt and no job but I paid it back. And I wish I could pay back all the debt I have now but I don't think my body will let me. Paying off all of my debt is the one thing I wish I could do more than anything before I or If I really do ctb
 
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