Venting Dear Void

[DeathBecomesHer ☠]

Dear Black Void, Dark Abyss of my mind,

I am new here. Well, I've been a lurking for a couple weeks and decided to bite the bullet and make an account. This website brings me so much comfort. To see all these people communicating about a very "taboo" topic, openly and without judgment has brought me so much peace in the depths of my misery. I have tried... tried talking about it but I'm tired. I'm tired of existing. I'm only existing at this point for my family, but as selfish as it may sound, I didn't ask for this life. I have a beautiful life actually. That is the saddest part of all. I would be leaving behind so many that would be traumatized. I've seem the horror in their eyes after several failed suicide attempts. I saw the horror in their eyes when I was hit by the car and ran over... despite the miracle of only a concussion and minor injuries, I couldn't help but cry and wished I had died. Despite that our house is paid off COMPLETELY because of it, I still can't help but wish I had died. What is wrong with me???

 

[XYZ]

Welcome to SS

 

[sadworld]

Welcome friend

 

[JackieInTheBox]

Hello DeathBecomesHer, welcome to the forum. I can understand you're tired of existing, it's a great burden. And you're not selfish, everyone is just trying to make the best of life. I wish you will eventually find a way to alleviate your pain. Sadly, I cannot tell you how, because I am stuck too. But it's good to vent and let it all out.

 

[adios]

Welcome! It doesn't matter how you life looks... you'll never be considered selfish, regardless of whether you CTB or not. Everyone's problems are relative, and while some people might seem to have it worse, that doesn't mean your own struggle doesn't matter. I hope SS brings you some peace:)

 

[Ghost2211]

Welcome to the group. It's a pleasure to meet you. I like your cynical trash panda it's cute.

 

[almost_dead]

hallo

 

[nitroautnz]

Welcome among us!
Your not selfish and nothing is wrong with you, you have your own reason for wanting to ctb. Sadly when we do it we hurt the people we love but you can always find ways to make it easier for them