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Wisdom3_1-9

he/him/his
Jul 19, 2020
1,939
Earlier this week, I came up with a list of ten potential dates up to mid-January for me to ctb. The days were selected either because they would help to minimize impact on my family or because they were days of significance to me. Today is the first of those dates.

Honestly, I was thinking I'd likely get to more than halfway through the list before I'd be ready for another attempt, but things just seem to be building up. It was a really shitty week for me personally and my mind is currently consumed with thoughts of just ending it. If I did end up doing it tonight, there's lots I'd need to get done today. Yikes!
 
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Wisdom3_1-9

he/him/his
Jul 19, 2020
1,939
Well, it's past. Cried myself to sleep last night and that's how I dealt with my suffering. Was too tired to do anything else.

October 12 is my next date. Perhaps I'll feel more prepared then. Or who knows, perhaps life will be better...
 
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