Damn cowardice

[nonn_ee]

I wanted to try today. I realized my garage door might be strong enough to take me out. There are safety features on newer ones to make that less likely but I tried on a cardboard box and they didn't activate. I was going to try on my foot next, and if that worked my neck, but I chickened out.

I want to do it while the other person at home is out so there's no question of foul play but they were home, that was part of the reason, but a lot was fear.

I need to get past the fear. There's no other way out.

 

[FuneralCry]

Personally I really wish it's not so difficult to be free from this existence, I'm sorry you have to suffer. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[nonn_ee]

Well. I tried testing with a paint can and the garage door reversed. It was too good to be true. Guess I have to find another way.

 

[L'absent]

Here, let's call it fear rather than survival instinct. It is fear of pain and for some of the afterlife. Afterlife for those who believe it. We are terrified of pain and the possibility of remaining disabled, in a wheelchair like vegetables. Condemned to live and immobile. Complete suspension should be a greater guarantee, but nothing is 100% certain, except for very few very violent methods of committing suicide.