CTB tonight

[leftdreaming]

Was going to wait it out for another month, but my family decided they would bring me somewhere the week I was going to do it. Going to do it while I have the place to myself, partial hanging.

I don't plan to write any note, anything I say will just make my father grieve. Thanks for the support here while it lasted and those that made this possible. If you have what it takes to recover, then fight like hell. Otherwise, I hope you all find your peace.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm sorry that life brought you to this point. Wish you love and peace and may it be easy for you.

 

[Aisley]

So sorry you're here. God speed with this, and I hope you find peace.

 

[feder]

I think you should at least let them know it's not their fault(if it's the case). But regardless, wish you find your peace.

 

[Lilythefenfen]

I'm so sorry that your life has brought you here. Though it doesn't seem like much, I offer my love and condolences to you. Go off peacefully into an eternal beautiful sleep, beautiful angel. May it be the peace that you seek. Are there any happy memories you would like to share with everyone before you CTB? I like to remember everyone who passes through here so that way I'm filled with happy memories too when I CTB.

 

[inmyhead]

Sending you love and hope you find peace. Maybe leave something of a note behind so they know your reasonings and have some comfort when you're gone.

 

[leftdreaming]

I think you should at least let them know it's not their fault(if it's the case).

Maybe leave something of a note behind so they know your reasonings and have some comfort when you're gone.

I wrote a short note. Wasn't much, just "This is not your fault. I love you. Please take care of the cats." On a pink sticky note. Think stuffing it in a pocket will work, or will that not reach them? I don't want to have my father read something before knowing I'm dead, I want him to be able to take it in without the fear of where I am.

 

[bone bags]

Was going to wait it out for another month, but my family decided they would bring me somewhere the week I was going to do it. Going to do it while I have the place to myself, partial hanging.

I don't plan to write any note, anything I say will just make my father grieve. Thanks for the support here while it lasted and those that made this possible. If you have what it takes to recover, then fight like hell. Otherwise, I hope you all find your peace.

I'm so sorry the pain has led you to this decision, I really hope you rest easy and quick. Though I recommend writing at least a little note, I think your father would appreciate that or else he'd be left feeling guilty

 

[leftdreaming]

Are there any happy memories you would like to share with everyone before you CTB?

When I was in 8th grade, the substitute teacher fell asleep, so I went into a drawer and started tying all the rubber bands together. When I was done, I convinced a friend of mine to grab one end and see if it could reach the other side of the room and it actually did. Next thing I know she gets this evil look and lets go in this thing shoots back at me hard enough to knock me on the ground. It made me laugh so hard I started crying and everyone thought I'd been seriously injured. This doesn't sound like a happy story, but their faces were priceless! Totally deer and headlights at me then the sub who somehow slept through the commotion.

 

[lookingforsanctuary]

Wish you the best of luck. Anything you need to see/do before you go? Anything you will miss?

 

[gulp]

truly a shame
i wish you wouldn't do it

 

[OneLastLight]

Was going to wait it out for another month, but my family decided they would bring me somewhere the week I was going to do it. Going to do it while I have the place to myself, partial hanging.

I don't plan to write any note, anything I say will just make my father grieve. Thanks for the support here while it lasted and those that made this possible. If you have what it takes to recover, then fight like hell. Otherwise, I hope you all find your peace.

I'm sorry it got to this point. I've tried partial hanging multiple times - it's both easier and harder than it looks. If you don't end up CTB, do let us know.

Funny enough, you said something that I know will stick with me and might end up saving my life:

If you have what it takes to recover, then fight like hell.

I have what it takes to recover, but I am unable to decide whether it's worth it. This might be the sign I was looking for.

Whatever happens, I wish you the best @leftdreaming

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

Godspeed.

 

[leftdreaming]

Well, the time has arrived. Tears fall but not for myself.

I took this name because I like to daydream. I pretend to exercise and jog around my neighborhood for hours each day immersed in my dream land. I listen to music people make fun of and live a life that I will never have. In this world my name is Aiden. Aiden is a father and an elementary school teacher and Aiden loves his job. He helps out with volunteer work and assists with the food drive. He also as friends who support him when his depression gets too intense. Aiden had an outlet for his emotions and knew that there were people who loved him that reached out when he needed it most. Aiden was happy and loved. But Aiden isn't real.

In reality, I'm a girl who lies on her profile about being a man because I want to "chase my dreams" if you will. I don't know who I was fooling with the pink and the female avatar. I am a girl who failed her classes and got bullied in elementary school. I'm a girl who has social anxiety and can't maintain friendships and only thinks for herself. I am a girl with no friends. The only thing my dreams got right was my depression. This is reality.

I walked around one last time. It was silent. The dreams that I love so dearly that kept me alive this long aren't there for me. I feel truly alone now and I know it is time. Rest in peace, Aiden. Thank you for being by my side all these years.

 

[l0stc4use]

I'm sorry that it had to be this way for you. however, I hope you find the peace you are looking for <3

 

[Ontwon]

Hope you are at peace, much love

 

[Das Nichts]

I hope everything goes as you planned and that you will find your peace!

 

[Akanea]

I hope you will find peace at journey's end

 

[Shivali]

 

[silent star]

I hope you find the Peace you deserve

 

[▪︎⚠ ＫＯＨＩ ⚠▪︎]

I hope you find peace after all you have endure 'till today, you did good enduring all you have been going through.
Good luck.

 

[fakeimportance]

I really hope any pain endured is swift and that you feel at peace. I hope I can go soon too. If I do then I hope we see each other soon ♡

 

[inmyhead]

In case you see this because you failed, I just want to let you know that story about Aiden really moved me. Godspeed to you and Aiden.

 

[leftdreaming]

I chickened out. Had issues with situating the rope and SI kicked in enough to stop me from further trying. Sucked it up and texted my father everything and he was understanding and supportive. No psych ward or downplaying, he just came home, spoke with me, and we went out for strawberry pie and tea.

I think SaSu is worsening my depression, so I'm deleting my account. Going to try recovery with the help of my father. Hasn't helped before, but I want to stick it out for my parents. Thank you for the kind words, sorry it was wasted.

 

[SVEN]

Best wishes, one last time, LeftDreaming. I truly hope things somehow get better for you. Every good wish.

 

[offbeat]

I hope you find peace. I hope you rethink about leaving a note. A simple explanation for people around you about your situation would probably help them get through.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

All best wishes! You have a kind father and you are not alone, that's worth a lot!

 

[m1v]

I chickened out. Had issues with situating the rope and SI kicked in enough to stop me from further trying. Sucked it up and texted my father everything and he was understanding and supportive. No psych ward or downplaying, he just came home, spoke with me, and we went out for strawberry pie and tea.

I think SaSu is worsening my depression, so I'm deleting my account. Going to try recovery with the help of my father. Hasn't helped before, but I want to stick it out for my parents. Thank you for the kind words, sorry it was wasted.

Please stay strong. I know you got this, being in the recovery path isn't easy, it's kinda like fighting the final boss (that keeps healing lol) Nothing was wasted, reading about you made me realize that there's always an amazing person that has a story to share, behind each profile.

I hope you find the peace you're looking for, wherever you are. much love xoxo

 

[Shy_Shay]

i wish you the best of lucky in your recovery... reading this last thread made me want to cry soo hard!

 

[Zaphkiel]

All the best to you sweetie. Hope everything will be well