TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
Sorry if this is a bit long. I just want to be thorough.

Some of you might now I've just recently been released from involuntary admission at the hospital. Since then, I've felt my resolve grow stronger and I'm nearly at peace with my decision. My time at the hospital made me realize how much physical pain I'm actually able to tolerate.

I don't know when yet. But I have a few options:

  • Exit bag, sans inert gas. I'm in Australia and nitrogen seems rather difficult to obtain without raising too many questions. Helium I can get cheap and fairly easy, but most likely it won't be pure helium. So my plan is to take seroquel, then once I start getting sleepy I'd quickly duct-tape my arms together and then duct-tape an oven bag around my neck (I'm flexible, this is doable for me).
  • Antifreeze (ethylene glycol) poisoning. I know it won't be pleasant, but I'll take antiemetics and chug a liter of vodka-antifreeze cocktail, if I don't get found early I shouldn't survive, right?
  • Caffeine poisoning. I've bought two bottles of 100x100mg caffeine pills, i can crush them up and chug them with my morning coffee. No, it won't be pleasant, but given I already have messed up digestion and heart irregularities thanks to my coffee addiction, it should do the trick.
The next problem is the place. I won't do it at home because it's my boyfriend's family's home and I don't want to disrespect it. I might drive out of the city and do it in my car, but I'm wondering if that poses a risk of being found before I'm successful.

I don't know. Thoughts? Opinions? Well-wishes? Ill-wishes? I'll take anything.
 
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J

JohnDoe1

Arcanist
Sep 13, 2018
474
Have you tried Max Dog Brewing for Nitrogen? it's based in Australia...

the other 2 are terrible options...I wouldn't recommend them....
 
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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
Have you tried Max Dog Brewing for Nitrogen? it's based in Australia...

the other 2 are terrible options...I wouldn't recommend them....

Whoah. I can NOT afford that, and anyway that'll be far too conspicuous. Thank you for the suggestion though!
 
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J

JohnDoe1

Arcanist
Sep 13, 2018
474
Also, Seroquel is a pretty weak sedative....there's a high chance of you waking up, while you have a bag over your head...Try to get benzos...then this might work...
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
I've read a couple of cases of people taking the anti-freeze. Both, obviously, ended up in hospital as the pain etc is horrible but even in hospital it's not always treatable so they were made "comfortable" it seems and that's often as much as hospital can do. If that's the path you choose - be very very sure xx
 
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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
Also, Seroquel is a pretty weak sedative....there's a high chance of you waking up, while you have a bag over your head...Try to get benzos...then this might work...

Surprisingly, I'm benzo-resistant (apparently it's a genetic thing, like how some cats just don't react to catnip). But give me a 25mg seroquel and I'll stay asleep for 14 hours straight. The only other drug that used to knock me out pretty well was codeine, but it requires doctor prescription which I'm too lazy (and cheap) to get.
 
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Macc Lad

Macc Lad

Specialist
Jan 22, 2019
300
I've read a couple of cases of people taking the anti-freeze. Both, obviously, ended up in hospital as the pain etc is horrible but even in hospital it's not always treatable so they were made "comfortable" it seems and that's often as much as hospital can do. If that's the path you choose - be very very sure xx

what would the overdose of caffeine do? painful??
 
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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
what would the overdose of caffeine do? painful??

Yeah, it's supposed to be total agony and you don't die quickly. It can take days apparently. But it's one of the easiest options for me. :/
 
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Redt2go

Redt2go

flower child
Jan 5, 2019
1,643
Sheesh caffeine will suck ass I know you already know that but.... I considered it for a long time
 
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Macc Lad

Macc Lad

Specialist
Jan 22, 2019
300
Yeah, it's supposed to be total agony and you don't die quickly. It can take days apparently. But it's one of the easiest options for me. :/

think i'll skip that one then! good luck whatever you choose!
 
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J

JustAboutDone

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2019
3,532
Whatever you choose, there is a chance that you may not make it regardless of any hospital treatment so please don't spend three days writhing around in agony when you could be made comfortable in hospital. xx
 
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AndyCurious

AndyCurious

Warlock
Sep 13, 2018
707
Best wishes to you, hope you find peace, one way or the other..
 
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J

JohnDoe1

Arcanist
Sep 13, 2018
474
Surprisingly, I'm benzo-resistant (apparently it's a genetic thing, like how some cats just don't react to catnip). But give me a 25mg seroquel and I'll stay asleep for 14 hours straight. The only other drug that used to knock me out pretty well was codeine, but it requires doctor prescription which I'm too lazy (and cheap) to get.

I don't think, there is such a thing as benzo-resistance...maybe, you have a tolerance to the drug, in that case, you would need more of it, to achieve the desired effect...

The point is not to induce sleep, but instead, to induce a deep/coma-like sleep, which benzos are capable of inducing...seroquel won't do it...
 
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T

TheLastStraw

Member
May 10, 2018
55
This is just my opinion but all of those methods suck, they will either leave you in a lot of pain and if you do survive you would be so messed up you wouldn't even be able to end it

My first choice is always a gun, imo the next best 2 that are foolproof are hanging and jumping from a 20 story building, you absolutely won't survive either of these if done properly
 
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LastDay

LastDay

Soon, my dear big sister
Dec 29, 2018
103
@TheLastStraw Any idea how to land on your head? I always wondering that when it came to the jumping option.
 
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RememberWhatUCameFor

RememberWhatUCameFor

dont cry for me im already dead
Nov 20, 2018
590
to be honest i find all suggestions horrible

high chance of failure too. in fact im pretty convinced they wont work


what would be too suspicious about nitrogen? what about argon?
 
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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
I don't think, there is such a thing as benzo-resistance...maybe, you have a tolerance to the drug, in that case, you would need more of it, to achieve the desired effect...

No, it's a real thing that's been documented in scientific journals. Valium does nothing for me and I can't get stronger benzos out of hospital.

My first choice is always a gun, imo the next best 2 that are foolproof are hanging and jumping from a 20 story building, you absolutely won't survive either of these if done properly

I'm in Australia, strict gun laws here and I don't know anyone who owns any. There's a bridge in my city where most people jump but when that happens it tends to hold up traffic. I'm the one who wants to die, I don't need to inconvenience others. A little more inconvenience before it all ends doesn't matter much to me. I appreciate your take on it though. :)
 
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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
what would be too suspicious about nitrogen? what about argon?

It's not the buying part that's suspicious. It's hiding it from people I live with. Both options are also quite expensive (I saw around $200 minimum for a tank). l'm living on my boyfriend's money atm.
 
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WayOut

WayOut

Experienced
Oct 26, 2018
281
vodka-antifreeze cocktail
That'd be like a snake bite when venom is dispensed from one fang, and anti-venom from the other. Overall, not likely to do the job in a satisfactory way. Snake would go hungry.
 
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J.E. Morrow

J.E. Morrow

Member
Jan 8, 2019
71
What about SN method? Is it too difficult to get it in Australia? I think caffeine OD is the less reliable. And the Antifreeze poisoning sound painful.
 
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G

GeorgeEastman

Arcanist
Sep 3, 2018
470
I'd jump out in traffic before I'd do these.
 
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Purgatory

Purgatory

Oracle
Mar 21, 2018
142
I can tell you from experience that caffeine od is unlikely to work and pure misery! It begins with tremors and profuse sweating. And your sweat stinks like nothing I can compare it to. You feel hot and not even a cold shower will give you releif. Then abdominal pain. You won't be able to sit still, yet movement is difficult because you are doubled over in agony. Then vomiting and diareah. This antagonizes the abdominal pain and dehydrates you. By the time the vomiting began, the pills (that I crushed into powder) were no longer in my stomach. Nothing came up but bile. Then the symptoms of dehydration begin to set in. Pounding headache, insatiable thirst, loss of coordination, muscle spasms. I lasted 2 days before I could take no more and went to ER. I used 3 bottles of 80 pills, 200mg, crushed into powder and added to a large travel mug of coffee and drank it all in less than 5 minutes. Please don't put yourself through that. Not worth it. And once you injest it, you are along for the ride. No turning back. Pic is what I used. Just don't do it.
 

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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
That'd be like a snake bite when venom is dispensed from one fang, and anti-venom from the other. Overall, not likely to do the job in a satisfactory way. Snake would go hungry.

Uhh, can you elaborate? I don't understand. Thanks!
 
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TheRiverStyz

TheRiverStyz

Yes, that’s a typo.
Jan 16, 2019
100
I can tell you from experience that caffeine od is unlikely to work and pure misery! It begins with tremors and profuse sweating. And your sweat stinks like nothing I can compare it to. You feel hot and not even a cold shower will give you releif. Then abdominal pain. You won't be able to sit still, yet movement is difficult because you are doubled over in agony. Then vomiting and diareah. This antagonizes the abdominal pain and dehydrates you. By the time the vomiting began, the pills (that I crushed into powder) were no longer in my stomach. Nothing came up but bile. Then the symptoms of dehydration begin to set in. Pounding headache, insatiable thirst, loss of coordination, muscle spasms. I lasted 2 days before I could take no more and went to ER. I used 3 bottles of 80 pills, 200mg, crushed into powder and added to a large travel mug of coffee and drank it all in less than 5 minutes. Please don't put yourself through that. Not worth it. And once you injest it, you are along for the ride. No turning back. Pic is what I used. Just don't do it.

Oh, this is very informative. Thank you! I'll use it as my absolute last resort then. I've only been going by medical journals where the author(s) discuss(es) cases of death by caffeine overdose and most of them happened when it's ingested in pure powder form but I'm not sure where to find the pure powder form. I'm so sorry you went through that, how are you holding up now? Any permanent damage?
 
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WayOut

WayOut

Experienced
Oct 26, 2018
281
Uhh, can you elaborate? I don't understand. Thanks!
Ethanol is an antidote to antifreeze poisoning. Vets give it to pets that have been poisoned by ingesting antifreeze. In emergencies if ethanol is not available, alcohol does the trick. Given intravenously.
 
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Purgatory

Purgatory

Oracle
Mar 21, 2018
142
Oh, this is very informative. Thank you! I'll use it as my absolute last resort then. I've only been going by medical journals where the author(s) discuss(es) cases of death by caffeine overdose and most of them happened when it's ingested in pure powder form but I'm not sure where to find the pure powder form. I'm so sorry you went through that, how are you holding up now? Any permanent damage?
No permanent damage. Just a very bad memory of a horrible experience.
 
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Northerngirl1965

Student
Jan 23, 2019
126
What about SN method? Is it too difficult to get it in Australia? I think caffeine OD is the less reliable. And the Antifreeze poisoning sound painful.
I am going with SN. Have everything ordered
 
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G

GeorgeEastman

Arcanist
Sep 3, 2018
470
I drink 10 cans of pop a day. The caffeine may not kill me, but surely the acid is eating some nice holes in my stomach. And I may be in line for aspartame poisoning. Anything to shorten life. Let's eat those holes.
 
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