Venting CTB is selfish...

[Dead beat dad]

Just venting;
Yes. Yes it is.
But more to the point;
So what if it is?
Most of us are spinning around in this life without a f***ing clue, often confused and hurting with no idea of how or mechanism for which to fix it.
Heaven forbid someone do something for themselves, something they want to do, even if it means ending their life (and for so many this will mean their pain too).
If 'you' think it's selfish to CTB then don't do it with your own life, that judgement is respected, can 'you' be respectful of ours?
If not then I suggest 'you' take a look at the fabric of society and how 'you' re' woven in to it and ask;
How can 'I' help this person who is so selfish?
How can 'I' be the better person and build a kinder and more peaceful world for those 'I' 'love?'
Sound like hardwork?
Now who is selfish?

Love and respect friends.

DBD

 

[these_days9]

I hear what you're saying and understand the potential benefit of flipping the script. But I can't help feel a visceral reaction to this since it's the main tool used to make us feel guilt for who people that want to ctb are and what we want to do with our own lives and bodies. I guess it's also just so obvious to me that it's infinitely more selfish to want someone not to ctb just because you love them and will miss them. I know this is part of what you're saying and I don't think we disagree at all. It just makes me so annoyed and angry when people actually use this as a response when someone ctbs. Plus for a lot of people, they want to ctb, because they feel the world will be better without them or they are a burden. How could we use the word selfish for someone who feels that way? My heart breaks for everyone that has to feel this kind of pain. Maybe it's just that the word selfish has a negative connotation that it probably shouldn't. Doing something for yourself shouldn't be negative.

Sorry if this is just a jumble. Again I'm not disagreeing necessarily with your post. Just adding some random disjointed thoughts.

 

[Dead beat dad]

I hear what you're saying and understand the potential benefit of flipping the script. But I can't help feel a visceral reaction to this since it's the main tool used to make us feel guilt for who people that want to ctb are and what we want to do with our own lives and bodies. I guess it's also just so obvious to me that it's infinitely more selfish to want someone not to ctb just because you love them and will miss them. I know this is part of what you're saying and I don't think we disagree at all. It just makes me so annoyed and angry when people actually use this as a response when someone ctbs. Plus for a lot of people, they want to ctb, because they feel the world will be better without them or they are a burden. How could we use the word selfish for someone who feels that way? My heart breaks for everyone that has to feel this kind of pain. Maybe it's just that the word selfish has a negative connotation that it probably shouldn't. Doing something for yourself shouldn't be negative.

Sorry if this is just a jumble. Again I'm not disagreeing necessarily with your post. Just adding some random disjointed thoughts.

Thanks friend, I think you and I are on the same page, I respect what you say.
Love and respect
DBD

 

[Ghost2211]

I hear what you're saying and agree, but arguably in situations like mine it would be undeniably horrifically selfish. It's OK because one day there will be a time where it is selfish to a much lesser degree.

 

[Dead beat dad]

I hear what you're saying and agree, but arguably in situations like mine it would be undeniably horrifically selfish. It's OK because one day there will be a time where it is selfish to a much lesser degree.

I feel this and I expect that is the lamentable misery for many of us here who simply can't ctb, despite the pain of their circumstances.
Love and respect friend
DBD

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Almost every action is selfish, people only ever point it out when they want to use guilt as a weapon

 

[Kat!]

As long as all of the people around you are fucking awful then I think it's okay.

 

[_Kaira_]

My parent's selfishly decided to have more kids knowing one of their current ones was suffering and
slowly dying from a hereditary disease (He was gone a long time ago, no more suffering for him, poor kid..),
and yet they decided to go ahead and pop out another one because they wanted a daughter.

Then proceeded to control her, and if she didn't follow in line 100% she got beaten, emotionally scarred and mentally tormented.

I personally don't see what's wrong if I chose to CTB at this point.
My parents gave up any right to be sad if I committed suicide the moment they destroyed any potential 'normal' future for their child.

Everyone's situation is different. But I could never consider myself personally selfish for everything I've been through,
not just including the problematic circumstances involving my parents.

 

[Deleted member 23586]

I feel you! I understand what you're saying, but I choose to not associate myself to that word due to past trauma and abuse. But i'm here for this!

 

[justsad&done]

My parent's selfishly decided to have more kids knowing one of their current ones was suffering and
slowly dying from a hereditary disease, and yet they decided to go ahead and pop out another one because they wanted a daughter.

Then proceeded to control her, and if she didn't follow in line 100% she got beaten, emotionally scarred and mentally tormented.

I personally don't see what's wrong if I chose to CTB at this point.
My parents gave up any right to be sad if I committed suicide the moment they destroyed any potential 'normal' future for their child.

Everyone's situation is different. But I could never consider myself personally selfish for everything I've been through,
not just including the problematic circumstances involving my parents.

I am so sorry for your sadness and all you have been through...looking out for yourself is not selfish -- it's that you are taking care of yourself in the best way you can.