Resource Cryptonite's SN plan to inspire you

[Cryptonite]

Hey everyone,

in one of my previous posts, I promised that I would share my SN (sodium nitrite) plan. So here it is. This is not a long-term plan (i. e. it does not include writing a will, financial stuff, long-term mental preparation etc.). It is only for the last 24/48 hours. Modify the plan as you wish, according to your needs.

I find it very helpful to do a "trial" CTB before, in order to find any potential flaws in the plan. Also to desensitize yourself. To do that, just proceed with the steps, but instead of SN drink only, prepare SN drink along with a regular salt drink. Then drink only the regular salt.

---

Cryptonite's SN plan

1. 48h or 24h before: start taking 1x metoclopramide 10mg every 8 hours.
2. Do fasting: last meal 5-8 hrs before, after that only water in small amounts.
3. Prepare: SN and accompanying pills, weighing scale, 2 cups and spoons, letters, bucket/box for vomiting, water/tea/candy to suppress the taste of SN and other stuff you find necessary (in my case = sports equipment, memory, photos with important people in your life, medical records, a soft toy for emotional support). Make sure the bucket/box for vomiting is further from the rest of the stuff, in case you want to put some of the other items next to your bed.
4. Prepare headphones and an alternative music player (avoid devices which you can use for calling help, use an MP3 player, e-reader etc. instead) with your chosen song/playlist (should be neutral, to avoid any unwanted emotions such as fear, grief or sadness).
5. If you're doing the "trial" CBT, prepare clothes for safe SN handling (gloves, glasses, hat, scarf, mask, long-sleeve T-shirt, trousers), bag for clothes, empty plastic/garbage bags and disposable wipes (or toilet paper). Make sure SN is safely prepared and disposed of.
6. Prepare 2x SN drink 20 or 25g (1x SN and 1x regular salt 5g in case you're doing the "trial" CBT). It should be completely dissolved. Make sure no one else can access it. Use special clothes for "trial" CBT.
7. Now, this part should include something that you found to be helpful in mitigating your SI (survival instinct). In my case, it's an outdoor walk around the places I valued and lost due to my physical disease. Make sure it makes you suffer. Suffering is a very positive thing in this step.
8. Prevent being found and being heard: lock the door, close your windows and curtains, wipe and turn off your phone, wipe and turn off your PC. In the optimal case, no one is around.
9. Take propranolol (400mg), paracetamol/ibuprofen (twice the recommended dose), metoclopramide (3x 10mg pills), benzos of your choice (max dose you can still take without being unfocused to proceed with the following steps, e. g. for me 3mg alprazolam).
10. + 60 min: Take mouth/throat numbing lozenges with benzocaine to suppress the taste of SN.
11. + 15 min: Get courage and force yourself. Drink SN (a regular salt if you're doing the "trial" CBT + dispose of your SN).
12. Rinse your mouth with tea and/or suck on a candy (in case the mouth/throat numbing lozenges are not enough).
13. Lie down in bed with your music on. Make sure you find a way to prevent falling down.
14. Your troubles are gone. Well done. If you're doing the "trial" CBT, you will likely fall asleep from the effect of the pills.
15. In case you vomit, use the bucket/box for vomiting and drink the second SN.

---

I hope it inspires you in your journey towards successful CTB.

 

[FuneralCry]

Thank you for sharing your plan. I wish you freedom from your suffering for when the time is right to leave.

 

[Hope:-)]

Thanks. I was thinking of just listening to music on my laptop. Would that be too loud? Also, where exactly are you putting the vomit bucket? I'll be on the bed so if it's on the floor it may be too far away plus I may fall off the bed trying to vomit. Should I just put it next to me on the bed?

 

[Someone123]

There is one pretty big difference from Stan's Guide, which says no water or other liquid in the last two hours before the sn, except for the smallest possible amounts used to swallow pills. Stan's Guide says: "Avoid drinking anything two hours prior to drinking the SN. If you need to, then just plain water." It seems that the reason is to reduce risk of vomiting. SO I wouldn't take this out of the plan, this plan has worked well for many people.

 

[Cryptonite]

There is one pretty big difference from Stan's Guide, which says no water or other liquid in the last two hours before the sn, except for the smallest possible amounts used to swallow pills. Stan's Guide says: "Avoid drinking anything two hours prior to drinking the SN. If you need to, then just plain water." It seems that the reason is to reduce risk of vomiting. SO I wouldn't take this out of the plan, this plan has worked well for many people.

Thanks for your suggestion, I've edited it.

Thanks. I was thinking of just listening to music on my laptop. Would that be too loud? Also, where exactly are you putting the vomit bucket? I'll be on the bed so if it's on the floor it may be too far away plus I may fall off the bed trying to vomit. Should I just put it next to me on the bed?

I wouldn't recommend listening on your laptop. During the day, it'd be ok, but it would get suspicious at night.
I guess you can keep the bucket closer to you then.

 

[Hope:-)]

I'm fortunate in that I have a whole house to myself that night. I plan to attempt to take the sn at 12.30 am and play an hour long playlist. I don't think that's enough to get a noise complaint. Plus most people will be asleep. I think I've figured out somewhere to put the vomit bucket. I'll test it out. Thanks again x

 

[chaosandquiet]

Thank you for sharing your plan - so helpful. Wishing you nothing but comfort and a safe journey when the time comes. *Hugs*

Hey everyone,

in one of my previous posts, I promised that I would share my SN (sodium nitrite) plan. So here it is. This is not a long-term plan (i. e. it does not include writing a will, financial stuff, long-term mental preparation etc.). It is only for the last 24/48 hours. Modify the plan as you wish, according to your needs.

I find it very helpful to do a "trial" CTB before, in order to find any potential flaws in the plan. Also to desensitize yourself. To do that, just proceed with the steps, but instead of SN drink only, prepare SN drink along with a regular salt drink. Then drink only the regular salt.

---

Cryptonite's SN plan

1. 48h or 24h before: start taking 1x metoclopramide 10mg every 8 hours.
2. Do fasting: last meal 5-8 hrs before, after that only water in small amounts.
3. Prepare: SN and accompanying pills, weighing scale, 2 cups and spoons, letters, bucket/box for vomiting, water/tea/candy to suppress the taste of SN and other stuff you find necessary (in my case = sports equipment, memory, photos with important people in your life, medical records, a soft toy for emotional support). Make sure the bucket/box for vomiting is further from the rest of the stuff, in case you want to put some of the other items next to your bed.
4. Prepare headphones and an alternative music player (avoid devices which you can use for calling help, use an MP3 player, e-reader etc. instead) with your chosen song/playlist (should be neutral, to avoid any unwanted emotions such as fear, grief or sadness).
5. If you're doing the "trial" CBT, prepare clothes for safe SN handling (gloves, glasses, hat, scarf, mask, long-sleeve T-shirt, trousers), bag for clothes, empty plastic/garbage bags and disposable wipes (or toilet paper). Make sure SN is safely prepared and disposed of.
6. Prepare 2x SN drink 20 or 25g (1x SN and 1x regular salt 5g in case you're doing the "trial" CBT). It should be completely dissolved. Make sure no one else can access it. Use special clothes for "trial" CBT.
7. Now, this part should include something that you found to be helpful in mitigating your SI (survival instinct). In my case, it's an outdoor walk around the places I valued and lost due to my physical disease. Make sure it makes you suffer. Suffering is a very positive thing in this step.
8. Prevent being found and being heard: lock the door, close your windows and curtains, wipe and turn off your phone, wipe and turn off your PC. In the optimal case, no one is around.
9. Take propranolol (400mg), paracetamol/ibuprofen (twice the recommended dose), metoclopramide (3x 10mg pills), benzos of your choice (max dose you can still take without being unfocused to proceed with the following steps, e. g. for me 3mg alprazolam).
10. + 60 min: Take mouth/throat numbing lozenges with benzocaine to suppress the taste of SN.
11. + 15 min: Get courage and force yourself. Drink SN (a regular salt if you're doing the "trial" CBT + dispose of your SN).
12. Rinse your mouth with tea and/or suck on a candy (in case the mouth/throat numbing lozenges are not enough).
13. Lie down in bed with your music on. Make sure you find a way to prevent falling down.
14. Your troubles are gone. Well done. If you're doing the "trial" CBT, you will likely fall asleep from the effect of the pills.
15. In case you vomit, use the bucket/box for vomiting and drink the second SN.

---

I hope it inspires you in your journey towards successful CTB.

Are you mixing in the propranolol (as the PPeH suggests) or taking the pills whole?

 

[Cryptonite]

Thank you for sharing your plan - so helpful. Wishing you nothing but comfort and a safe journey when the time comes. *Hugs*

Are you mixing in the propranolol (as the PPeH suggests) or taking the pills whole?

Thank you very much

I'd say it is not a good idea to mix propranolol with SN. Propranolol needs some time to start working, it's better to take it beforehand.

 

[Blackroom_57]

Thank you very much

I'd say it is not a good idea to mix propranolol with SN. Propranolol needs some time to start working, it's better to take it beforehand.

Do you have a date for your attempt? Do you really think you'll be able to go through with it?

 

[universe]

Thank you for sharing your protocol, I hope everything goes well for you. The question of the taste of the SN intrigues me but maybe some tablets will help for this purpose. Also, the idea of doing a "test", a "reconstruction" before the real attempt could help me to accept the thing.

Thank you very much for your help, good luck.

 

[Cryptonite]

Thank you for sharing your protocol, I hope everything goes well for you. The question of the taste of the SN intrigues me but maybe some tablets will help for this purpose. Also, the idea of doing a "test", a "reconstruction" before the real attempt could help me to accept the thing.

Thank you very much for your help, good luck.

You're more than welcome.

Lozenges with benzocaine will help against SN taste tremendously. Also, you can use a small candy or tea.

 

[Cryptonite]

Do you have a date for your attempt? Do you really think you'll be able to go through with it?

Not yet. I know I have to do that, I have no other choice. But you never know, when the day comes... I'm doing everything possible to make it successful.

Thanks for sharing your plan, it is validating to see lots of similar steps in your plan as mine. I think the "test runs" are a great idea to make it a more familiar process.

I plan on CTB in a hotel room, and I am definitely bringing comfort objects like my laptop, stuffed animals, my own pillows, etc. to help make the environment a little more familiar. My thought is the less foreign everything feels, the less likely I will panic and have the SI take over.

I will say the one variable I'd be concerned about is taking the 400mg propranolol on a trial run. That's a very high dose. I'm worried about excessive lightheadedness stopping me from downing the SN, so I personally am planning on 40mg-80mg an hour before. I do think you have the right idea taking it an hour before. You want to give it some time to work.

Thank you very much

I get you, but the problem is that the more you deviate from the real plan, the less "real" the trial will be. In order to find any flaws in the plan and to desensitize yourself, I'd recommend taking medication in the recommended amount.

My experience with 400mg propranolol is like this: it intensifies the effect of benzos. It will get you even calmer, number, but also sleepier. That's why it's important that you prepare everything beforehand and the only thing you need to do, at that stage, is drinking SN and going to the bed.

 

[Hollowillow]

Hey everyone,

in one of my previous posts, I promised that I would share my SN (sodium nitrite) plan. So here it is. This is not a long-term plan (i. e. it does not include writing a will, financial stuff, long-term mental preparation etc.). It is only for the last 24/48 hours. Modify the plan as you wish, according to your needs.

I find it very helpful to do a "trial" CTB before, in order to find any potential flaws in the plan. Also to desensitize yourself. To do that, just proceed with the steps, but instead of SN drink only, prepare SN drink along with a regular salt drink. Then drink only the regular salt.

---

Cryptonite's SN plan

1. 48h or 24h before: start taking 1x metoclopramide 10mg every 8 hours.
2. Do fasting: last meal 5-8 hrs before, after that only water in small amounts.
3. Prepare: SN and accompanying pills, weighing scale, 2 cups and spoons, letters, bucket/box for vomiting, water/tea/candy to suppress the taste of SN and other stuff you find necessary (in my case = sports equipment, memory, photos with important people in your life, medical records, a soft toy for emotional support). Make sure the bucket/box for vomiting is further from the rest of the stuff, in case you want to put some of the other items next to your bed.
4. Prepare headphones and an alternative music player (avoid devices which you can use for calling help, use an MP3 player, e-reader etc. instead) with your chosen song/playlist (should be neutral, to avoid any unwanted emotions such as fear, grief or sadness).
5. If you're doing the "trial" CBT, prepare clothes for safe SN handling (gloves, glasses, hat, scarf, mask, long-sleeve T-shirt, trousers), bag for clothes, empty plastic/garbage bags and disposable wipes (or toilet paper). Make sure SN is safely prepared and disposed of.
6. Prepare 2x SN drink 20 or 25g (1x SN and 1x regular salt 5g in case you're doing the "trial" CBT). It should be completely dissolved. Make sure no one else can access it. Use special clothes for "trial" CBT.
7. Now, this part should include something that you found to be helpful in mitigating your SI (survival instinct). In my case, it's an outdoor walk around the places I valued and lost due to my physical disease. Make sure it makes you suffer. Suffering is a very positive thing in this step.
8. Prevent being found and being heard: lock the door, close your windows and curtains, wipe and turn off your phone, wipe and turn off your PC. In the optimal case, no one is around.
9. Take propranolol (400mg), paracetamol/ibuprofen (twice the recommended dose), metoclopramide (3x 10mg pills), benzos of your choice (max dose you can still take without being unfocused to proceed with the following steps, e. g. for me 3mg alprazolam).
10. + 60 min: Take mouth/throat numbing lozenges with benzocaine to suppress the taste of SN.
11. + 15 min: Get courage and force yourself. Drink SN (a regular salt if you're doing the "trial" CBT + dispose of your SN).
12. Rinse your mouth with tea and/or suck on a candy (in case the mouth/throat numbing lozenges are not enough).
13. Lie down in bed with your music on. Make sure you find a way to prevent falling down.
14. Your troubles are gone. Well done. If you're doing the "trial" CBT, you will likely fall asleep from the effect of the pills.
15. In case you vomit, use the bucket/box for vomiting and drink the second SN.

---

I hope it inspires you in your journey towards successful CTB.

Is sn dangerous enough to ruin my clothes? I already did with an home made acid cleaner... A mask? Gloves? How dangerous is it?

I hope sn us deadlier than covid because the damn thing was just a flu

 

[Cryptonite]

Is sn dangerous enough to ruin my clothes? I already did with an home made acid cleaner... A mask? Gloves? How dangerous is it?

I hope sn us deadlier than covid because the damn thing was just a flu

It's not. In fact, many people can prepare it safely even without any clothes. This is just a precaution. Moderators of SS issued an official recommendation to stay safe when handling SN, I'm trying to follow their advice.