Considering selling my firearm on armslist

[Trashcan]

I've decided it's far too violent. I can wait to ctb. Life isn't too bad right now, it's more fear about the future. I would rather hang myself because it's simple, reliable, and far less violent. I also know the goal with the gun is to aim towards the brain stem, but I'm worried I would mess up with the angling and survive. And it just is not in me to do something violent. That's just not who I am. So I'm thinking of possibly selling it on armslist. It will also leave more money for my family if I ctb. I liked how it was instant, but realized I can just hang myself when I'm home alone. I don't think I'd regret this decision. I want that firearm out of the house. I hate firearms. I know I'm a mess and I keep going back and forth between wanting to ctb and wanting to give life a try... and I've realized I just don't have it in me to shoot myself. It's hard to do full suspension hanging which I could even back out of due to the pull bar, but with a firearm... I'm not as impulsive as I used to be. As a teenager, I might have been able to do that because I was very impulsive. Now I think everything through and overthink everything (as you may have noticed), so I can't see myself impulsively shooting myself - and it would need to be an impulse. It wouldn't happen otherwise. I might also sell the left of black powder, bullets, and primer, or maybe even give them away for free with the firearm.

 

[ningaman151]

Afaik any method other than nembutal is risky. Shotgun appears to be the most reliable though. You could survive hanging you know, and it won't be pretty. I'm not recommending anything but alcohol might do the trick, although it could reduce your accuracy. Also everyone claims to know it all and recommend a different way of shooting yourself. I don't know who to follow.

 

[Trashcan]

Afaik any method other than nembutal is risky. Shotgun appears to be the most reliable though. You could survive hanging you know, and it won't be pretty. I'm not recommending anything but alcohol might do the trick, although it could reduce your accuracy. Also everyone claims to know it all and recommend a different way of shooting yourself. I don't know who to follow.

Agreed. I just don't know enough about firearms to make sure I do this well. It's also not a shotgun (banned for life), but rather a muzzleloader. As for hanging, I have a support that supports my weight, I have a rope that supports my weight. I would just need to be home alone for an hour, that happens sometimes. I might even get to be home alone for a few days this upcoming week. I liked the idea of N, but I don't have $600.

 

[Schopenhauer]

I agree that you should sell it. If you're not comfortable with a firearm, it's better not having it around. It's indeed a very violent way of going out. It takes a lot of courage to do it deliberately (impulsive suicides are another matter, but then there's the potential mishaps).

Regarding N, 600 isn't that much. You can probably save this amount quickly enough. If you're in the US, A's track record is excellent. Everyone gets their very quickly.

 

[TiredHorse]

If you're not comfortable with firearms, definitely sell it. With the money you get from it you could probably put together a good n2 setup: tank, regulator, tubing, bag. Much less violent.

I have guns, know guns, know how to do the job accurately (pistol: point it at your head behind your ear to take out the brainstem), but I don't intend to use one to ctb: too violent. I have one hidden, in case some busybody sections me and I get out of the can to find my tank of n2 gone, and I need to ctb before I can restock n2, but it's a last resort.

More importantly, however, is that you're really examining your choice about whether you might still want to give life a try. That's the most important thing you can do, bar none. This is a very permanent path we're all looking down. Make sure it's the right one before you step out on it, because there's no turning back. I've flinched three times now, and while I regret/resent losing that drive/enthusiasm that brought me so close each time, that hesitation was important. At least that's what I tell myself. With any luck I'll ctb in the next couple weeks, knowing I really did think it through.

 

[Trashcan]

I agree that you should sell it. If you're not comfortable with a firearm, it's better not having it around. It's indeed a very violent way of going out. It takes a lot of courage to do it deliberately (impulsive suicides are another matter, but then there's the potential mishaps).

Regarding N, 600 isn't that much. You can probably save this amount quickly enough. If you're in the US, A's track record is excellent. Everyone gets their very quickly.

It would take me a few months to earn $600 (I'm also really bad about saving money) and I want to leave some money for my family.