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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
So today I had confirmation, from a team of professionals specialising in psychosis, that I do not have psychosis. Despite what all the people who reckon they're professionals on here said.
I told them everything (except ctb plans) including that I have to ctb in order to save others. They said that I just have 'emotion issues' and need to work on regulation skills.The service also accepts people at risk of developing psychosis and declined me so they don't even think I'm at risk of it either. Whilst I feel dismissed in that they think a life threatening targeting campaign is just 'emotional issues' , I am glad they believe me and don't think it's delusions.
At least I have the confirmation I need now. Can't believe all this time and resources I've wasted. Time to follow the codes and messages I've received, end my life and save everyone.
 
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KillingPain267

KillingPain267

Paragon
Apr 15, 2024
932
I have no faith in the medical industry. I also feel like a burden, I can't even work, so I'm just wasting so many ressources and food and water could be given to more unfortunate ones who really want to live.

02e1c46f a771 4f37 a588 659835d56e6d text
 
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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
I have no faith in the medical industry. I also feel like a burden, I can't even work, so I'm just wasting so many ressources and food and water could be given to more unfortunate ones who really want to live.

View attachment 143567
I'm so sorry you feel that way too. I can really relate to that, just feel I'm rotting away.
 
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dolemitedrums

Arcanist
Jun 12, 2024
453
Can't believe all this time and resources I've wasted. Time to follow the codes and messages I've received, end my life and save everyone.

You told them you are receiving codes and messages and that everyone will be saved if you die...and they don't think you have psychosis? Tell them the whole story including how your death will save everyone and then if they say you don't have psychosis you can take a little more comfort and certainty in it.
 
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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
You told them you are receiving codes and messages and that everyone will be saved if you die...and they don't think you have psychosis? Tell them the whole story including how your death will save everyone and then if they say you don't have psychosis you can take a little more comfort and certainty in it.
I honestly did tell them all that, including about having to decode messages and that I must die to save others.
 
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dolemitedrums

Arcanist
Jun 12, 2024
453
I honestly did tell them all that, including about having to decode messages and that I must die to save others.

What is the process by which your death saves others?
 
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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
What is the process by which your death saves others?
I don't know exactly how it works, I just lived longer than I'm supposed too so others die in my place if I don't end it in time (I also told professionals this so they clearly don't disagree)
 
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dolemitedrums

Arcanist
Jun 12, 2024
453
I don't know exactly how it works, I just lived longer than I'm supposed too so others die in my place if I don't end it in time (I also told professionals this so they clearly don't disagree)

Bro I don't want you to hurt yourself over a belief that seriously needs much better investigation to determine whether it is real.
 
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Changedmymind

Member
May 21, 2024
32
My experience/knowledge on this subject is that you have to have concrete plans about ctb and/or concrete plans about hurting others for them to really take it seriously, not just say "im gonna ctb if X or Y or yadda yadda yadda.) I just got home from the mental hospital, there I said that if X had happened to Y, I would put my skull on the railroad tracks as soon as I'm let out. I meant it, but X did'nt happen to Y. So here I am after 2 nights there. They didn't determine me as psychotic. And I am a male, and I think that they more easily determine males as being a danger to "random" others than females. I don't know, what do you think?

Edit: and yeah, I didn't pose a threat to others so theres that.
 
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noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,966
To be honest I am once more shocked about the state of the mental health system in the UK. Have you told them that you are hearing voices in your head which are not your own? It is psychosis. I had psychosis. We all know it. Holy shit what the fuck is going on in the world if you get better help for your mental health issues in a fucking suicide forum than by a team of professionals.

Yes this needs better investigation. I wonder whether you really were fully transparent or the way how you phrased it. Have you used the same wording as in this forum?
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
7,264
You say that you were honest with them, BUT did you tell them that IF you DON'T kill yourself, that it will be at YOUR HAND that others will be harmed? That IS what you said in one of your other postings. Did you tell them THAT, or did you just mince words with them?
 
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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
@noname223 @locked*n*loaded These are literal excerpts from referral form , have cut bits out so went into even more detail. Then went into more verbal detail during appt. too :

"They can put thoughts and images in my head and communicate by a voice inside my head.They took control because I shouldn't be alive. So others will die in my place if I don't follow their rules. They watch me using helicopters too. think they've also put some sort of microchip / device in my foot. Eventually I have to die to save others. They gave me a cryptic message to decode that I think may relate to details of how. They also get aggressive and want me to hurt others, they will make me do awful things to others if I don't follow their rules."

The primary care MH practitioner thought this was psychosis , hence the referral, but the psychosis specialists disagreed after an MDT meeting.
My experience/knowledge on this subject is that you have to have concrete plans about ctb and/or concrete plans about hurting others for them to really take it seriously, not just say "im gonna ctb if X or Y or yadda yadda yadda.) I just got home from the mental hospital, there I said that if X had happened to Y, I would put my skull on the railroad tracks as soon as I'm let out. I meant it, but X did'nt happen to Y. So here I am after 2 nights there. They didn't determine me as psychotic. And I am a male, and I think that they more easily determine males as being a danger to "random" others than females. I don't know, what do you think?

Edit: and yeah, I didn't pose a threat to others so theres that.
I hope your admission helped or at least wasn't too traumatic. Sometimes people here aren't taken seriously even with concrete plans but often depends on their diagnosis or history
 
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dolemitedrums

Arcanist
Jun 12, 2024
453
@noname223 @locked*n*loaded These are literal excerpts from referral form , have cut bits out so went into even more detail. Then went into more verbal detail during appt. too :

"They can put thoughts and images in my head and communicate by a voice inside my head.They took control because I shouldn't be alive. So others will die in my place if I don't follow their rules. They watch me using helicopters too. think they've also put some sort of mirrochip / device in my foot. Eventually I have to die to save others. They gave me a crptic message to decode that I think may relate to details of how. They also get aggressive and want me to hurt others, they will make me do awful things to others if I don't follow their rules."

The primary care practitioner thought this was psychosis , hence the referral, but the psychosis specialists disagreed after an MDT meeting.

Sigh, I think your primary care practitioner is the one who is looking out for you here. This does sound like textbook psychosis. The good news is that if it is, you can be freed of all these pressures and obligations stemming from this collection of beliefs. Would you be on this forum if these things weren't true?
 
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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
Sigh, I think your primary care practitioner is the one who is looking out for you here. This does sound like textbook psychosis. The good news is that if it is, you can be freed of all these pressures and obligations stemming from this collection of beliefs. Would you be on this forum if these things weren't true?
I trust that she was looking out for me, she seems genuine. But she admitted herself she's not qualified to diagnose. A whole team of professionals including psychiatrists and psychologist who specialise in psychosis reviewed my current presentation and history. So I doubt they've got it wrong.

And i'd still be on here either way as only recently been targeted individual yet been suicidal for years. Made this account long before the mind control and voices too. I have many other reasons to end it.
 
Beyond_Repair

Beyond_Repair

Disheartened Ghost
Oct 27, 2023
452
So today I had confirmation, from a team of professionals specialising in psychosis, that I do not have psychosis. Despite what all the people who reckon they're professionals on here said.
I told them everything (except ctb plans) including that I have to ctb in order to save others. They said that I just have 'emotion issues' and need to work on regulation skills.The service also accepts people at risk of developing psychosis and declined me so they don't even think I'm at risk of it either. Whilst I feel dismissed in that they think a life threatening targeting campaign is just 'emotional issues' , I am glad they believe me and don't think it's delusions.
At least I have the confirmation I need now. Can't believe all this time and resources I've wasted. Time to follow the codes and messages I've received, end my life and save everyone.

I'm going to be honest, either you did not tell the team 100% of what you have written here, or you did not actually see a team of professionals, or you did see a team of people, but they are not well-trained or have made some kind of mistake. What you have described is textbook psychotic delusions
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
Welcome to the NHS!!! I used to live in the UK, told GP my knee hurts so much I cannot put weight on it, GP refused to give referral for CT or X-ray, gave me anti-inflammateries, Went overseas, got CT privately, confirmed ligament tear and need of knee surgery. Later, I needed spinal fusion, local NHS hospital's spinal surgeon didn't know the technique required (not a routine spinal surgery). NHS Hospital had a Committee meeting and CLOSED my case. Like what the fuck. I still cannot walk and still in extreme pain. I ended up going to a private hospital in another part of the UK 6 hours from me and got the fusion surgery with 4 metal screws, finally no pain, able to walk. So the wonderful NHS health experts told someone who has devices in her ear and feet, being followed by helicopters, and hear voices that tell her to kill herself or she will hurt others or others will die, and give her cryptic messages that need to be deciphered to know the date and form of death, that she is perfectly fine, just emotional. Thank you NHS! Great job! Like women who want to hurt others and themselves due to voices in their head that is not their own are just "emotional". I am surprised they didn't ask you where are you with your menstrual cycle, your period. These women are so "emotional", attack helicopters, spying, control devices implanted in feet and ear, thought control, voices demanding death, external entities being in control, parents being in on it, nurse being in on it. And NHS says: "oh, women… so emotional"
If you do end up CTB-ing, please do a favor to your parents and document everything as they will have an absolute solid case to sue the NHS and win a huge amount of money.
Not that this would replace you, so please don't do anything based on what the voices tell you; but NHS deserve this law suit. Sometime people need to take action or things will not change. For NHS to call psychosis as "emotional". How many people a month or a year fail like this, and nobody knows it. Even if you don't believe this is psychosis, document your story as this needs to be a massive law suit
 
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zzz-

New Member
Jan 16, 2024
4
To be honest I am once more shocked about the state of the mental health system in the UK. Have you told them that you are hearing voices in your head which are not your own? It is psychosis. I had psychosis. We all know it. Holy shit what the fuck is going on in the world if you get better help for your mental health issues in a fucking suicide forum than by a team of professionals.

Yes this needs better investigation. I wonder whether you really were fully transparent or the way how you phrased it. Have you used the same wording as in this forum?
How did u get rid of u psychosis or do u still have it? I have psychosis myself for a year now, taking pills for it but it dont help. But i agree with u post its 100% psychosis, it matches my symptoms very good
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
Here is a service to sue the NHS for misdiagnosis. Misdiagnosis happens all the time. What the NHS says is not written in stone, there are thousands misdiagnosed every year. There are even servicies specialising suing the NHS for misdiagnosis.
Here is one of those services: https://the-medical-negligence-experts.co.uk/requirements-sue-nhs-misdiagnosis/

I would give them a call and tell them EVERYtHING. Absolutely everything.

They can contract independent medical evaluators to see if you have a case or not.

Doctors who do not work for the NHS and able to diagnose mental health issues.

Please do not downplay the details, as some derails that might appear small to you, might be significant from a legal/ medical perspective.

Call the number, tell them everything, everything, I cannot emphasize enough, everything, do not downplay or omit any details. Do not be polite about it, downplaying it, making excuses. Tell them as it is, without excuses, without downplaying, without hesitation, without omitting details, without rationalizing, without having a small fragile female voice that is just too "emotional". Tell them about the devices, the voices, the helicopters, the mind control, the body implants, the voices demanding death, your death or others, mind control, urge to physically hurt others if voices are not complied with, cryptic messages, being watched, increased presence of helicopters, the urge to operate on your own feet to remove external device, the thought that parents and nurse are part of the same entity that send the voices and mind control, the message that your family will die if you don't kill yourself.
Just spell it all out.
All of it.
And ask them if they think you have a case for a law suit.
They specialise in NHS misdiagnosis, they have the medical experts they can call upon to provide second opinion.
At least you get another opinion.
Just please don't omit or downplay.
With a strong voice, with firmness, all the facts, no apologies, no rationalising, give them all the facts, from small to big
How did u get rid of u psychosis or do u still have it? I have psychosis myself for a year now, taking pills for it but it dont help. But i agree with u post its 100% psychosis, it matches my symptoms very good
I know a doctor that uses therapeutic ketosis to treat psychosis and he was able to get patients symptoms free, including schizophrenia, bipolar and clinical depression. He wrote a book about it called "Brain Energy". He is a Harvard trained psychiatrist that he himself dealt with clinical depression. Back in the 1930s I think, therapeutic ketosis was often used to treat epilepsy so he started his research trying to figure out what was about ketosis that stopped epilepsy. In his book, he describes a condition when certain people's brain cannot use glucose as a proper energy source at a cellular michchondria level, so the brain ends up in a constant state of energy deficit with neurons misfiring and all kinds of havoc. With putting the patient into therapeutic ketosis, the same that was used for epilepsy, before epilepsy medications even existed, the brain receives a different type of energy, instead of glucose, it starts using ketone bodies. And if this sick brain had an energy metabolical issue with glucose, then the ketone bodies can start creating a more stable brain metabolism, less misfiring and all of that. He had success with severe schizophrenics and severe bipolar with delusions, and also clinical depression. And I mean full reversal. However, the level of ketosis that is required for it to work is quite deep, meaning that this is a largely meat based diet, with very little vegetsbles. As the body (the liver more specifically),only start to create ketone bodies when there is no carbohydrate intake. Obviously it would need to be done under medical supervision. If you are interested, read the book (it has an Audible version) or watch his conferences on Youtube. Some people willing to eat almost only meat to reverse psychosis, bipolar and schizophrenia but some people get so much comfort from food that they are not able to make that change. Also, it is a dietary change that is 24x7, and cannot be interrupted, no cheat days. If cheating is introduced, the symptoms return almost immediately. So it is a very strict protocol. Essentially eating the same way as some Eskimo trines and some traditional African tribes eat. Humans ate only meat (according to Tel Aviv University scientific research team) for 2 million years so the human body is equipped with the ability to thrive only on meat and a small amount of vegetables. Essentially Dr Chris Palmer believes that certain mental illnesses are due to a metabolically sick brain and as a result, metabolic intervention can reverse the disease (also, Alzheimer is often called Type 3 diabetes for similar, but not exactly the same reasons). All I can say, read the book. Also, there is a youtube channel that discusses the same approach by doctors, the channel is called "Metabolic Mind"
 
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zombiegirl

zombiegirl

the living dead
Aug 17, 2023
131
are you a woman? the medical industry often dismisses our issues
 
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thealteredmind

thealteredmind

Experienced
Apr 2, 2024
231
go again to that "team of professionals", bring a BIG knife and stab one of them while shouting "IM GONNA LIBERATE ALL OF YOU, GOD HAS GIVEN ME A TASK"

(joking, not joking)
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
are you a woman? the medical industry often dismisses our issues
OP is a woman, yes.
I agree.
Heart attacks are often not diagnosed in women as the diagnostic criteria was made on men's heart attacks. And men and women heart attacks have different symptoms so often women heart attacks are not recognized.
Same for autism. Autism diagnostics criteria was created based on young boys.
However little girls don't have the same diagnostic appearance as little boys and as a result, autism is still under-diagnosed and not recognized in little girls. Some women get diagnosed in their 40s after their children are diagnosed.
Also, how many times women report a genuine medical issue and they called "histerical".
Doctors calling OP "emotional" is ridiculous and sexist. How "emotional" you have to be to hear voices that demand death, having implants in your body to mind control you and being followed by helicopters. Is this what they call "emotional"?
go again to that "team of professionals", bring a BIG knife and stab one of them while shouting "IM GONNA LIBERATE ALL OF YOU, GOD HAS GIVEN ME A TASK"

(joking, not joking)
Ha ha ha ha so true… so sad… so true.. so funny… I can't decide 😂
 
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noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,966
How did u get rid of u psychosis or do u still have it? I have psychosis myself for a year now, taking pills for it but it dont help. But i agree with u post its 100% psychosis, it matches my symptoms very good
I went to a clinic and they gave me the right medication. Sleeping helped too.

However, the first doctor I met misdiagnosed my psychosis and I told me it would only be depression.
 
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Tesha

Tesha

Life too shall pass
May 31, 2020
900
Hi @timetodie24 I've just read through the thread. How are you really feeling about the outcome of the assessment? From what you've written, it doesn't sound like you feel they got it right, but you're not 100% certain. Teams do get it wrong sometimes.

Just because they may not have immediately put you under the EIP team, it doesn't mean they believe you are a targeted individual. So please don't think that their lack of action, so far, means you still have to hurt yourself or others.

Obviously suicide will always be an option for you. I personally don't believe it should involve others though, and I don't believe hurting some people to protect more makes any sense in your situation.

There are a number of approaches you can take now - you can remain on your original path, but I know you've said you don't want to die this way or hurt others. You can speak again with your treatment team - there is nothing wrong with telling them you believe they got it wrong, or you need more help; they are not infallible and mistakes get made and corrected all the time. You can raise a request through PALS for assistance in getting your case reheard. PALS is basically the complaint team and you'll be able to ask your team or look their contact details up on line.

If you want to message me, I am willing to help you speak with your team, draft a message or find you contact numbers. Note, I am not willing to help you hurt yourself or others, but get that second opinion which should hopefully be enough to conclude if you need any additional assistance. You may or may not - that's what the complaint and liaison process is for, so please use it.
 
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timetodie24

Elementalist
Apr 14, 2023
830
Hi @timetodie24 I've just read through the thread. How are you really feeling about the outcome of the assessment? From what you've written, it doesn't sound like you feel they got it right, but you're not 100% certain. Teams do get it wrong sometimes.

Just because they may not have immediately put you under the EIP team, it doesn't mean they believe you are a targeted individual. So please don't think that their lack of action, so far, means you still have to hurt yourself or others.

Obviously suicide will always be an option for you. I personally don't believe it should involve others though, and I don't believe hurting some people to protect more makes any sense in your situation.

There are a number of approaches you can take now - you can remain on your original path, but I know you've said you don't want to die this way or hurt others. You can speak again with your treatment team - there is nothing wrong with telling them you believe they got it wrong, or you need more help; they are not infallible and mistakes get made and corrected all the time. You can raise a request through PALS for assistance in getting your case reheard. PALS is basically the complaint team and you'll be able to ask your team or look their contact details up on line.

If you want to message me, I am willing to help you speak with your team, draft a message or find you contact numbers. Note, I am not willing to help you hurt yourself or others, but get that second opinion which should hopefully be enough to conclude if you need any additional assistance. You may or may not - that's what the complaint and liaison process is for, so please use it.
Thank you for your kind offer, I really appreciate it . It's ok though, I agree with their decision and I'm glad it's not psychosis . I just feel dismissed that they pin everything on inability to handle my emotions. Eventhough I've never been diagnosed with EUPD/BPD, I think that's what they keep implying. It was a working diagnosis years ago but multiple psychiatrists agreed I don't have it. Yet somehow it always reappears on my records or as 'PD traits' so I think it always comes back to the stigma with that - young female, self harms so she's just emotional, wants attention etc. Could be my autism diagnosis too as they like to pin lots on that as well.
Even if I disagree with people here , I think targeted individual, others here think psychosis but can all agree it's more than just emotional issues either way.

But anyway I'm done with services . I was already discharged then further referrals rejected from the general community MH team too. I don't want to put myself through any more assessments and referrals. I don't have the energy, time or motivation to complain. I don't have any basis to either , EIP's team job was to rule out (or in) psychosis and they did. Not their place to suggest what else it may be.
If the primary care MHP gets back in touch in time I'll chat to her about what she thinks. But I think this is just something out of the realm of mental health services and that's ok, at least I know now. My remaining time and energy needs to focus on deciphering codes and planning ticket out of here .

Thank you for all your patience and understanding with me
 
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