Help cbt place

[ecmnesia]

i don't want to do it at home. at first I was going to book a hotel room, but because of covid the prices are just absurd and several places are not offering service. i haven't consider that this might happen before and know I don't know what to do, since I will likely have an opportunity to catch the bus this weekend.

would I raise any flags if I went to a motel (seems like in the US its not a place for casual sex, but that's the case where I live) by myself? i don't drive, so Id have to pay an Uber. plus i never went to a place like this, so I am low key freaking out. that was completely unexpected on my plan.

 

[Umbrellaterm]

You can always do it in a tent deep in the woods. Maybe set up a cozy campfire.

Why is motel scary?

 

[Lordsudbury]

Motels not too scary you're just overthinking it. Try it out it's actually kind of nice to go to a new place and just relax and have a different mentally unattached room to think in

 

[ecmnesia]

You can always do it in a tent deep in the woods. Maybe set up a cozy campfire.

Why is motel scary?

i live in a big city and there are no woods near by unfortunately.

i guess I am just afraid that they might find it weird for someone to go their alone. and that would someone raise flags.

maybe I should just do like @Lordsudbury suggested. i could go there the night before to see what is like, idk.

 

[ronigail9]

More single people go to hotels than anything. Business and students.

 

[Lupgevif]

ecmnesia is Brazilian. By motels I think they refer to roadside ones. These are notorious to be used for sex, but drivers who travel a lot often stop there alone to sleep. It could be very weird if you got there without a car of your own, I do think it could raise some flags.

 

[ecmnesia]

ecmnesia is Brazilian. By motels I think they refer to roadside ones. These are notorious to be used for sex, but drivers who travel a lot often stop there alone to sleep. It could be very weird if you got there without a car of your own, I do think it could raise some flags.

exactly, that's what I am afraid of. i know of nowhere else to go. if I did it on the streets someone may find me. i can't book a hotel and didn't want my family to find my corpse.

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

Places like that look the other way. Whether it's one person or ten that show up.

 

[Lupgevif]

By "raise some flags" I mean people might be wary of your presence, but not exactly take immediate action. A lot could go through the employees' heads, but the expected is that they just treat your normally, as long as you are not acting suspiciously yourself.

 

[ecmnesia]

i hope I can act normal. cause it seems like the only option.

 

[Lordsudbury]

Yeah, take my advice. There's nothing wrong even with checking into those sketchy hooker hotels and such. I lived in 10 different countries so I know all about a variety of hotel cultures.

Once you do it once you won't feel so weird or scared. I'm so used to it now I have regular hotels I go to if I'm tired of my roommates or want to kinda "feel" like I'm on holiday, or just to write and listen to calm music on my own in a room I am not responsible for.

You might enjoy it

 

[LostSoul101]

I've checked into hotels on my own for one night to investigate how easy it is to be a lone local checking in and I went unnoticed. If you can afford to do it as a test, I would suggest doing it. And even if you raise suspicion, it's a test and you wont be carrying anything to ctb with you. If they do ask say home is noisy right now and you need a quiet night.

 

[ecmnesia]

once again here I am asking you guys for help. i didn't want to make a new thread since the topic is pretty much the same.

i mentally prepared to cbt this weekend because my family would most likely travel and I'd be able to cbt in peace. they are considering not going anymore, but honestly i am feeling more ready to catch the bus then ever, so I want to go on with my plan. to do so in this condition tho, I'd have to leave home quietly without anyone noticing.

i plan to get my money from the bank so that no one could possibly trace me (yes my parents control my bank account) and then go to a hotel. thing is, I'd have to use my ID there. would my parents be able to find me somehow? although I am of age they are too controlling and that's why I am worried.

for the police to be involved i believe, the person has to be missing for at least 24 hours, therefore I believe they won't be able to use their help. but i just want to be sure.

does this sound too crazy? thanks

 

[LostSoul101]

I doubt they'd find you. Use cash so your bank transactions cannot be tracked down to the hotel. Usually when hotels check people in and you have to show ID, usually you fill out a piece of paper and show them ID and they don't keep the ID. They just give it back to you. Oh actually......I don't use ID when I go to hotels...... Hence people are able to check in under false names. That's an idea! When you get to the hotel, if they ask you to fill out a form, ask if they want to see ID (don't act nervous. Ask casually, like you're asking if you need to get it out of your bag, if you know what I mean. Don't have it already in your hand.). If they say they don't need to see anything but want you to fill out a form, put a fake name. And pay with cash so that they don't notice a different name on the paying card AND so that the transaction doesn't show up on your bank statement. Does that make sense?

 

[ecmnesia]

I doubt they'd find you. Use cash so your bank transactions cannot be tracked down to the hotel. Usually when hotels check people in and you have to show ID, usually you fill out a piece of paper and show them ID and they don't keep the ID. They just give it back to you. Oh actually......I don't use ID when I go to hotels...... Hence people are able to check in under false names. That's an idea! When you get to the hotel, if they ask you to fill out a form, ask if they want to see ID (don't act nervous. Ask casually, like you're asking if you need to get it out of your bag, if you know what I mean. Don't have it already in your hand.). If they say they don't need to see anything but want you to fill out a form, put a fake name. And pay with cash so that they don't notice a different name on the paying card AND so that the transaction doesn't show up on your bank statement. Does that make sense?

yes! a lot, thank you so much. it really helped.

 

[LostSoul101]

If the hotel does request ID and you see them log that into a computer system, the police cannot trace it until after the missing person time, as you said.
If a lone local goes to a hotel and acts nervous, it might raise suspicion. But be calm! It's like buying a rope at a hardware store - people get nervous about it but it's actually innocent but because you know the purpose of what you're doing, you assume others will suspect and be suspicious.

 

[ecmnesia]

If the hotel does request ID and you see them log that into a computer system, the police cannot trace it until after the missing person time, as you said.

things are finally working out for me regarding cbt. is good to know that I can go without worrying.

 

[LostSoul101]

I'm sorry you're going :(

 

[ecmnesia]

I'm sorry you're going :(

don't be, i am not sad to go, these last days have been easier than the last thousand ones. i feel in peace now that I've made my decision. and ironically enough, knowing that i am close to end the chains that used to hold me finally left my ankles. I feel anxious, and scared, but for the first time I am dealing with all obstacles that unexpectedly rise, i think it means that i am ready, and i am happy for myself, that i am finally able to get control over myself.

 

[LostSoul101]

Actually a lone local might also go to a hotel for a sex date! Or because their spouse is being a nightmare. Hotel staff cannot assume every local checking in is going to CTB.

don't be, i am not sad to go, these last days have been easier than the last thousand ones. i feel in peace now that I've made my decision. and ironically enough, knowing that i am close to end the chains that used to hold me finally left my ankles. I feel anxious, and scared, but for the first time I am dealing with all obstacles that unexpectedly rise, i think it means that i am ready, and i am happy for myself, that i am finally able to get control over myself.

I'm unsure if it's allowed to say: but I admire someone who has made peace with it. I am still undecided, probably because my method and paperwork are all sorted out and it's so easy I could do it any moment that now I'm hesitating. People who make the decision are so strong and brave.

 

[ecmnesia]

Actually a lone local might also go to a hotel for a sex date! Or because their spouse is being a nightmare. Hotel staff cannot assume every local checking in is going to CTB

i don't have much money, but i figured I should use the small amount i have to die in a nice beautiful place. if I can I'll try to get a great view of the city, i think I'd like to die seeing the lights fade.

 

[LostSoul101]

Awww that's sweet

 

[Time to fly]

don't be, i am not sad to go, these last days have been easier than the last thousand ones. i feel in peace now that I've made my decision. and ironically enough, knowing that i am close to end the chains that used to hold me finally left my ankles. I feel anxious, and scared, but for the first time I am dealing with all obstacles that unexpectedly rise, i think it means that i am ready, and i am happy for myself, that i am finally able to get control over myself.

I hope you find the peace and happiness you want...remember you don't have to do it and backing out is not a failure, you could just look at it as treating yourself to a night in a hotel for a mini break for yourself...

 

[ecmnesia]

I'm unsure if it's allowed to say: but I admire someone who has made peace with it. I am still undecided, probably because my method and paperwork are all sorted out and it's so easy I could do it any moment that now I'm hesitating. People who make the decision are so strong and brave.

not a long time ago, i thought I was never going to be able to reach this decision. i had everything ready, as you do now, but something still hold me back. i don't know how it happened, that i came to this, but eventually things got sorted out naturally. don't rush things, take your time, get away from here a bit if you feel like that's good for you (i did this and it helped me to see that i really did want to cbt), do things you still enjoy, calm down and relax. when your time come, i think you will know. one day you will wake up and find out that you are a little be more ready. you will have doubts, but Idk, i have this gut feeling, this itch and adrenaline, it tells me that I can finally leave.

I hope you find the peace and happiness you want...remember you don't have to do it and backing out is not a failure, you could just look at it as treating yourself to a night in a hotel for a mini break for yourself...

thanks. I'm trying to do as you said, trying not to make a burden out of this or an obligation.

it might sound silly. but it's almost as if something was calling me.

 

[Time to fly]

not a long time ago, i thought I was never going to be able to reach this decision. i had everything ready, as you do now, but something still hold me back. i don't know how it happened, that i came to this, but eventually things got sorted out naturally. don't rush things, take your time, get away from here a bit if you feel like that's good for you (i did this and it helped me to see that i really did want to cbt), do things you still enjoy, calm down and relax. when your time come, i think you will know. one day you will wake up and find out that you are a little be more ready. you will have doubts, but Idk, i have this gut feeling, this itch and adrenaline, it tells me that I can finally leave.

thanks. I'm trying to do as you said, trying not to make a burden out of this or an obligation.

it might sound silly. but it's almost as if something was calling me.

Seems to me as if you have found the peace you need...you will be missed I do enjoy your posts