Venting Cant leave my house anymore.

[obei]

Maybe im just lazy, but I havent been socializing for quite a while, havent been anywhere aside from my grandparents house to work 2h at most, and my house. I just ordered food that I can get 2 mins from my house and when it comes Imma just purge it cause im so scared of it and I gained a few kg when this started, prob cause I dont move as much. If I get to 60 kg imma ctb for sure, cause I have eating disorder and it makes me feel so so bad when I gain weight.
Also as I said in my previous post I started having issues sleeping as well, have started drinking again and smoking more than a pack a day, more than I ever had, I dont get out of my pjs, barely shower once every few days.
Like, how the fuck do I fix this? Am I just a shitty person and am just lazy af?
I cant do this, I fucking cant.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

responded to your other post before seeing this one. you definitely should be more active than that if you don't want more health issues. once your muscles atrophy it's a major pain to get them built back up. i don't know how to motivate you. i hope you find something that interests you.

 

[obei]

responded to your other post before seeing this one. you definitely should be more active than that if you don't want more health issues. once your muscles atrophy it's a major pain to get them built back up. i don't know how to motivate you. i hope you find something that interests you.

I dont have any motivation to do it.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

maybe 'not feeling worse than you already do' can be motivation? you don't need to join a gym or do too much. i just don't want you to be in my state because it sounds like that's where you're heading. drinking/smoking/not eating - that's me as well. i have a hard time just making an instant meal. my bathroom is about 20 feet away. i find it a chore to get up for even that. hope you didn't throw out the food at least. not eating will only compound the problem.

 

[HighFlight]

I've had a hard time finding motivation to stay active, even though I know its needed due to my heart issues. For me, i had to force myself, but started real slowly. First, just moving around the house. Then, simply walking around the neighborhood. I now do 3-4 mile hikes around the local parks several times a week.

maybe 'not feeling worse than you already do' can be motivation? you don't need to join a gym or do too much.

This is what helped me initially. Maybe it can help you too.

 

[AresCohere]

I feel very similar. I'm in uni and i rarely ever leave my dorm other than for food and classes, and even doing the bare minimum feels like a chore.

And I was told this would be the best time of my life.

 

[HighFlight]

And I was told this would be the best time of my life.

For me, it was... But that was a different time. College will be what you make of it, and those who have other issues are at a disadvantage. However, you should be able to get help from the school to overcome some of the obstacles. But you'll need to take the initiative to talk to people and let them know what you need.

 

[AresCohere]

For me, it was... But that was a different time. College will be what you make of it, and those who have other issues are at a disadvantage. However, you should be able to get help from the school to overcome some of the obstacles. But you'll need to take the initiative to talk to people and let them know what you need.

I will avoid, at all costs, anyone here finding out about my "issues"

 

[HighFlight]

I will avoid, at all costs, anyone here finding out about my "issues"

I'm sorry about that. I obviously don't know know your issues, but can understand not wanting anyone to find out. I've spent 30 year pretending to be normal and hiding my issues. But now that's no longer possible, and I'm here trying to figure out my options.

If you need someone to talk to, I'm sure you can find someone here that you can relate to. And you are welcome to PM me if you just want someone to talk to.

Regardless, I hope that you can find some peace.