Help can't hang myself at home, what are my other options?

[fangface]

i plan to hang myself, but i don't have it in me to ctb at my home. i live with my mother and my younger sister, both of whom i love dearly, and i coudn't die peacefully knowing they'd be the ones to discover my body. if i'm going to die, i don't want to leave them with any more pain than what's inevitable. but i'm struggling to find somewhere away from home that's secluded yet accessible enough for me. i live in a fairly quiet area that has plenty of trees and small parks dotted around, but they're still very public areas, and i don't want to risk getting found mid-attempt. for what it's worth, i was originally planning to go with partial, but i've looked into full suspension also.

if i can't find a quiet enough place outside, i do have a few spots around the house i can use. i'm home alone a fair amount during the week and i'd definitely have enough time to go through with it without getting caught. all that's stopped me in the past is SI and the guilt of knowing that my lifeless body would be the last that my family sees of me. they don't deserve that, no matter how suicidal i am.

i'm planning on going out tomorrow to scout for/find a more suitable place away from home for me to ctb. is it worth it? or does it make more sense for me to do it at home, and leave a note out where i know someone would hopefully see it before they see my body?

 

[FuneralCry]

I feel like only you can decide what is the best option, but I think that for me personally I would only attempt somewhere outside if there is no risk of being found too early. The fear of failure is what holds me back from attempting and it sounds so horrifying ending up with damage. I'm sorry that it has come to this point for you and I wish you relief from suffering in whatever you decide to do.

 

[befree]

I can only think of two options: forest or use a tourniquet instead for the carotid method. I think it´s easier to find a place for the carotid method, than for hanging.

Selbstbestimmt Sterben Die Carotis - Methode.pdf - AnonFiles

anonfiles.com

It´s in German, but you can use deepl.com or another online translater.

 

[clown]

My method is also hanging, and i have problems doing it at home. So I have been considering doing it in a forrest and carrying my phone with me so police can track it and find my body after im dead.