Act Two
Happy thoughts in shards, all over the floor.
- Jan 29, 2024
- 35
I'm trying to get help. I feel trapped, like CTB is my only way out. I've made plans w/ a date that's about 1 month out, to give myself time to think it over and find a different solution.
So far, nobody knows how depressed and suicidal I am, so I guess I do a pretty good job of pretending. I don't feel comfortable telling my friends or parents about everything going on, since they think I'm doing just fine. I think I might reach out to an old friend who lives very far away via text messages, but I'm afraid she might report my phone number somehow (I'm very paranoid about people finding out how I really feel).
Is this something I should be worried about? I feel like that's the only way to talk to someone about this and get advice, but I'm scared that it'll all fall apart if they trace it back to me.
So far, nobody knows how depressed and suicidal I am, so I guess I do a pretty good job of pretending. I don't feel comfortable telling my friends or parents about everything going on, since they think I'm doing just fine. I think I might reach out to an old friend who lives very far away via text messages, but I'm afraid she might report my phone number somehow (I'm very paranoid about people finding out how I really feel).
Is this something I should be worried about? I feel like that's the only way to talk to someone about this and get advice, but I'm scared that it'll all fall apart if they trace it back to me.