clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
Hi.
I'm new here. I'll start with a brief history for you to get a better idea. I've been physically ill since I was a teenager, but it's gotten a lot worse as I've gotten older and into my 20s. At this point, it's affected every aspect of my life. I'm unable to work, socialise, yadayadayada.

for those with experience of having physical problems, how do you cope & carry on when nothing makes the condition any better?

I've tried a lot of things, research, various chemicals/medicines/hormones, you name it and nothing has ever even touched it, really. I had bad experiences with doctors when I was younger, until I eventually resigned and gave up searching with them. After years of continuous progression and degeneration I've tried going for another round of trying with the doctors and I'm currently in the progress of it, but I don't know if it'll be any more fruitful this time around.

I've been enduring it for so long. I try to hold on to the hope that I could get better someday, find a cure, or thinking how other people have it worse than me but like without being able to work, I feel like short of winning the lottery, I'm just effed, and CTB is my only realistic option. I can't afford the healthcare I need, or the expensive diagnostic tests I could if I could go private. Other people do have it worse and I do truly believe the possibility of getting better is out there, but without any of it becoming a reality, and my youth being wasted, it does little to offer any real solace.
 
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SinisterKid

SinisterKid

Visionary
Jun 1, 2019
2,113
I am currently looking into microdosing as I have only really heard good things thus far. But its early days as far as research goes and I dont want to risk making things worse [if thats possible] by jumping in feet first. But nothing else has worked, so anything is worth considering after 11 years of this nightmare.
 
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clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
Microdosing LSD you mean?
 
SinisterKid

SinisterKid

Visionary
Jun 1, 2019
2,113
Yes or shrooms as people seem to call them these days.
 
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Darkhaven

Darkhaven

All i have left is memories
May 19, 2019
979
I don't know what kind of ailment you suffer from.
I have a neurological disease, it's chronic and progressive.
I started noticing it at 21 and was quickly diagnosed.
It's been more than a year now and i can't see and experience life the way i did before all of this.
I simply can't cope and that's why i'm here.
I want to finish it once and for all.
I take a lot of satisfaction in knowing that wherever problem or disease is affecting me, it will doe with me.
I'm waiting on my things to get things going.
I'm sorry for not sounding more positive.
I'm positive that you have a stronger will than me and can accept your health problems better than i do. Don't give up.
 
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clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
Yes or shrooms as people seem to call them these days.
I've heard some pretty good things about microdosing too, and something I've thought about but unsure how to source with being certain I'm getting what I'm actually paying for. Supposed to be helpful for the dopaminergic and serotoninergic systems & so depression. I think LSD is a synthetic version of shrooms. i understand the feeling of being at your wits end and trying anything you can, but be careful still.


I don't know what kind of ailment you suffer from.
I have a neurological disease, it's chronic and progressive.
I started noticing it at 21 and was quickly diagnosed.
It's been more than a year now and i can't see and experience life the way i did before all of this.
I simply can't cope and that's why i'm here.
I want to finish it once and for all.
I take a lot of satisfaction in knowing that wherever problem or disease is affecting me, it will doe with me.
I'm waiting on my things to get things going.
I'm sorry for not sounding more positive.
I'm positive that you have a stronger will than me and can accept your health problems better than i do. Don't give up.

I'm sorry to hear of your diagnosis. It's okay, I struggle to stay/be positive myself. It's hard to when you have a chronic problem there at all times. I feel like I can't cope either pretty much all of the time. I don't have a name yet but I'm pretty certain there's either a neurological basis, or aspect at least, to my condition.

I have read of cases of people with even the severest progressive diseases like ALS having spontaneous recovery and recovering motor function. It's rare but it does happen. I know it offers little help until it happens to you, but I just figured I'd share it with you anyway.
 
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SinisterKid

SinisterKid

Visionary
Jun 1, 2019
2,113
I do my research and advise everyone to do the same. If it helps me day to day, I am happy to go with it. If not, I can still be recreational if I choose, so it could be a win win situation.
 
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M

mediocre

trapped here
Nov 9, 2019
1,442
Have you been diagnosed? I'm in a similar situation and I've done tons of research and been to doctors but I still don't have any diagnosis. I have burning pain in my head, abdomen, legs and constantly feel sick. It's 24/7 and has gotten worse recently. I can't even stand up for long never mind do anything productive. I'm just gradually getting sicker and the pain is getting worse. The healthcare system is useless. Unless you present physical symptoms they do fuck all. I'm considering go private as well.
 
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FTL.Wanderer

FTL.Wanderer

Enlightened
May 31, 2018
1,782
I deal with progressively worsening chronic pain (from auto accident, back). It ripped my life apart, like you said. And if you're not in a body cast or wheelchair so others can SEE something's wrong, they heap disgust on you for not acting the way they expect you to... I tried doctors, alternative medicine, nutrition, supplements, therapy (including physical)... Nothing helps. Worse, as I think you were alluding to, if you don't get better, the medical establishment labels YOU a problem and friends/family abandon you for being a drag. No winning, unless you (a) get better, or (b) fake being happy anyway despite the agony. :/

No wonder chronic pain is associated with suicide. Best of luck to you. If it helps to talk with someone else in a similar boat, PM me anytime. Peace.
 
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clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
Have you been diagnosed? I'm in a similar situation and I've done tons of research and been to doctors but I still don't have any diagnosis. I have burning pain in my head, abdomen, legs and constantly feel sick. It's 24/7 and has gotten worse recently. I can't even stand up for long never mind do anything productive. I'm just gradually getting sicker and the pain is getting worse. The healthcare system is useless. Unless you present physical symptoms they do fuck all. I'm considering go private as well.

no diagnosis yet. Just a malabsorption of nutrients confirmed, but dk why still, IBD testing like crohns or colitis was negative. I have an mri on Saturday so we'll see if that shows anything. The healthcare system really is useless. I can't stand for long periods either. Do you feel faint when you do? Does it happen on standing up from sitting/lying or after you've been standing a while? If the former, have you looked into POTS? That just springs to mind first. I wish I could afford to go private so badly.
I deal with progressively worsening chronic pain (from auto accident, back). It ripped my life apart, like you said. And if you're not in a body cast or wheelchair so others can SEE something's wrong, they heap disgust on you for not acting the way they expect you to... I tried doctors, alternative medicine, nutrition, supplements, therapy (including physical)... Nothing helps. Worse, as I think you were alluding to, if you don't get better, the medical establishment labels YOU a problem and friends/family abandon you for being a drag. No winning, unless you (a) get better, or (b) fake being happy anyway despite the agony. :/

No wonder chronic pain is associated with suicide. Best of luck to you. If it helps to talk with someone else in a similar boat, PM me anytime. Peace.

wow you really articulated a lot of my problems better than I could myself lol. That's exactly what I mean. Honestly the experiences I've had with some doctors has been downright despicable. I hope you can find some relief and the same goes if you (or anyone) ever needs to talk
 
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M

mediocre

trapped here
Nov 9, 2019
1,442
no diagnosis yet. Just a malabsorption of nutrients confirmed, but dk why still, IBD testing like crohns or colitis was negative. I have an mri on Saturday so we'll see if that shows anything. The healthcare system really is useless. I can't stand for long periods either. Do you feel faint when you do? Does it happen on standing up from sitting/lying or after you've been standing a while? If the former, have you looked into POTS? That just springs to mind first. I wish I could afford to go private so badly.
Yes, feel faint, groggy 24/7 it happens both on standing up from sitting/lying or standing for long periods. I've read about POTS and many others. Unfortunately it's impossible to self-diagnose yourself. I hope your MRI goes well and you get answers. Im getting a gastroscopy but don't have much faith in anything been found even though I am in pain. Are you in the UK?
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
no diagnosis yet. Just a malabsorption of nutrients confirmed, but dk why still, IBD testing like crohns or colitis was negative. I have an mri on Saturday so we'll see if that shows anything. The healthcare system really is useless. I can't stand for long periods either. Do you feel faint when you do? Does it happen on standing up from sitting/lying or after you've been standing a while? If the former, have you looked into POTS? That just springs to mind first. I wish I could afford to go private so badly.
I'm in a similar situation and tbh I don't cope. It's winning.
I can't digest food properly. My bowel is partially blocked and I hardly eat. I have to pee all the time so I'm up all night and very little sleep. I can hardly walk from pain and malnutrition; I'm housebound but everyone still expects me to get out.

And I'm alone except for family I don't trust who I hardly see anyway.

I cope by posting on here and recently by playing online on my pc.
It ticks the addiction box but it depending on my pain levels and how anxious I feel.

I too have given up on doctors after a four year battle and right back to the beginning. You'll get more help on here. Got a scan coming up myself don't even know how I'll get to it.

I hope you get lucky and get a good doc and they can help you. Keep us updated. People on here can offer you support ad ideas and you can always vent and moan if you like.
 
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M

mediocre

trapped here
Nov 9, 2019
1,442
I'm in a similar situation and tbh I don't cope. It's winning.
I can't digest food properly. My bowel is partially blocked and I hardly eat. I have to pee all the time so I'm up all night and very little sleep. I can hardly walk from pain and malnutrition; I'm housebound but everyone still expects me to get out.

And I'm alone except for family I don't trust who I hardly see anyway.

I cope by posting on here and recently by playing online on my pc.
It ticks the addiction box but it depending on my pain levels and how anxious I feel.

I too have given up on doctors after a four year battle and right back to the beginning. You'll get more help on here. Got a scan coming up myself don't even know how I'll get to it.

I hope you get lucky and get a good doc and they can help you. Keep us updated. People on here can offer you support ad ideas and you can always vent and moan if you like.
I've also had problems digesting food recently which is why I'm getting a gastroscopy. Have you had one? Or a cystoscopy for your bowel?
 
D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I've had a gastrostopy which found gastritis from h.pylori. no symptoms though, didn't even realise I had it!
I've also had a virtual colonoscopy and an endoscopy.
They wanted to do a cystoscopy (where the endoscope goes somewhere you really don't want to go. No not up there, I mean REALLY don't want it to go), but I couldn't go through with it.
 
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clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
Yes, feel faint, groggy 24/7 it happens both on standing up from sitting/lying or standing for long periods. I've read about POTS and many others. Unfortunately it's impossible to self-diagnose yourself. I hope your MRI goes well and you get answers. Im getting a gastroscopy but don't have much faith in anything been found even though I am in pain. Are you in the UK?

ya the UK. I know what you mean with the little faith, but if you don't find anything, at least you're still ruling out some stuff

I'm in a similar situation and tbh I don't cope. It's winning.
I can't digest food properly. My bowel is partially blocked and I hardly eat. I have to pee all the time so I'm up all night and very little sleep. I can hardly walk from pain and malnutrition; I'm housebound but everyone still expects me to get out.

And I'm alone except for family I don't trust who I hardly see anyway.

I cope by posting on here and recently by playing online on my pc.
It ticks the addiction box but it depending on my pain levels and how anxious I feel.

I too have given up on doctors after a four year battle and right back to the beginning. You'll get more help on here. Got a scan coming up myself don't even know how I'll get to it.

I hope you get lucky and get a good doc and they can help you. Keep us updated. People on here can offer you support ad ideas and you can always vent and moan if you like.

damn we're in a similar situation. I definitely feel like this illness is winning too. I don't have the excessive urination you have but I suffer really badly with insomnia so I run on very little sleep aswell. I did seem to luck out a bit with the recent GP but I think that's just coz I wasn't taking no shit lol. It took me a long time to work up to take on this fight with them again

I do appreciate that though (: I'll keep yall updated for sure
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
ya the UK. I know what you mean with the little faith, but if you don't find anything, at least you're still ruling out some stuff



damn we're in a similar situation. I definitely feel like this illness is winning too. I don't have the excessive urination you have but I suffer really badly with insomnia so I run on very little sleep aswell. I did seem to luck out a bit with the recent GP but I think that's just coz I wasn't taking no shit lol. It took me a long time to work up to take on this fight with them again

I do appreciate that though (: I'll keep yall updated for sure
And welcome to ss. Sorry you're here. :notsure:
 
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M

mediocre

trapped here
Nov 9, 2019
1,442
I've had a gastrostopy which found gastritis from h.pylori. no symptoms though, didn't even realise I had it!
I've also had a virtual colonoscopy and an endoscopy.
They wanted to do a cystoscopy (where the endoscope goes somewhere you really don't want to go. No not up there, I mean REALLY don't want it to go), but I couldn't go through with it.
I'm sorry you had to go through all this it sounds horrible! Sorry if I'm prying too much and asking too many questions but if you had no symptoms for h.pylori how did you end up getting the gastroscopy? Was it because of the problems digesting food?
 
D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I'm sorry you had to go through all this it sounds horrible! Sorry if I'm prying too much and asking too many questions but if you had no symptoms for h.pylori how did you end up getting the gastroscopy? Was it because of the problems digesting food?
For constipation. It's ironic. It wasn't really necessary as I had no gastric symptoms they were just going through the motions. But it was the only test that found anything, and that itself was asymptomatic.
 
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M

mediocre

trapped here
Nov 9, 2019
1,442
That is ironic. But at least you got a diagnosis. Are you regularly receiving treatment for the gastritis and bowel obstruction? is it permanent?

I wish I had doctors that would go through the motions and suggest tests for me to do. Unfortunately I constantly have to go to my GP and beg for each test that I want done and he isn't very helpful at suggestions. It's like talking to robots.
 
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Chronicillness

Chronicillness

Experienced
Jun 19, 2018
236
The thing about today's illnesses, is that once you get diagnosed with a chronic disease, you are immediately afflicted with an overwhelming sense of hoplesness and a trial of grief, and then usually after this period of grief comes to an end, you adapt to your physical illness mentally and physically (usually by coming to terms with what you can/can't do anymore due to your new illness and the laws it has forcibly written for your body). We're masters of adaptation. The PROBLEM with today's illnesses, is that you can get one disease — learn to cope with said disease, and then be cursed with ANOTHER one just after you've mentally adapted to the disease(s) that caused you immense mental turmoil and hopelessness. We're never given a chance to adapt and heal — today's chronically ill folk are constantly bombarded with alien illnesses, allowing no time for relief or pleasure. How is anyone supposed to cope with that?

We were all born in the wrong generation. It really is that simple. If we were born in... lets say... year 3000, we'd likely be a gene-edited transhuman who experiences extreme (but balanced and productive) super-happiness as our default setting and no symptoms of physical or mental illness ever feltin our lifespan.

Out of the potentially hundreds of thousands+ of years humans might live for, we were unlucky enough to be born in a generation of torturous physical ailments.
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
No I've got no treatment.
The gastritis was incedentail.

I'm on excessive doses of laxative that doesn't really work. I pray each night for just the tiniest movement to lessen the pain and damage but having to take more and more for less and less effect.

I've been told it'll kill me. All the docs do is shrug and send me for the same tests I've already had. What I really need is surgery. Whatever caused it is now irrelevant. My bowel is dead.

Ho hum!
 
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BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
I do my research and advise everyone to do the same. If it helps me day to day, I am happy to go with it. If not, I can still be recreational if I choose, so it could be a win win situation.
That sounds very interesting to me, but it's probably too progressive and forward thinking for the backward United States government to allow its citizens to utilize.
Usually, any treatments or meds that actually work get banned immediately here.
So much for "land of the free". :meh:
 
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Passersby

Passersby

Trapped in space and time
Aug 29, 2019
1,640
Hi.
I'm new here. I'll start with a brief history for you to get a better idea. I've been physically ill since I was a teenager, but it's gotten a lot worse as I've gotten older and into my 20s. At this point, it's affected every aspect of my life. I'm unable to work, socialise, yadayadayada.

for those with experience of having physical problems, how do you cope & carry on when nothing makes the condition any better?

I've tried a lot of things, research, various chemicals/medicines/hormones, you name it and nothing has ever even touched it, really. I had bad experiences with doctors when I was younger, until I eventually resigned and gave up searching with them. After years of continuous progression and degeneration I've tried going for another round of trying with the doctors and I'm currently in the progress of it, but I don't know if it'll be any more fruitful this time around.

I've been enduring it for so long. I try to hold on to the hope that I could get better someday, find a cure, or thinking how other people have it worse than me but like without being able to work, I feel like short of winning the lottery, I'm just effed, and CTB is my only realistic option. I can't afford the healthcare I need, or the expensive diagnostic tests I could if I could go private. Other people do have it worse and I do truly believe the possibility of getting better is out there, but without any of it becoming a reality, and my youth being wasted, it does little to offer any real solace.

Hi Clandestine, I can totally relate to your suffering. I had a great life once and then a couple of injuries and a real bad accident ruined it. Several surgeries and suffering and yrs of pt. I improved some of my symptoms but not nearly enough to justify going on living . I also have chronic pain and disability problems. Breathing , standing, sitting, problems with it all. Neurological also. Nerve damage. I have also been through hell with the doctors and have traveled all over the country going to the best doctors trying to fix my body. My mom wants me to try one more place but I know it's usless because I have spent yrs researching this and all the best doctors have told me there is nothing left to do. There are a few doctors out there that actually care but that still doesn't mean that they can wave a magic wand and fix everything. The system also wants our money and I still set up to extract it from us all all cost and even after we die. It's a sad reality. I know what you mean as far as not being able to work , and socialize and find a place in society. I was ripped out of society from my accident. My situation is only going to get worse with aging just like anything and everything degraded as we get older. I would rather out a bullet through my head before being in a rest home and dependent on the system or whoever there was to help me. Anyway I hope you can find improvement and ideally a way out of your situation. If you ever want to talk about it fell free to pm me. Peace ✌️
 
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FTL.Wanderer

FTL.Wanderer

Enlightened
May 31, 2018
1,782
My situation is only going to get worse with aging just like anything and everything degraded as we get older. I would rather out a bullet through my head before being in a rest home and dependent on the system or whoever there was to help me.

Yes! Yes! And YES! <Hug>
 
Passersby

Passersby

Trapped in space and time
Aug 29, 2019
1,640
I deal with progressively worsening chronic pain (from auto accident, back). It ripped my life apart, like you said. And if you're not in a body cast or wheelchair so others can SEE something's wrong, they heap disgust on you for not acting the way they expect you to... I tried doctors, alternative medicine, nutrition, supplements, therapy (including physical)... Nothing helps. Worse, as I think you were alluding to, if you don't get better, the medical establishment labels YOU a problem and friends/family abandon you for being a drag. No winning, unless you (a) get better, or (b) fake being happy anyway despite the agony. :/

No wonder chronic pain is associated with suicide. Best of luck to you. If it helps to talk with someone else in a similar boat, PM me anytime. Peace.

Hi FTL Wanderer, I appreciate the hug and compassion. Sounds like we have some things in common even though they aren't the kind of things we want . I totally agree and can relate to all the things you say. I was bedridden for a year. I am not in a wheelchair. I am not bedridden now. Like you said if people don't see a wheelchair or cane or something then they think your fine. Ol just suck it up your fine! Heard this before. When people look at me you can't see what I have going on except for shaking sometimes. Also might come off as nervous or uncomfortable and that's because I am because I'm fighting my body to be wherever I am. Chronic pain and disability will always be associated with suicide like you said. It equals a meaningless life and a meager existence. Some people can deal with it better than others and every disability is different . Sedentary life is not for me especially if you were used to living a great fast paced exciting life before then making the transition is no good. Pm me as well if you ever feel like it. Hope you feel better. :hug:
 
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Sweet emotion

Sweet emotion

Enlightened
Sep 14, 2019
1,325
Hi.
I'm new here. I'll start with a brief history for you to get a better idea. I've been physically ill since I was a teenager, but it's gotten a lot worse as I've gotten older and into my 20s. At this point, it's affected every aspect of my life. I'm unable to work, socialise, yadayadayada.

for those with experience of having physical problems, how do you cope & carry on when nothing makes the condition any better?

I've tried a lot of things, research, various chemicals/medicines/hormones, you name it and nothing has ever even touched it, really. I had bad experiences with doctors when I was younger, until I eventually resigned and gave up searching with them. After years of continuous progression and degeneration I've tried going for another round of trying with the doctors and I'm currently in the progress of it, but I don't know if it'll be any more fruitful this time around.

I've been enduring it for so long. I try to hold on to the hope that I could get better someday, find a cure, or thinking how other people have it worse than me but like without being able to work, I feel like short of winning the lottery, I'm just effed, and CTB is my only realistic option. I can't afford the healthcare I need, or the expensive diagnostic tests I could if I could go private. Other people do have it worse and I do truly believe the possibility of getting better is out there, but without any of it becoming a reality, and my youth being wasted, it does little to offer any real solace.
Can I ask what you are suffering from? I have something called Complex regional pain syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I've had it since I was 20 and I'm 34 now. So I've had it for over 14 years. I have no idea how I've managed to go on. I guess I'd have to give credit to my mother. She has been there for me every step if the way. I don't know how I've dealt with this viscious pain that I have non stop and all the other little side effects it brings with it. I must be a stubborn bitch.

I'm so sorry you're sick and especially that you got sick at such a young age! You never had a chance to live. I'd like to PM you if you don't mind.
Have you been diagnosed? I'm in a similar situation and I've done tons of research and been to doctors but I still don't have any diagnosis. I have burning pain in my head, abdomen, legs and constantly feel sick. It's 24/7 and has gotten worse recently. I can't even stand up for long never mind do anything productive. I'm just gradually getting sicker and the pain is getting worse. The healthcare system is useless. Unless you present physical symptoms they do fuck all. I'm considering go private as well.
When you say burning pain...does it feel like the areas you talk about have been set on fire? Are you hypersensitive?
I've had a gastrostopy which found gastritis from h.pylori. no symptoms though, didn't even realise I had it!
I've also had a virtual colonoscopy and an endoscopy.
They wanted to do a cystoscopy (where the endoscope goes somewhere you really don't want to go. No not up there, I mean REALLY don't want it to go), but I couldn't go through with it.
Up the Willy.
I've had a gastrostopy which found gastritis from h.pylori. no symptoms though, didn't even realise I had it!
I've also had a virtual colonoscopy and an endoscopy.
They wanted to do a cystoscopy (where the endoscope goes somewhere you really don't want to go. No not up there, I mean REALLY don't want it to go), but I couldn't go through with it.
Up the Willy.
No I've got no treatment.
The gastritis was incedentail.

I'm on excessive doses of laxative that doesn't really work. I pray each night for just the tiniest movement to lessen the pain and damage but having to take more and more for less and less effect.

I've been told it'll kill me. All the docs do is shrug and send me for the same tests I've already had. What I really need is surgery. Whatever caused it is now irrelevant. My bowel is dead.

Ho hum!
I can't for the life of me understand why doctors won't do something about this. I mean it's just not normal. Why can't they go in and relieve the blockage? Do you live in America? I sent you a PM since we haven't talked in a while
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
Can I ask what you are suffering from? I have something called Complex regional pain syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I've had it since I was 20 and I'm 34 now. So I've had it for over 14 years. I have no idea how I've managed to go on. I guess I'd have to give credit to my mother. She has been there for me every step if the way. I don't know how I've dealt with this viscious pain that I have non stop and all the other little side effects it brings with it. I must be a stubborn bitch.

I'm so sorry you're sick and especially that you got sick at such a young age! You never had a chance to live. I'd like to PM you if you don't mind.

When you say burning pain...does it feel like the areas you talk about have been set on fire? Are you hypersensitive?

Up the Willy.

Up the Willy.

I can't for the life of me understand why doctors won't do something about this. I mean it's just not normal. Why can't they go in and relieve the blockage? Do you live in America? I sent you a PM since we haven't talked in a while
I was really trying to avoid saying where they wanna stick that probe!
 
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clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
Hi Clandestine, I can totally relate to your suffering. I had a great life once and then a couple of injuries and a real bad accident ruined it. Several surgeries and suffering and yrs of pt. I improved some of my symptoms but not nearly enough to justify going on living . I also have chronic pain and disability problems. Breathing , standing, sitting, problems with it all. Neurological also. Nerve damage. I have also been through hell with the doctors and have traveled all over the country going to the best doctors trying to fix my body. My mom wants me to try one more place but I know it's usless because I have spent yrs researching this and all the best doctors have told me there is nothing left to do. There are a few doctors out there that actually care but that still doesn't mean that they can wave a magic wand and fix everything. The system also wants our money and I still set up to extract it from us all all cost and even after we die. It's a sad reality. I know what you mean as far as not being able to work , and socialize and find a place in society. I was ripped out of society from my accident. My situation is only going to get worse with aging just like anything and everything degraded as we get older. I would rather out a bullet through my head before being in a rest home and dependent on the system or whoever there was to help me. Anyway I hope you can find improvement and ideally a way out of your situation. If you ever want to talk about it fell free to pm me. Peace ✌

I'm sorry to hear about your story too :( I hope you can find some way to relieve your pain and symptoms too, I couldn't agree more with everything you said. It's surprising how many people are going through such similar experiences. If you ever need to talk too, I'm open to PM!
Can I ask what you are suffering from? I have something called Complex regional pain syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I've had it since I was 20 and I'm 34 now. So I've had it for over 14 years. I have no idea how I've managed to go on. I guess I'd have to give credit to my mother. She has been there for me every step if the way. I don't know how I've dealt with this viscious pain that I have non stop and all the other little side effects it brings with it. I must be a stubborn bitch.

I'm so sorry you're sick and especially that you got sick at such a young age! You never had a chance to live. I'd like to PM you if you don't mind.

thanks a lot! It does suck getting ill so young tbh, but I'm sorry to hear about your problems too! I've heard about complex regional pain, im really sorry. I have generalised pain daily but I doubt it's anything compared to yours. PM away, I'd love to talk more about it all.
The thing about today's illnesses, is that once you get diagnosed with a chronic disease, you are immediately afflicted with an overwhelming sense of hoplesness and a trial of grief, and then usually after this period of grief comes to an end, you adapt to your physical illness mentally and physically (usually by coming to terms with what you can/can't do anymore due to your new illness and the laws it has forcibly written for your body). We're masters of adaptation. The PROBLEM with today's illnesses, is that you can get one disease — learn to cope with said disease, and then be cursed with ANOTHER one just after you've mentally adapted to the disease(s) that caused you immense mental turmoil and hopelessness. We're never given a chance to adapt and heal — today's chronically ill folk are constantly bombarded with alien illnesses, allowing no time for relief or pleasure. How is anyone supposed to cope with that?

We were all born in the wrong generation. It really is that simple. If we were born in... lets say... year 3000, we'd likely be a gene-edited transhuman who experiences extreme (but balanced and productive) super-happiness as our default setting and no symptoms of physical or mental illness ever feltin our lifespan.

Out of the potentially hundreds of thousands+ of years humans might live for, we were unlucky enough to be born in a generation of torturous physical ailments.
That's a really interesting point. I never thought about that. Maybe it's true, who knows though, humanity could still be just as effed in the future lol
 
redbull

redbull

Member
Oct 29, 2019
34
This may sound hard to believe but I lost the ability to sleep. I had a bad dr who put me on multiple medications which interacted with each other and now i literally can't sleep naturally anymore. I'm living in hell. I don't think this has ever happened to anybody before in history. I suffer everyday.
 
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Reactions: WearyWanderer and mediocre
clandestine

clandestine

still rolling stones
Nov 17, 2019
47
This may sound hard to believe but I lost the ability to sleep. I had a bad dr who put me on multiple medications which interacted with each other and now i literally can't sleep naturally anymore. I'm living in hell. I don't think this has ever happened to anybody before in history. I suffer everyday.

I'm sorry to hear you're going through that. Idk if anyone has experienced the exact same thing, but it doesn't sound hard to believe to me, there are some conditions, a prion disease, where people are actually unable to sleep at all, or very very very little. It also comes with autonomic dysfunction. But because your problems came from the drugs it sounds like a kind of withdrawal. I'm not a doctor or anything lol just passing on what I know. Have you ever had your cortisol, norepinephrine and epinephrine levels checked?
 

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