Bullied during suicide attempt

[EternalSkies]

So I made a suicide attempt with yew last night. It's not my first at all. Not with yew, not with others. But people
who have never tried to die don't know it is not actually that easy to die especially if you have a strong body. As i've survived multiple lethal doses of different toxic plants. And yes my heart did become severely affected most of these times. Furthermore I choose my own method that I am comfortable with and have access to. Others here do not.

So I had a user in my past thread in summer of 2025 obsess over my intentions with my yew attempts and saying im not suicidal etc. Then also getting obsessed over me being trans and started harassing me in DM. This is not the same user. Just same situation. But they were prevented from contacting me again thanks to a kind moderator

I made a new thread last night for my yew attempt. I had another user similarly to that person in my past thread passive agressively attack my true motives/suicidal intention. Being attacked and questioned during a suicide attempt show no love or empathy for my situation. How can people be so cold? I never asked for this. The thread is not made to be an interrogation thread. It is meant for me as comfort when trying to die and leaving a potential last godbye.

Does anyone seriously think this user wanted the answer to this question? Or that this person actually tried doing me any good? If they were curious about a different outcome they could simply wait for me to report back.

I've been bullied so many times this year both online and IRL and had enough of it. Of course if gonna tell these people eventually to shut up and leave. I didn't ask for
their bullying or opinions. Eventually you stand up for youself after being bullied over and over. But apparently im the bad person here for actually pointing out this users clear bad intentions in a vulnerable situation.




Who seriously thinks this is anything but a rhetorical question? It is passive agressive and saying I am not trying to die. Later on this user decides to speak for me and my intentions without actually reading or asking me. To me this is just clearly a troublemaker

If you don't agree feel free to say so. But then im gonna off myself with nitrogen anyways cause i've had enough with this world lacking empathy. The normal thing to do when you have a suicidal person writing a thread is to show love. Not start an FBI interrogation speaking for me and questioning my motives.

I am not allowed to tell someone to shut up for speaking for me? Saying that im not trying to die. I just ate a toxic plant. Its hard I almost puked from its disgusting and toxic taste. Im here suffering and people come to bully me for not thinking I am suicidal enough. Yet here they have been for years on this forum without dying. So clearly they haven't tried themselves or also have a hard time dying. Yet they question me for actually trying to die






Let me know what you think. So I can end it tragically on my balcony

The reasons it makes me upset is because Im here trying to die and people IRL and online keep bullying me. And this starts almost exactly like when that person in my past thread totally went bananas on me. So I shut it down early




Here is what I wrote as a response because im tired of all these people speaking for me, saying im not suicidal and bullying me. Im literally out here eating every toxic plants there is different ways several times. To die and document how to actually die with something people never documents on..

 

[U. A.]

Alright clearly this is A Big Deal, so I'll be the adult, ignore your completely unfounded assertion that I have never attempted myself, and admit I did misremember the details of that thread (because I am actually not obsessed), and that you did not specifically say you did not want to die from doing all of that—just that "About every fourth attempt I do is a suicide attempt", which I assume relates to you consistently consuming far far less yew than an amount you said you knew would be lethal.

It was actually @Kali_Yuga13 who sat with the events of that thread with extreme equanimity who suggested the other 3/4 are in effect self-harm which is sorta problematic on a site like this, and summarised why quite succinctly:

It's frustrating to onlookers, even here with the other poster scolding you and the thread now under the watchful eye of the mods. If you substituted cutting for the pant taking, this thread would've been shut down at this point because SaSu can't in good conscience be a platform that endorses SH, even passively.

I agree—but think the site actually does passively endorse SH, and don't think it's great for the userbase. I've belaboured that point elsewhere so won't here. Get well.

 

[EternalSkies]

Why are you so obsessed with me? You looked up this thread and had to reply, instantly. Your tone in all of your replies is condescending (like you're stating you're the adult, yeah right) and you now again try to save yourself by finding some specific detail you can actually refer to. But one detail doesn't paint the whole picture.

I've consumed the said lethal dose several times (like you would know). But no one even knows it for sure because there aren't enough scientific studies from what I can see. LD 50 only states where 50% of a population dies from a dose. There is no lethal dose set in stone. All plants contain different toxic doses even parts of a plant. You're still stuck on that part with the lethality of what Im doing. Which kind of proves you're obsessed with questioning me. Why does this matter to you?

I've never said you never attempted. I said either you haven't attempted or you have and failed. Like me. Then it is seriously weird questioning me for not succeeding. When you yourself have not.

Kali Yuga has been nothing but kind in their approach. I don't mind someone brining something up with good intentions. Even if they're not completely right.

And now you're so concerned about the userbase, right. Maybe go around moderate every SH thread saying they're harmful to this userbase


I weighed around 62kg at the time of most attempts with yew. It is also stated in several medical reports the lethal dose starts from 0.6g yew per kg. That would be 37g yew. Which I acutally have consumed the time I almost died. Also yew is extremely disgusting and activates the vomiting/gag reflex only at 5g. I can only manage to eat around 35-37g at most because after that the body just rejects anything at all. And people have died from less than this

 

[mjolnir]

It's not my intention to be offensive, and I don't know if your intention is to have a peaceful passing, but for obvious reasons, using plants will never be the right approach for this purpose. After all, there's no laboratory control to guarantee a dose of the toxin, and if people replicate such an act, they will only have problems to manage later. This doesn't invalidate your pain and experience, but clearly it's not a method of passing that should be tested.

 

[EternalSkies]

It's not my intention to be offensive, and I don't know if your intention is to have a peaceful passing, but for obvious reasons, using plants will never be the right approach for this purpose. After all, there's no laboratory control to guarantee a dose of the toxin, and if people replicate such an act, they will only have problems to manage later. This doesn't invalidate your pain and experience, but clearly it's not a method of passing that should be tested.

It's fine I understand. I mean they used plants to kill off people in earlier times. Many people succeed with dying from toxic plants too. It's just unpredictable and I am okay with that

Btw this is how you interact with a person normally with good intetions. There is no motive, questioning or aggressiveness. Just a person being neutral and caring